Quote From: anon_slcIf you are with in a relationship with someone, you expect the relationship to grow and deepen over time; you expect a heart connection to be made and maintained. You operate your life based on this expectation. When your partner in the relationship does not or cannot make an emotional connection, the relationship becomes very painful. Some of my favorite books that provide a great introduction and insight: :
Emotional Blackmail: When the People in Your Life Use Fear, Obligation and Guilt to Manipulate You by Susan Forward AND Why is it Always About You? The Seven Deadly Sins of Narcissism by Sandy Hotchkiss MAYBE Emotional Unavailability: Recognizing It, Understanding It...by Bryn Collins
The Professional Bachelors Dating Guide: How to Exploit Her Inner Psycho by Dr Brett Tate MAYBE Malignant Self Love: Narcissism Revisited by Sam Vaknin
The Sociopath Next Door by Martha Stout OR Aggression in Personality Disorders and Perversions by Otto Kernberg
Though harder to spot, emotional abuse is easier to deny. But just as physical abuse has signposts to mark its presence, emotional abuse, being a systematic attack on one's sense of self, has common traits. Physical abuse comes in degrees of severity - emotional abuse also runs the gamut of intensity and damage.
Hope it helps!
I just hope any woman who has any inkling of justifying the behavior of or has fallen for their charms or the so-called charms of any man like this, will educate themselves with some of these fine books. I have fallen for this in the past, but I got wise, educated myself, and stopped the cycle. The quality of my life and relationships after going through my learning and healing stage is immeasurably 1000% better now that I am immune and have absolutely no interest in men like this.
Reading books like this can help one identify the "red flag" and make some sense of the sick motives of guys (and of course the female versions) of these personalities.
