Topic : 08/08 Cheaters

Quote From: ihatekate

I was cheated on, through the internet. I found the I love You.  It was Dec.12,2005 and I am still not over it.  Will I ever be? It is driving me crazy.  He says it will never happen again, but ever time I hear the key board clicking I wonder. 

Quote From: kim_rog

I think you should leave her. I was married for 20 years, and was cheated on more than once. It is too hard to get over the pain that a cheater causes, and i do not think the trust is really ever there once it happens. Like Dr.Phil says " if you want to predict the future, look at the past." this is what made me wake up and realize i had to ask him to leave me and my two kids. They saw it all, and were not happy with the behavior he was taking on. As a family now, my children and i are so much happier, and i think there is a feeling of security and trust back in this house, by what i have been able to give them and show them. It was not an easy decision for me to make, but i am so glad i finally took control and made the right choice. He is now engaged to one of my old friends,(yes another one he had cheated on me with) and thank her for taking him away from me, because it would of happened again, just with someone else i am very sure of that!

Quote From: heforgives

I am so sorry, but in my opinion and it is only my opinion, I think it is time you move on.  She is obviously lying to you. 

Quote From: yc1968

For me it was after 13 years of marriage that my husband had an affair. He was out of the house for two months before we decided to work on getting our marriage back. It has been a year. The pain is still there but it is gradually subsiding. It is a work in progress. When my mind starts to go there, I just tell myself that I wont live in the past. Work on the now. See the good things now. If he ever does it again I will leave with no question. I believe we are human and sometimes we fail, but everyone deserves one chance to redeem themselves. (ONE)

Quote From: devotedhusband

I have been married to a woman who is 7 years older than I am. We both are in our 40's and last year, was a very sad time in my life. My wife had an affair with a 20 year old grocery clerk(who she said that she really loves) and planned it that had me moved out so that we could work on our marriage. She got a roach infested apartment for me and after the first night there, I went back to the house in the morning and tell her I will look for a place on my own. After I came home, I realized that he was over there last night with her but was already gone. I told her about the phone records that I had and told her to leave and she called the police and made false accusations about me. She was with this boy for about a month and a half when she started to have feelings for me to even kiss me outside the house with her boyfriend in the house. She later found out that he is a crystal meth user and even had move him in with my 8 year old son(how confusing is that for a child to have daddy home one day and a few days later another boy who was 12 years older than him moving in and sleeping with his mom) for a week. Anyway we got back together and decided that we need a fresh start and a new place to live. We decided on France and she went there first with my son in March(since I am the bread winner and she sells on Ebay for a little extra money). Things were going great, when I noticed an email from her friend and she telling her to email her on another account because I help her with her ebay business and will see the emails. I reacted and told her that she is on her own in which she wrote back to me that she only told her friend that because her friend hates me. 2 weeks after that she started a yahoo france profile looking for a man 18 to 35 years old and that she is a divorced american woman(also lied about her age being 10 years younger). I caught her in the act and was so mad and told her off. She said that she was afraid that she is in a foreign country and I might abandon her(she has childhood issues about being abandon), so she was looking for a man as a backup..so she said. I do not trust her at all and do not know what to do as part of me wants to be with her and other times cannot put up with this. Lately it feels like she is drifting away but she said that she does not want ot talk to me because I always want to talk about our relationship and accuse her, as she wants action for me to be a husband and take care of her. She said that I am controlling(because I don't want her to see other men) and angry(I wonder why), All my friends said that I should leave her and leave her hard. They said that I should start taking care of myself for once instead of everything for her. I am dealing with a very smart woman who has her masters in psychology and is like Dr Phil in her counseling style. I love her but don't know if she is truly in this marriage or if she is cheating on me in France. I don't know what to do, do I stay and be the hero in this marriage or just leave her for good.

Quote From: twoboysmama

I am worried that my husband of 2 1/2 years is cheating.  He has been spending time with his friends wife while his friend is at work (and he is away from our home at work).  He says it because the kids want to play together....He says I am always welcome to come along with him to work, but I am not that thrilled to just hang out after work and drink and smoke (not my idea of a good time).....

 

Are there any HUGE signs?  I think I know the usual signs....

 

 

Please help!

Quote From: mereckil

We have been married almost 5 years tuesday is our anniversary. I recently discovered he has profile on match.com, he has been getting emails from other woman wanting to meet him and one of them has left a message on our answering machine. He claims he is not cheating and he knows nothing about the profile or the emails and has no idea who called our home and caller id is no help she blocked her number. I dont know what to do I feel so lost and hurt we have 3 kids, I want to leave but I unfortunately am still in love with him. I dont know what to do. do i end our marriage over this? our children are very young, I cant stop crying. Nothing has ever hurt so much. Will counseling help or is it just a temporary fix. I think he is a sex addict, he is always watching pornography on the computer he even takes pictures of girls with his camera phone, I found some recently of girls flashing their chests about 15 of them but he says I shouldn't be jealous that its normal for guys to do this. That I am being paranoid and a prude.