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Topic : 06/28 Family Troublemakers

Number of Replies: 197
New Messages This Week: 0
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Created on : Friday, February 10, 2006, 12:50:54 pm
Author : DrPhilBoard1

(Original Air Date: 02/17) Too many of us have a relative who stirs the pot. Meet a family who feels held captive by their youngest daughter, Marcie. Russ and Cheryl say every day is tension-filled because Marcie's "Jekyll and Hyde" outbursts have them living on the edge. Russ and his oldest daughter, Carrie, issue Marcie an ultimatum. Then, Amy and Leesa believe their mother, Myra, is the quintessential "drama queen." They say her overbearing behavior and sharp tongue make family gatherings a living hell! Find out the New Year's resolution Myra made that rubbed her daughters the wrong way. Talk about the show here.

 

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February 17, 2006, 1:07 pm CST

MONSTER-IN-LAW!!!!

my mother-in-law i believe is the trouble maker in mine and my hubby's family.  she cant leave things alone, she always has a rude remark to me. it drives me crazy. she wont do it in front of my hubbym but infront of everyone else.  she has even gone as far as to tell me that i spend too much money for things. i want to know what she is talking about because i only spend money on diapers, wipes, groceries, and gas for the car. her son is the one that spends the money!! i dont get it, sometimes i think she is just out to get me. i have tried to break her of the habit by telling her off, and putting her in her place, but it never works. i know that one of these days it will stop and i will be the one to stop it. if anybody out there has someone like that in thier family, GOOD LUCK!!!!!
 
February 17, 2006, 1:08 pm CST

Generational Conflicts

The show about family trouble makers helped me to see that my family is not the only dysfunctional one as I had thought!  Dr. Phil confirmed to me to continue to do what I've been doing and that's choosing not to engage myself in the cycle of conflict.  It can happen so easily; however, I've decided that I if I do engage myself, my own two children (ages 4 and 2 months) will suffer what I suffered.  My mom is controlling, manipulative and angry.  Holidays are not without an argument.  We barely have contact with my father's side of the family because there's been conflicts there all my life!  Recently, my parents argued and I saw how my 15 year old brother has been affected by all of the conflicts.  He went into a rage and said that he was tired of all the arguing.  In order to stop the cycle from repeating itself, I am on my way to seek help from my pastor.
 
February 17, 2006, 1:09 pm CST

there is hope

I have a daughter who is 14 and until a year ago, we woke up everyday wondering what her mood would be...she would get so angry at the smallest things, hit her older sister, slam doors,  use extremely foul and unacceptable language,clear the tops of tables breaking things and even banging up my car with a bat.  I took her to an intake program at the hospital and started to get her help.  She was suffering from depression and anxiety...we got counseling and put her on medication-Lexapro.  then a few  months later I had a full academic profile done on her and found out that she also is ADD and she started medication for that.  At first I felt bad having her on this medication, but she is now the most delightful 14 year old, she is normal and has her moments, but nothing extreme and went from being on academic probation to having a GPA of 3.2. I tell more people my story because I think people are embarrassed about family members who act like this but if you keep with them and find the right help....there is hope.
 
February 17, 2006, 1:09 pm CST

Hang in there Leesa!

Leesa, 

  

I went to elementary school and junior high with you and I remember even then you used to have trouble with your mom.  Obviously you have grown up into a smart, beautiful woman, despite your relationship with her.  Hang in there!  I remember your strong spirit that I admired even back then - you'll either work this out or say good riddance. 

  

Best of luck, 

Jennifer Hayles Roberts 

 
February 17, 2006, 1:15 pm CST

THIS IS BS

Quote From: donnelly

You should be ashamed of yourself for posting this publicly.   

  

That being said, Dr. Phil will probably agree with you.   

  

She may not be able to pinpoint the problems she has with you because they are so deep-seeded, and also because you have clearly shown yourself to be one of the many people that need blame to be the answer for problems.  Let your child grow, and try on a little UNCONDITIONAL LOVE for a change! 

THERE WAS NOTHING WRONG WITH ANYTHING THAT SHE SAID!!!!!!  SHE IS TRYING TO HELP HER DAUGHTER WITH ISSUES AND HER DAUGHTER IS NOT ACCEPTING IT. I AM 24 YEARS OLD AND DIDNT GET TO GO TO COLLEGE, CAUSE OF FINACIAL REASONS. IT SOUNDS LIKE TO ME THE MOM JUST WANTS WHAT IS BEST FOR HER DAUGHTER. THE DAUHGTER NEEDS TO GET HER HEAD OUT OF HER BOOTY AND MAKE AN EFFORT TO DO THE THINGS SHE NEEDS TO DO. SHE IS AN ADULT NOW, TIME TO START ACTING LIKE ONE!!!! MY MOM IS THE MOST WONDERFUL. WE HAVE BUTTED HEADS BEFORE, BUT I WAS A TEENAGER. THE DAUGHTER OF THIS LADY NEEDS TO GROW UP AND ACT HER AGE BEFORE THINGS GET BAD. YES THERE MAY BE DEEPER ISSUES BUT THAT DOESNT MEAN TO FORGET ABOUT YOUR MOTHER THAT HAS BROUGHT YOU TO WHERE YOU ARE.  

WOW!!!! THAT FELT GOOD TO GRIPE!!!! 

 
February 17, 2006, 1:15 pm CST

I can relate

If you combine those two families, you have mine.  A trouble making mother and sister!!!!  It was like looking at my own family and how sad it is.  I hope these people can get some help and soon!!!!  Bless their hearts!!!! 
 
February 17, 2006, 1:16 pm CST

02/17 Family Troublemakers

Quote From: omnium2

This controlling, overweight mother of the two daughters (the hypercritical Mom) is EXACTLY LIKE MY MOTHER....to a TEE! It's scarey!
Isn't it sad when you can relate so closely to the people on TV?  I was embarrassed watching it.  My god, our moms and this mom should go bowling!!! 
 
February 17, 2006, 1:18 pm CST

Dr Phil Show.

Doctor Phil. I think Family Makertrouble is no good at all unless you cause trouble but on other han- 

d it is not fun at all nor it not good to tease other peoples aswell. Getting mad can get yourself in---- 

lots of trouble or worse go to jail for whose know what or whose know how long it will take to get--- 

out of jail aswell. Well I had better close now. Sincerley Your. Russell Vlaanderen.----------------------- 

 
February 17, 2006, 1:20 pm CST

I am so sorry

Quote From: papillon79

        I watched this show in hopes that I could see my situation in these guests.  I hoped to see a really bad parent and see what Dr. Phil's advice would be in dealing with them.  My mother and I cant get along if our lives depended on it.  I have tried to make peace with her but it always fails.  I am at a loss with what to do I need advice and maybe one of you may have some advice for me.  My brother and I had a not so happy childhood and I do not hold that against her.  But by her third marriage she found a wonderful man with no drug problems and was no abusive and our lives got better.  When I was 14 she decided to have more children and my little brother and sister came right after each other.  After 10 years of marriage she went back to her cheating ways.  She started making me lie for her so she could go be with her boyfriend.  I was only 16 and couldn't take the pressure so I told my step dad about the affairs and the lying.  He talked to her and she told him that I lied just to break them up, so they kicked me out.  I was living at friends house and in cars for a year when she finally told the truth to him and moved out to go live with her boyfriend.  I then moved back home to take care of my 3 year old brother and 2 year old sister.  Her boyfriend had children and she didn't want them anymore.  I have taken care of them ever since.  They grew up calling me mommy.  People always thought I was my step dad's wife.  I have gotten married and have my own home but still take care of my brother and sister that are 13 and 11 now.  I have tried to get along with her for the kids but we just end up fighting over her lack of responsibility.  This is just scratching the surface of all the things that have happened.  I just fight with her everyday even though I wont talk to her anymore, she calls my siblings and tells them to tell me things.  She calls family and tells them lies just to cause drama.  When she gets mad and you she is very vindictive.  I just don't know how to get away from someone that wont leave you alone. 

Wow, that is quite a story.  I am so sorry to hear that you have had this life.  You can't not talk to her huh?  Maybe just tell your family that you don't want to hear anything your mother has to say so please don't relate any messages from her????  Do you think that may work?   

I know it is your mother and believe me it is hard to cut ties but it can be done and that is when you can start to heal. 

Good luck!!! 

 
February 17, 2006, 1:22 pm CST

02/17 Family Troublemakers

Quote From: steph124ny

My mother is a really nice lady. My dad is a really nice guy. They just didn't work well together and got divorced when I was 14. To be honest, it wasn't really that traumatic because they kept the fighting clean for the sake of me and my brother. Sounds nice....BUT THEN.....Enter the evil step-mother.  For the life of me, I can't figure out why my dad married her. They got married when I was already married with a child so I figured...what the heck, he's an adult and so I am so who am I to judge?  This woman is just plain rotten to my children. Her daughter has a child and she has her over all the time. My kids are apparently too much trouble. She even has seperate Christmas Trees so our stuff doesn't get mixed up together. Her daughter's tree is in the living room with the beautiful Victorian decorations. Mine is in the basement. She gave me all the ornaments that my dad saved from when me and my brother were kids. She won't allow them on a tree (even my Charlie Brown tree in the basement) because they were from the time of my mom. 

  

The sad thing is that my father just doesn't see it.  I don't want to alienate my kids from my dad because he is wonderful to them. It's just her!!!! I spend very little time with them and my kids only see the once in awhile. My dad says he would like to spend more time with my kids, but he always brings her and I can't see subjecting my kids to blatent inequality. They have most definately noticed it on their own. I don't really know what to do because I love my dad to pieces. He seems quite happy with her and I don't want to disrupt that, but it sure would be nice if he'd stick up for me once in awhile. Not to be too childish, but I WAS HERE FIRST! 

  

Steph 

DONT FEEL BAD FOR ANYTHING!! NONE OF IT IS YOUR FAULT. JUST REMEMBER THAT ONE OF THESE DAYS HE WILL SEE IT. AT LEAST YOUR DAD WANTS TO SPEND WITH YOU AND YOUR KIDS. MY DAD LEFT WHEN I WAS 13. I AM NOW ALMOST 25 AND THE LAST TIME I SAW MY DAD WAS THE NIGHT I GRADUATED HIGHISCHOOL. THAT WAS MAY 25, 2000. THE NEXT TIME I HEARD FROM HIM WAS DEC. 30, 2000 THE NIGHT ME AND MY HUBBY GOT MARRIED.HE LEFT A NASTY MESSAGE AND YOU COULD HERE HIS WHORE IN THE BACKGROUND(THE ONE THAT HE HAD WHEN MY MOM KICKED HIM OUT!). TELLING HIM WHAT TO SAY. NOW I HAVE A DAUGHTER THAT IS ALMOST 3 AND A SON ONTHE WAY. HE KNOWS ABOUT MY DAUGHTER, BUT NOT ABOUT MY SON, HE HAS SAID HI TO MY DAUGHTER IN AUG.OF 2004, BUT HASNT EVEN TRIED TO CALL SINCE THEN. GOOD LUCK WITH YOUR DAD. IF HE IS WILLING TO SPEND TIME WITH YOU AND YOUR KIDS MEET HIM AT MCDONALDS WITH OUT HER SO YOU 2 CAN TALK.!!!!
 
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