Quote From: judyblue22I know this will infuriate all the religious folk on this board, but I think this focus on sex is much too overblown. I don't think that what we do with our fun bits defines who we are, how well we will perform as spouses or how "good" we are. I define good as being kind, generous and tolerant. Loads of religious people who have rigidly avoided sex except during marriage are mean, selfish and intolerant of others. If you want to be proud of something, do something that you can be proud of.
I would be MUCH more interested in a man who had had other serious relationships than I would be in a man who had reached the age of 30 without ever loving another person. I wouldn't expect him to be capable of having a deep relationship or be intimate. To be able to be truly intimate with a partner, there has to be a feeling of openness and mutual acceptance-farts and all. You can't ever be truly intimate with a woman when focused on their external appearance.
You're certainly entitled to feel the way you do. It doesn't infuriate me.
I remained a virgin partially for religious reasons but there were other motivating factors. I had a healthy fear of STDs, which can do great damage. And I do think my sexual history defines part of who I am, although I don't think it makes me better than anyone else.
"Loads of religious people who have rigidly avoided sex except during marriage are mean, selfish and intolerant of others. "
That may be so. But there are plenty of non-virgins who are non-religious that are equally mean, selfish and intolerant. That's a rather wide brush to paint religious folks with.
