Topic : 02/21 More Wifestyles

I have watched and read post after post about this topic and sat quiet while the masses spout out what feminism in the 21st century has taught all women to think and feel about their role in this world, and nothing more.   

I am a woman, myself.  I am 24 years old and I've been married for 2 years to a wonderful husband.  He works as an accountant and I stay home.  I have a college degree and was a successful business woman for the beginning of our marriage at which point we both decided that my place was better off in the home.  Things around the house weren't getting done like they should have.  We were eating out a lot, because neither of us had time to cook after a long day of work.  Laundry piled up.  The list goes on...I knew all along in school that eventually I would leave the work force to have kids, and not return until they were all grown and had left home.  This was my decision, even before I met my husband.  Luckily, I met a man who agreed with my views on the roles of husband and wife.  I am lucky to have met a man that wants to take care of our family's needs financially.  And he would say that he is lucky to have met a woman who wants to take care of our family's needs in the home.   

This is where most of you are missing it.  THEY ARE EQUAL.  While Grant may have a bit too much emphasis on the way things are done and details details details, he understands that the job that his wife does is as important as his.  In fact, he realizes it so much, that he wants perfection.  Not just for him, but because in some wierd way, he knows that Kelly and the kids could be happy too.  What he doesn't know is that perfection doesn't always bring happiness, but he's on the right track. 

You see, I'm sure when Grant signed up to be an electrical engineer that he was presented with a list of job duties that could be read for days.  And those duties only outline what he is expected to do at work.  The list of 75 things that Grant said a wife should know how to do...IT'S THE SAME AS HIS LIST OF JOB DUTIES AT WORK.  There is nothing different.  Grant has a boss that he answers to ever day.  If something is done wrong, he hears about it.  He is evaluated, watched, looked over...All to be sure that he is performing well.  Who is Kelly's boss?  Herself?  Just because her job is at home with the kids means that she doesn't have to answer to anyone is things aren't getting done?  That doesn't seem fair.   

When my husband comes home, he doesn't go around with a white glove to make sure that I've dusted every nook and cranny of the house, but if he sees that maybe the laundry has piled up, he'll ask why...And if the dinner is burnt (which by the way, SHOULD be on the table and hot when he gets home) he tells me...It's not exactly like Grant's rating system, but it's close.  And I appreciate that, because I want my husband who works SO hard for me every day to be happy when he retreats to his home and his wife.   

I am sure that Kelly is doing all that she can to make Grant happy.  It's obvious that his expectations are a bit high, but I don't think that it's entirely selfish on his part like everyone is making it out to be.  It's obvious that he's working hard to be satisfied with a little less now and then, but Kelly should be working just as hard to NOT be satisfied.  That's how we move up in our jobs right?  We push harder to be better?  We impress the boss by standing out over all the rest?  I want my husband to see that I can keep a gorgeous house, have dinner ready, have the laundry finished, beds made, floor swept, and still have my hair in place and makeup looking great when he gets home.  Why?  Because THAT IS MY JOB AS A WIFE TO HIM AND AS A FUTURE MOTHER TO OUR CHILDREN.  Someone posted earlier and said that this view is from the 50's...Maybe it is.  But God...Look at the 50's.  What was so wrong with that era compared to today?  And who says just because it's 2006 means that we're right today and wrong back then?  Because we've evolved?  I think not.  More families stayed together and lived happily together in the 50's than we ever will again.  And don't say it's because the woman didn't have a voice and just sat quietly while her husband walked all over her, because even though that was sometimes true, it wasn't always...certainly not the majority.  

The bottom line is, not all women are called to take a place in the work world.  I have been saying since I was a little girl that I've wanted to be a housewife when I grew up.  Never a doctor or a model like all my friends...I wanted to be a companion and a lover for my husband.  It's my job to make him happy, and he will always love me for that.   

look, i live in Israel and the show only aired today, so i don't know if you will even check and see this but i hope you do. I have been married to a muslim for 13 years now. I am from a Jewish family but was raised by christians and am a believer. I know how criticle they are. I live with it on a daily basis. The dishes aren't done on time, the floor isn't clean enough. I come home from hard phisical work and why do i sit down to a cup of coffee when there is house work to do. If i put on a few pounds, well, i get told what a big ass i have and that he doesn't like that on a woman. I am on average 125lb. so now that you know how rediculious that is, you can understand my frustration with it. but you know what, I CAN'T CHAINGE WHO HE IS OR HOW HE THINKS! WHAT I CAN DO IS CHAINGE THE WAY I REACT TO HIM! AND THAT IS WHAT I HAVE DONE. I DON'T GET UP AND JUMP WHEN HE SAYS JUMP OR ASK HIM HOW HI, I SAY, WHEN I GET TO IT YOU WILL SEE THAT IT IS DONE! When he makes comments to me about my wide load i ask him what he is going to do about his gray balding head? at least i can loose the wieght. When he curses me and puts me down I ask him what collage he got that degrea in? it must have been one of hi regaurd. I see things differently. He can't help what has been put into him for years, but i can help what i will take! you don't like the way the floor looks the mop is to the left!! you don't like the dishes in the sink, pull up  your sleaves buddy and help out. The biggest thing is we have 3 daughters together and i have tought them the same thing. When he gets nasty in the way he askes one of the girls for something, they will look at him and say " do i look like a wightress to you?"  or  " i wasn't put on this earth to surve man. i was put on it to surve GOD!" I really hope you learn how to cope with this world of islam. it isn't an easy one. and don't ever be pushed to chainge who you are or what  you stand for! i wish you a lot of luck!! and i will pray for you!