Quote From: marsplastiMarcia; Wow I have been experiencing the same kind of things. I too am trying to be a grownup and doing what I feel and not what other people want me to do. i call it taking control of my life and if people dont like what I do i dont care anymore. They are not me and not living my life. So lately I am like you standing up for myself and trying so hard to be a grown-up. Lately I dont worry about hurting peoples feelings.
My mom does things like your mom. Sometimes My mom is so mean so I back off and go somewhere else that she wouldnt approve of; but I am an adult and I will go and do whatever i want.
my mom also dictates alot to me what she wants me to do for her. I try so hard to keep boundaries and sometimes it works and sometimes it doesnt. Most of the time I just want to stay away to avoid
the confrontation. It makes so much sense to me now that my whole family were controllers so that is why in the past and even now I tend to attract controlling people. Its a work in progress every day.
Mars, it's good to hear from you again.
Just remember, if you could extricate yourself from your abusive controlling husband, you can handle this situation. This is the second phase of your life lessons in how to assert for yourself. You can't, and probably don't want to divorce yourself from your family, so you have to find ways to get them to treat you the way you want to be treated.
You're doing well, half the battle is recognizing the problem with clarity, and you are.
