Replies to 'Teens and Sex'

 I need a little help here. Let me first lay out the situation. I have 2 teenage boys(16 & 13) who live with their mother. I see them often now and if you average it over the years I have been very involved, missing very few opportunities to be with them.  My intent is NOT to bash their mother here Please keep that in mind.  

The divorce was nasty and there have been flare ups but it was over 10 years ago. She had an addiction problem. She has been in recovery for years. There is no man in the house at this time and there really has never been one. Both boys have become involved with internet porn. They are not obsessed with it because they have other interests, but it is a problem. (IMHO). They also admit that it is a problem, but they also think that boys’ looking at pornography is normal. I can’t say that I totally disagree. I had a Penthouse magazine or two when was a teen, but it more a question of magnitude. I am not stupid enough to say its art, cut me a break. Sexuality is all around and it bombards our children. They can’t get a way from it even when they want too. 

Here is the basic premise. The 16 yo has internet connectivity to his PC the 13 yo does not. But there is nothing though stops them from put tin porn on the PC by way of other media which is easy enogh to get. They are arguing that what they have has not been added to since I originally found it last year and erased. I have checked the create and modified date on the files and they seem to be telling the truth. It they say to me if I get rid of it they can just get more. So rather than clean it all up I should just put blocking software on the PC so they can’t search the porn on the net. They say this will keep them safe from Deviant stuff. IN the mean time I am having frank conversations with them @ Sex and sexual activity. What is real and what is sex “Product” and deviant. How this stuff can make real relationships with real women very difficult. This is difficult. I can’t make it go away. I have to give them tools to live with it and process it? It is not comfortable but I can’t seem to find another way that will realistically deal with it. Please provide me with a reality check?