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October 15, 2005, 11:00 am PDT
I am not the only one am I
Quote From: wild4godHi! I sortof know what you're going through. I just ended a relationship about a month ago, partly because my bf didn't understand why I needed to talk sometimes. Communication is a must in all relationships. Its good that you love him, but also he needs to respect you; if he doesn't then he really doesn't love you. I'm happy that you want to talk about issues in your relationship;I think relationships would be more successful if both bf and gf talked to each other and listened. I think guys do not understand fully of why us, women has this urgent need to talk. They may think we're trying to pick a fight, but most of the time we just want to talk some of our issues we're dealing with with our bf's. On a last note I think all guys need to talk through their feelings more with their gf's and also listen more. If everybody does these things I can assure you that the both of you will have a better relationship. <><Karina<>< I am sitting here this morning going through the exact same thing. Such little issues that kinda upset you turn into HUGE arguments all because you wanted to talk about it. I thought that is what you do. But as soon as I say, "Babe, what you are doing kinda hurts me" I get slapped with a "You just want to argue dont you!!". Well, no I dont, but I do deserve to say what is hurting me and you would think that if someone really loved you they would care about the fact that you are hurting. I just spent the past 30 minutes crying my eyes out asking him "what can we do?" "how can I approach this to make you not feel defensive?" and " what can I do to make this better so that we can go back to being happy like we were when we first woke up". But all I get is "you're pushing it" and "I am tired of always pleasing everyone else, I dont care if everyone hates me or loves me, I am just going to take care of me from now on" and of course, finally I got "just leave me alone, if you want this to get better, just leave me alone". Now how is that going to fix anything. I understand that everyone handles things differently, and everyone needs space in an argument...so let him go, and watched him come home, and then walk right past me...then start washing his truck as if I didnt exist. How long are you supposed to sit there with tears in your eyes waiting for him to care enough to come and talk things out? Why do I have to put my feelings on hold until he is ready to deal with me and what is going on? I dont want to rush him but I feel as if he doesnt care. He doesnt even bat an eye at the fact that his so called lover and best friend is crying for an hour. When is it time to say you know what, you really dont care. If you did you would put your arm around me and we would find a way to work through this. I have seen him cry twice...and you know what, my heart hit the floor. No more anger, no more frustration, all that mattered was that he was crying and it broke my heart....why does it not affect him the same way as it does me? How can you watch someone you love cry and not seem to care? Ok, I am sorry, I will stop venting online now :)
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