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Topic : Bullies

Number of Replies: 535
New Messages This Week: 0
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Created on : Thursday, June 30, 2005, 12:44:13 pm
Author : dataimport
Bullying is far more serious than just name-calling and teasing. It's escalated to include harassment, beatings and even death threats. Share your bully stories, give and get advice from other parents.

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September 11, 2008, 3:32 pm CDT

FEMALE WITH PEDOPHILIAC TENDENCIES

Quote From: borido

 My definition of the word "pedophile" is (to keep it short) somebody who feels sexual attracted to children who are younger than about 12. I think that most pedophiles don't sexually abuse children, and I also think that most pedophiles don't dare to say that they are (and imo the media isn't helping). Now, may I ask you which word you use for such a pedophile who is a virgin?

I am not a stupid person; however, I feel kind of dumb right now.  Apparently, I had written about myself in the 'My Diaries' section instead of a more 'open' space on this board.  I have come to this site in hopes of being able to connect/communicate with thoughtful, genuine and concerned persons.  I would greatly appreciate it if you all would go to MY DIARIES and read my posts.  When I tried replying to 'patsgirlboy', I ended up starting a NEW diary.  So, please, read "BOTH" of my diaries.  I NEED A LOT OF HELP, and I've tried finding it; however, I keep hitting deadends.

 

Thank you patsgirlboy for responding so thoughtfully.

 

latedalesbian...I picked this username long before I thought about making the posts.

 
September 17, 2008, 3:21 pm CDT

My 4 year old may be a bully!

Hello.  Here's my story and I'm looking for advice.  My 4 year old is starting to become a bully.  He's getting in trouble in preschool for pushing children and when you ask him about he shows no remorse.  I don't know what to do!  I don't want my son to be a bully when he's older and I don't even know where he's getting it from!  I don't want him to be looked at as a bad child or anything like that but I fear he will be.  I've tried many different ways of disciplining and I can't seem to find something that works.  If anyone has any advice I would highly appreciate it!!  Thanks in advance!
 
October 29, 2008, 9:29 am CDT

Bullying and punishment

My 6 year old and her friend were caught bullying a 2nd grader at school.  They pushed a teeter totter down and made the 2nd grader fall off.  The girls then went and hid so the supervisor wouldn't find them.  She found them and they admitted to doing it.  They use a stop light system at their school and they were immediately moved to red.  We also received a behavior report for the day.  She is not one to get in trouble like that.  My husband and I told her that we did not tolerate behavior like that and that she would be punished.  With Halloween on Friday, we told her that she could not go trick or treating.  Do you think this punishment is too harsh?  She is questioning why her friend still gets to trick or treat, but we told her that her friend's parents choose her punishment, not us.  My mom supports whatever we decide, but my dad feels that it is too harsh, since Halloween only comes once a year.  My husband and I are standing by our decision.  We don't want her to think that she can act sassy and then get to do fun things.  They just had a bullying seminar at school last Friday and this is what came of it.  Any suggestions would be greatly appreciated.  The only other thing we thought of doing was to let her go trick or treating, but donate the candy.  It's not a big deal to her, she doesn't like chocolate.  After being told about the no trick or treating, she did not seem to be bothered by the punishment...that's what scares me.
 
October 30, 2008, 8:19 am CDT

My daughter was threaten (direct specific threat) at school and they are doing nothing, what do I do?

In the beginning of the year this kid was doing defensive Pressure Points on the back of my daughters neck. Then my daughter told on a boy for giving her an Indian Rug Burn and he told her that the next time she tells on him he will Twist her neck. I have seen this kid with his hands around another girls neck and he also have extreme behavior problems. We spoke to the principle but he put the blame back on my daughter for not saying anything and when he talk to her, he told her that he, her teacher and I won't always be around to protect her. My daughter is only 7 and scared! What do I do since the school will not punish or do anything about this??

Also The School hand book states that bullying and threats will not be tolerated but it since like they just tolerated it!
I think my next plan is to contact other parent in the class and find out if the same thing has happen to their child. Maybe with more complaints the school might do something. If that doesn't my next step is to get the cops involved and maybe file a restraining order against the child so he can't go to school with her.  I'm I over reacting?
 
November 18, 2008, 9:19 am CST

my friends child becoming a bully

My friends 8 year old son is becoming a bully,  he does not play with my child often because of this.  The problem has become increaseingly evident as we get all the children together for functions, events, etc.  Recently all the boys (7-9 year olds)  were playing basketball and the bully was throwing the others around and pushing them down and being very aggressive.  The mother says nothing, if he hurts another child she does not even ask if the child is okay in fact she tells them if they want to be ballerinas then they should not be playing basketball.  Some other mothers tell their sons to deal with or work it out but it nis not normal play. Sadly enought the children of these other mothers are much smaller than the bully and appears the mothers want to toughen them up.   I feel like maybe I am being to protective but I allow rough play and they do get into it but I donot allow this kind of play or encourage it. .  what should I do????
 
November 18, 2008, 9:33 am CST

Bullies

Quote From: chrisnlori97

My 6 year old and her friend were caught bullying a 2nd grader at school.  They pushed a teeter totter down and made the 2nd grader fall off.  The girls then went and hid so the supervisor wouldn't find them.  She found them and they admitted to doing it.  They use a stop light system at their school and they were immediately moved to red.  We also received a behavior report for the day.  She is not one to get in trouble like that.  My husband and I told her that we did not tolerate behavior like that and that she would be punished.  With Halloween on Friday, we told her that she could not go trick or treating.  Do you think this punishment is too harsh?  She is questioning why her friend still gets to trick or treat, but we told her that her friend's parents choose her punishment, not us.  My mom supports whatever we decide, but my dad feels that it is too harsh, since Halloween only comes once a year.  My husband and I are standing by our decision.  We don't want her to think that she can act sassy and then get to do fun things.  They just had a bullying seminar at school last Friday and this is what came of it.  Any suggestions would be greatly appreciated.  The only other thing we thought of doing was to let her go trick or treating, but donate the candy.  It's not a big deal to her, she doesn't like chocolate.  After being told about the no trick or treating, she did not seem to be bothered by the punishment...that's what scares me.

i FULLY SUPPORT YOUR PUNISHMENT, TREAT HARSH WITH HARSH,  EVEN IF SHE IS NOT FULLY RESPONSIBLE FOR THE SCHOOL INCIDENT ,  THEN SHE WILL HOPEFULLY  NEVER CONSIDER DOING THIS AGAIN OR BEING APART OF IT.  GOOD LUCK! 

 
November 18, 2008, 10:22 am CST

Bullies

Quote From: jaimie1974

I know this is a difficult situation to be in. My advice isnt all that helpful, but it is what I would do; avoid this bully whenever possible. Teach your son to stand up for himself and to diffuse the situation, how to turn a bullying situation around. For example, how to quickly change the subject. It will take practice for your child, but once he learns how to successfully do it, it is a skill he will have for life! Best wishes.
THANK YOU AND VERY GOOD ADVICE FOR MY CHILD, BUT WHAT DO I DO ABOUT MY FRIEND ? DO I SAY ANYTHING, OR NEVER INVITE THEM TO FUNCTIONS ANYMORE?  EITHER WAY SHE WILL BE ANGRY WITH ME.
 
December 5, 2008, 8:23 am CST

You're not over-reacting

Quote From: back2life4ever

In the beginning of the year this kid was doing defensive Pressure Points on the back of my daughters neck. Then my daughter told on a boy for giving her an Indian Rug Burn and he told her that the next time she tells on him he will Twist her neck. I have seen this kid with his hands around another girls neck and he also have extreme behavior problems. We spoke to the principle but he put the blame back on my daughter for not saying anything and when he talk to her, he told her that he, her teacher and I won't always be around to protect her. My daughter is only 7 and scared! What do I do since the school will not punish or do anything about this??

Also The School hand book states that bullying and threats will not be tolerated but it since like they just tolerated it!
I think my next plan is to contact other parent in the class and find out if the same thing has happen to their child. Maybe with more complaints the school might do something. If that doesn't my next step is to get the cops involved and maybe file a restraining order against the child so he can't go to school with her.  I'm I over reacting?

This boy is ovbiously screaming for attention to God knows what that is going on his life. Personally, my first route would be to speak to the parent and offer support. The parent may not even be aware of the situation going on with their own child. I know you must feel like wringing his little neck for her, but remember, these are children. How we react today, by protecting both sides, could hugely save their futures.

 

There is an autistic kid at my son's school that is very violent. The first time I met this kid, we were in a playground and the kid was pushing my son over and over. When I walked over, this kid knocked my books out of my hand and laughed in my face. I pulled him out of my way (because I wasn't sure if he'd hit me when I bent down) and picked up my books and walked away with my son. I was too mad to stay. Later, at a holloween party in school, this same kid pulled my son's feet out from under him while he was on the top of a pair of steps. TG he didn't fall. I talked to his mother and she told me that he was autistic. I really had no idea. The kid has a bunch of older brothers that encourage him to be agressive. Sometimes, knowing the situation can help ease your mind. It doesn't help that feeling of wanting to give their kid a swift kick in the butt, but it does help a little.

 
December 5, 2008, 2:43 pm CST

my son has been bullied all threw school yrs

My son has always been a loner. In grade school they had a secret box outside the office that a student  could put a comment id you see bulling. He put a note in there that said he was being bullied what a brave thing to do when he was younger. Last yr  Jr high his student schedulier was found and given to the principle. He had told some students about a pending suicide, they didn't believe him so he had to pick a date.  then he put in the kind of ways that he could kill his self.  Gun, knife, pills ect... Thank God the principle called us and we were able to get him into counciling and seen our family doctor who put him on depressant med's. Now my son, still doesn't tell us when bulling happens but I know it does.  I now he's afraid to say anything or write it down due to the principle, mom, dad and the councilor, he's a loner he doesn't want problems so he takes it in. His life at home has always been great, he's a really great kid. we don't have problems with behavior but last year scared the hell out of me. He hates school with passion. thats where the bullies are and yes some Teacher can be bullies too. Teacher that yell he has alot of problems with. School needs to be educated. We need classes about bulling just as much or even more than english, and math.  I will do whatever I have to help my son, he's kind, he is full of so much love and understanding. if only the bullies and the yelling teachers knew what they turn my son into a suffering kid in a bully world. I too was bullied at my job and when i went to human resources to complain, I was fired for other reasons. Bullies are everywhere. God Bless all the kids that live with them each and every day.
 
December 6, 2008, 4:54 pm CST

consequences

Parents...... step up, pay attention. There are deadly results for not being aware. This week a 14 year old boy took his own life because we dropped the ball. I personally did not know this boy but he was in my sons 8th grade class. He was being bullied. Growing up I knew what it felt like to be different and made fun of, so when I had kids I taught them that no matter what anyone said it didn't make any difference. What mattered was what they thought of themselves. The great part was that they even found they were strong enough to stand up for others. Unfortunately this boy slipped through the cracks, and now a family is spending this Christmas in mourning. My son is so confused right now. They were all talked to at school, and it made him angry to see those who bullied the boy crying with the rest of the kids. I tried to explain that he cannot condemn those kids, but try to find a reason for their actions. Are they abused at home. Do they live in an atmosphere of hopelessness. Do they feel worthless so they counter that by trying to make others lower than what they feel? Or are they just mean. If thats the case God help us all. We as a nation have lost track of what is important. Children. Plain and simple. Without them there is no future. We must love all our children. We must give them hope, protect them. We must teach them to care about one another. Even tho the people who need to read this probably wont ever see it....... look in the mirror start there....................... PLEASE make difference.
 
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