Quote From: gallenFor Grant, I wonder....when your little one was having surgery were the spots on the carpet really that important?
I understand the direction you are headed with this question.
I understand the difference between personal preference and a priority.
I try hard to stress the two very differently.
It is very hard for me to handle things that aren't to my personal preference. I can hear the crowds screaming and yelling as I say that, but it is the honest and simple truth. In my mind the preferences I have are widely accepted as standards across what ever spectrum you are looking in. I think the key is tempering the facts and limitations of the present situation into those preferences/standards and to make incremental changes towards improvement!
Having said that, my job and central focus right now, and has been since October 2005, is on my own circle of control. That doesn't mean that my thoughts, feelings, and opinions from before magically disappear - they are still there. I am engrossed in another pretty intense project right now that is a lot of work.
Well, I apologize for not responding sooner. Life is crazy. We are preparing for a week in Hawaii with the boys and that is very time consuming. Which brings me to my story to share...bear with me! MY idea of packing for this trip started months ago. Making lists, buying toiletries here instead of in Hawaii (huge sales taxes!) and organizing the clothes we would take right along with matching t-shirts for the swim suits for the kids! Also, MY personal preference/priority would be to make sure all papers are in the same place for easy access- itinerary, vouchers for certain events, etc. In my mind, this is not unreasonable or out of reach. It also goes to how I was raised and how things (for me) have always been. Now, my husbands side is very different. HIS idea of packing started this last Sunday- he pulled some swim suits and a couple of shirts from the closet, grabbed a toothbrush and put them in a bag! In HIS mind, we're ready to go. As you can see, my frustration level is getting higher and higher!The decision was made to pack my oldesn't son's bag. As I was pulling out outfits making a mental note of where they would be worn, I looked over to see they had been put in the bag! I lost it, yelled and then realized- he was trying to do good! Kelly is trying, too. Kids and life are NOT always perfect no matter what we do. All we can do is hope for the best and plan for the worst. Yes, I like order and I am more relaxed when things go smoothly and planning is a BIG part in that for me. However, MY HUSBAND cannot be expected to surrender to my line of thinking but rather make adjustments that do not demean, diminish or otherwise make him any less than he is. I hope this example serves you well.
Dr. Phil revisits the topic of what makes a good wife. Grant and Kelly first appeared on the show because Grant expected his wife to live up to his demanding standards. He wanted a cleaner house, better meals and a sexier spouse. After seven years, his constant criticism and disappointment had her ready to throw in the towel on trying to become the "perfect wife." Dr. Phil’s first talk with Grant and Kelly caused quite a stir as thousands of viewers wrote in choosing sides. How are Grant and Kelly now? Has Grant abandoned his critical ways and his expectation of having a Stepford wife? And why is he no longer wearing his wedding ring? Talk about the show here.
