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October 16, 2005, 2:30 pm PDT
School Issues
Quote From: ajmatleyI absolutely agree with the advice to leave promptly when saying good-bye to your child at school. So many times, the child is fine with being there...they enjoy school, the teacher, friends, activities, etc. We forget that at even at a young age, children can sense the emotions of those around them. If you are apprehensive about leaving your child, they too will feel apprehensive about being there. Sometimes they feel guilty for leaving YOU alone! (THere are some great books available for young children about what mommy will do while they are away at school.) It is a great idea to talk about school before going and once they get home. But, in addition, consider discussing your day with your child so they still feel connected to your life while they are away. Make it an adventure...a time of connection while you share your experiences with each other. As a teacher of the younger children, I agree to a point with this message. Most parents who bring their children to school should then leave promptly. The child will quickly get over any anxiety [although Mom might still be feeling upset by the separation!] However, recently I had a parent who was so anxious about what was going on in the classroom that she was passing it on to her child who seemed actually depressed to be there. I allowed her to stay for the morning before recess and it was almost as if a cloud lifted from this woman. She could see that her child was in good hands, that he had friends and that he was learning a lot. By the time recess came she was able to separate from her son quite happily - and that was the end of the boy's 'school phobia'. When Mama isn't happy, nobody's happy, I guess. Every child, every family is so individual that no hard and fast rule can apply to everyone.
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