Topic : 02/13 Love Smart Island, Part 1

Hi everyone!  This is Colleen from Monday's episode of Love Smart.  First of all, thanks so much for tuning in, this truely was a leap of faith and a unique experience for us and we're hoping everyone gets something from our goof-ups! 

I've read through some of the posts and I just wanted to add in my 2 cents since the show has aired.  I know many of you are unhappy there weren't more women in your demographic and felt that the group chosen wasn't a proper cross-section of women.  However, what I think everyone is missing is that the mistakes made on the show, are mistakes that can be made by people of all ages, and just b/c they were made by a 26 yr old, doesn't mean a 50 year old couldn't do the same thing.  I did this experiment so I could have a bird's eye view of myself in a social setting, and I wish more people could have the opportunity to do the same!  Sometimes, there are things we're not aware that we're doing, or signals we're not aware were giving off (or not giving off!).  This show was done to point out those things not only to us, but to those of you who might be doing the same thing.  It was about giving people a try, when otherwise we might have written them off.  I think all of you can do that easier than you think!  :) 

I didn't open up to Todd on the island b/c I was afraid of being vulnerable in front of the cameras.  It was a very surreal situation for all of us to be "dating" with a round eyeball of a lens in your face for 3 days, just remember that.  When he and I got back to real life, things were much easier, and I certainly didn't drop anymore flowers!!  (Which I've honestly never done before and wasn't intentional!) 

As for those of you who feel all of us girls on the show are "extremely picky, high-maintence, and don't have real lives", maybe Dr. Phil's chapter on being judgemental might be of help!  (Joke!) :)  I personally have a real life...one I'm very proud of.  Each of these girls do...one is a doctor, a lawyer, a singer.  They're all amazing and to think that they have nothing to do but sit around and pick men apart all day is rediculous.  Everyone has challenges in this crazy game of dating, at whatever age.  I personally am never approached by men, but, I hate being the chaser.  What's a girl to do?  :)  I'm old fashioned like that, and props to Todd for taking initiative!  BUT, obviously those of us with dating troubles might want to take a look outside the box to see if it COULD be something we're doing, not the other person.  I did.  If you think you don't want to change what you're doing, check out your current result and think of Dr. Phil saying, "How's that workin' for you?!" 

Thanks for watching and good luck with your "game!" 

Hi everyone!  This is Colleen from Monday's episode of Love Smart.  First of all, thanks so much for tuning in, this truely was a leap of faith and a unique experience for us and we're hoping everyone gets something from our goof-ups! 

I've read through some of the posts and I just wanted to add in my 2 cents since the show has aired.  I know many of you are unhappy there weren't more women in your demographic and felt that the group chosen wasn't a proper cross-section of women.  However, what I think everyone is missing is that the mistakes made on the show, are mistakes that can be made by people of all ages, and just b/c they were made by a 26 yr old, doesn't mean a 50 year old couldn't do the same thing.  I did this experiment so I could have a bird's eye view of myself in a social setting, and I wish more people could have the opportunity to do the same!  Sometimes, there are things we're not aware that we're doing, or signals we're not aware were giving off (or not giving off!).  This show was done to point out those things not only to us, but to those of you who might be doing the same thing.  It was about giving people a try, when otherwise we might have written them off.  I think all of you can do that easier than you think!  :) 

I didn't open up to Todd on the island b/c I was afraid of being vulnerable in front of the cameras.  It was a very surreal situation for all of us to be "dating" with a round eyeball of a lens in your face for 3 days, just remember that.  When he and I got back to real life, things were much easier, and I certainly didn't drop anymore flowers!!  (Which I've honestly never done before and wasn't intentional!) 

As for those of you who feel all of us girls on the show are "extremely picky, high-maintence, and don't have real lives", maybe Dr. Phil's chapter on being judgemental might be of help!  (Joke!) :)  I personally have a real life...one I'm very proud of.  Each of these girls do...one is a doctor, a lawyer, a singer.  They're all amazing and to think that they have nothing to do but sit around and pick men apart all day is rediculous.  Everyone has challenges in this crazy game of dating, at whatever age.  I personally am never approached by men, but, I hate being the chaser.  What's a girl to do?  :)  I'm old fashioned like that, and props to Todd for taking initiative!  BUT, obviously those of us with dating troubles might want to take a look outside the box to see if it COULD be something we're doing, not the other person.  I did.  If you think you don't want to change what you're doing, check out your current result and think of Dr. Phil saying, "How's that workin' for you?!" 

Thanks for watching and good luck with your "game!" 

I really enjoyed the show today and I'm looking forward to watching tomorrow's show. I found out a little bit about myself today, things I have suspected but probably didn't want to face. I'm a 60 year old widow. I was happily married for 30 years, been alone for 8 years now. It took me a long time to get back out on the dating scene, it's been a real eye-opener in many ways.  

Now the problem...me...I'm the problem. I recognized myself today. I have so many walls up that no one can even begin to get passed them. I meet these really nice guys, we have a great time over coffee or lunch and then I never see them again because I just don't feel anything. It's not their fault, I just don't allow myself to feel anything. 

I don't know if watching my husband die a day at a time has anything to do with it or the fact that I fell in love with a man a few years ago who was really good with the physical but couldn't handle the emotional connection to me. It scared him and now everyone scares me. 

I do have one suggestion for all of you wondering where to go to meet someone. I joined every dance class I could find, while I have yet to master any of them...I have made some of the most wonderful and supportive friends anyone could ever hope for. I lost weight and gained confidence but most of all I have learned how to dance like nobody's watchin. I may be alone but people, I'm not lonely. 

Yes, I am frustrated because most of the men my age are looking at the young ones. Once in a while they get them. You would be surprised at how many men in their 50's are on the singles sites, divorced and raising children under the age of 10. Yep, they got just what they wanted and she left them with the kids.