Quote From: hrmenyI have a husband like the guys on the show, and he used to say some of the same mean and hurtful things. We started going to counselling and he has become kinder, but I sense he feels the same way deep inside about my weight. We never have sex anymore and we're acting like mere roomates. I know he loves me.......he just doesn't know how to relate as a "husband" I told him he should've taken "husband" lessons before we got married, because he really doesn't have a clue sometimes. I don't really feel like he respects me because of some deep rooted fellings he has for his Mother. I also suggested he get counselling for himself but he won't. I'm considering Lap Band surgery now...not for him but for myself. Once I lose the weight, somone told me he'll just find something else to "whine" about.
What to do ??????
No amount of counseling is going to change what someone sees as sexually appetizing (within normal sexually stimulated situations.. not sick stuff). What turns us on sexually differs but no one should expect love to lead us to sexual desire towards anyone. Love is not sex.
As for the surgery you are considering, do as much research as you can find about every aspect of it.
I hope you not taking the advice of some irritable and obvious agenda oriented comments that’s been made thus far. Communicate by asking questions and also try to be understanding even though you feel neglected in a way. Do your best for the relationship, that way if you’ve done so, you will have little to no regrets moving on with your life. Life takes work, effort and dedication to run smooth. Best wishes.
