Replies to '07/11 Abducted from School'

The School system are very lacks.  I had and incident where one of my four sons was the star center on the baskeball team and the number on pitcher on the baseball team..  My sons were the only Black children in this Tech School which was supposed to be #! in CT when I moved there from NY.  You think this is going to be great.  Well within 2 weeks of being enrolled a teacher stated to me "how was the investigation going".  The school had been investigating a group of kids in a HVAC class discussion of "Hang the new black boys" and had never notified me or my husband that this was taking place.  I totally lost it.  Cursed out the Prinicpal and the School resource officer that was handling the investigation.  This was the 9th grade.  I called the police.  The Principal was the most incompentent administrator I had ever met.  Finally the teacher and the students had to take sensitivity class, this really did not satisfy me.

During this same year during basketball season this same child was getting really poor grades after meeting this young lady at school, late for class, cutting classes, etc.  which he knew was not acceptable.  Well he told the guidance counselor that his parents were angry that he had a white girlfriend, mind you that was the only option available since they were the only black children in the school and very handsome boys at that, it was inevitable that they date white.   Well the guidance counselor suggestt to my son that he get his parents on neutral grounds and suggested that he go to stay with a fellow student, instead of saying well I contact your parent to discuss it.  He literally told my son to emancipate himself from us. He was also aware that my son was going to run away to this kids house. Well being the parents that we are we go to the school to pick up the boys and one is missing and can't be found.  The guidance couselor had told him to run away to this kids house to get your parents on neutral grouds which should have been his office. I did not know about the conversation with the guidance counselor at that time, it was after baseball practice and no one was in the office that evening and I called the police when I got home. I called some of the kids friends and finally got a phone number for the boys house who he went too.  Well the mother said ok I call your mother later, and went to the mall shopping.   My son nor the kid would pick up the phone, By 1:00 in the am I finally was able to get and address and go disccuss with my son, what the heck was going on.  After talking with the mother which had several children being rasie out side of the home,one kid like here, one there, one with the sister, I could see how disfunctional she was.  The school called Child welfare on me, sent 2 case worker and 3 CT police to my home, the 3 police was because my husband was a big guy per the principal.  To have these people asking my sons questions and check  my two frigerator for for food, checking for scars an beds, asking when is the last time your parents hit you, it was humiliating. Since my other three sons confimed that this particular son was just being a brat and they had not been beating in years(and mind you they all had just gotten new $100 sneakers and were always well dressed, very neatly when these people arrived we were on our way to visit new high schools cause I pulled them out that day), they dropped the case after completing the investigation.  But to this day, I feel  I should have sued the school, the principal and the counselor because it is something you never forget.  My son later told me that the boy was using cocaine (a ninth grader) and was no longer his friend.  I use to wonder if I had left my son with the woman and her family for a few days would he appreciate what he had at home a little more.  After that the principal would bend over for me to put my foot up his butt for the next 3 years.  But to this day my kids have so much respect for the strengths of there mother constantly fighting for them.  And have developed into extremely strong young men because of all the racist issues they faced in Torrington CT, Truck set on fire, confederate flag left on lawn, bullet hole into one of my sons bedroom window.  It was so unreal that all this happen in this time and age only 6 years ago.  I am really suprised none of my boys were ever hurt in that very racist environment.

As parents we have to stay strong and hold the system reponsible when we put our children in there care.
Also as caring parents listen to our kids, take the good and the bad, my sons to this day do not lie to me beacuse I have always told them you have to remember that lie and tell it the same way each time so don't do it.  I thank God that this same kid who is now 22 and still playing baseball in CT, has the strength of his parents, cause dad is CALM, and mom is Storm, so he's got a good balance.