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Topic : Bullies

Number of Replies: 535
New Messages This Week: 0
Last Reply On:
Created on : Thursday, June 30, 2005, 12:44:13 pm
Author : dataimport
Bullying is far more serious than just name-calling and teasing. It's escalated to include harassment, beatings and even death threats. Share your bully stories, give and get advice from other parents.

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September 13, 2005, 10:47 am CDT

bully

   

   my son came hom yesturday and told me that chynna and brandon where telling people he was gay they bragged about it to him.so deffent people were coming up to him and making rude comments to him.If it is happining to day I will call the school. I can only hope by the time my son makes it ti hight school these two kids drop out.my younger son is not having any problems this year.the bullies have moved on the juonor shci and high school.with my son he is not gay is has a diabiltiy.my house still has the tagging from last years middle students on it.I can seem to get it off any sugjestions for paint.The phone calls haven't started so I am hope ful.I don't know how these kids got to him he is supose to be with a adult at all times.He tries so hard to fit in with other kids but this group of kids is so mean that the good ones have either trnsfered or perents have moved out of town.So he has to be escorted for his own safty.So I plan to find out what went wrong.I pray everday for his day to be a peaceful one.  

 
September 16, 2005, 10:40 am CDT

No bulling so far

   my son has had no problems so far in school.Yea!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! He finally got teachers that have a no talerance policy in thiere class rooms of doing or saing anything botu or to toher kids that upset them or make them feel bad.I can only pray this keeps up.He has been coming home from school in a good mood and so far he has had only one migrane and no sick days.I pray that this contiues through the whole year.He has two boys who like him.One though has a father who is not infarmed about disabilites he said his son is not allowed to cme over to our house or my son not allowed to go over to his cause our son is just to strange for his family.he like his son to be around noraml kids .stuoid hu.What is normal anyway.Dr. phil should do a show on kids with disabilites and the affect other parents have on not lettling thier kids have friends who don't fit into thier idea of normal.bad pearents can cause thier own kids to becaome bullies of kids with disabiolites if they themselves our pregidest aginst them.not every kids fits into a perfict pacage.I have meet alot of parents who juge me on my kids disability.who also judge my son like he has no rights and should not be allowed around thier perfect child it makes me sick.
 
September 24, 2005, 5:43 am CDT

hello to all here this morning

We started to a rocky start here with my daughter and high school .She was bullied quite abit by some kids in her Jr. high school .When she finally got theraphy with her councilor which is going great she started off with a great day in school until she hit the french emmmersion math class .Everyone of the bullies were in that class.ALL her friends were not and all her friends were on a seperate lunch as her so she would have been alone with no one but those bullies on her lunch period so i took mattters in my own hands called the school explained what happened to her in Jr.high school and the principle was so kind he took her put her in another class and she is now on the same lunch as her freinds.But she is in a english math class but will not lose your french dipolma thank god but if she did hey look my daughter's well being comes first and i told her principle that too. I also told him i will be watching also and so help me if one even tries to mess with her well its going to be to bad for their parents not the kids because we can't touch the kids but these parents are the fault to begin with .Where do these kids learn it at home of course .If you go to talk to some of these parents the first thing out of their mouths are well my child don't bully and thats the first indication to me their in denile.I know these parents and i know how hard some of these kids are pushed to be the best at everything and to be the best in class  just to try to live up to their expectations some of these kids can't handle it so they target someone that gets along with everyone and is doing well in school so the revenge seems to be on the ones who excel or that are kind and considerate because these bullies no different way to react.Well this is high school now and if need be some will be going home in a cop car because the school has a zero tolerance for this kinda behavior but its to bad that it has to come to that but we do have to protect our own.My daughter has been doing much better these last few days and i hope it continues.I did post my story near the back now.I think i was the first to post here actually so the story should be near the front if anyone is interested in reading it or maybe i can post it to the front again here to make it easier and give a brief idea as to what she has gone through in her life along with the bullying.I hope all parents fair out well this year with school and especially of course the kids. take care all.cathy
 
September 24, 2005, 5:57 am CDT

hey all this is a bit of what my daughter has gone thorugh this pass year it has some of the bullying in here and some of her troubles dealing with her grandma's death as well so just a old archived board i had wrote on before these new boards were here.c

bullying never easy!!!!!
Posted by: 101160
Posted on: 2005-06-21 10:44:24


Hi ,i don't believe that there are to many people out there that haven't been bullied st one time or another .If you are the chosen few count your blessings.I am a mother of two beautiful girls one is 14&the other is22.When i was young going to school bullying was kids laughing and of course mmaking fun of people who didn't have the right clothes and hair or what not.It hasn't really changed much in 20yrs.It certainly hasn't got better for sure.kids can be so cruel i know my 14 yr old is going through it .She had some problems in elementary grades ,nothing that couldn't be handled .She went on into jr.high and it was the same the same people and same bullying only she is older and hurts easier.I have gone to school because her school has a zero tolerancy for bullying ,so they say.It never really came out in jr.high until a few months ago my daughter started feeling sick alot .She would be up vomiting in the morning knowing she had to go to school.She was taking to the dr.to make sure there wasn't anything more of a physical nature.Which there wasn't.So she was missing school and her friends .She started to decline in school activities and other things she enjoyed to do.Until one morning back in april i got fed up still not knowing i told her she ws going to school and that was final.She began to cry and told me she had no friends.My heart broke as i sat her down to talk to her i told her she had friends because she would hang out at our house or there's.She then told me she was being bullied well i just about died inside and asked why she didn't speak up sooner.Well she didn't want to tell me because she new i would do something about it.So i told her we needed to face these bullies .I went to the school and spoke with the principal and gave her the names and she said the matter would be dealt with Which she did and they were told their name had been brought forward for bullying and were not told the idenity of the child and didn't know i was there either.These people bully so many kids they really didn't know who the kid was that told only i was the kid .HA HA.Regardless i was asked if my daughter wanted to see the guidance councilor .I agreed so she went to school the next day.The councilor called her to the office and asked how she was doing.She proceeded to tell my daughter the bullies have been dealt with and she didn't need to worry.My daughter then broke down and told the councilor that she had attempted suicide.The councilor proceeded to call me in
    part 2
    Posted by:
    101160
    Posted on: 2005-06-21 10:55:56


    to her office and told me that she had attempted suicide .I was floored.She thentold me it was my daughters grandmother that she is grieving over because she died last october,and my daughter was close to her.My daughter had told me then that she thought if her grandmother had died well there wasn't alot of hope for her ,so she thought she should die too.The bullying was making her feel worst and she couldn't holdit in anymore.I give thanks everyday that the councilor took her in and talked to her.because in my daughters eyes everything was ten times worst, and then she started to defend the bullies to a certain extent.She new she was being made fun of at times but she now realizes they have no power over her and she knows she can now defend herself.She is so much stronger now and attends counciling and a grief support group for teens.She can't wait to attend high school this fall.I thank god everynight for our beautiful girl back.Oh she even has stood up to bullies to defend others who don't think they can.Good luck to all parents and their children and i hope god keeps yours safe
 
September 27, 2005, 11:49 am CDT

I e p working

  

  

     My son has had some bulling problems this year but not to the extent as last year.He calls me on the phone from school.Then I call the councelor and ask her what is going on and with what child.She tell me and I can  get a good perspectinve of what really happend by both stories then I ask what is being done to make sure that this does not happen agian.In all casses she has been right on top of each situation.I do think that my being on top of the school and kowing what is happening and what they are doing to stop and fix each situation helps.In all cases the child did not bother him a second time.Which makes me very happy.They think Iam to involved in his school life and need to let him solve his own problems .I am quike to pint out that when I did that in the past he was bullied on a daily basis hated school and became depessed.That this year he is not being bullied everyday the kids that do causes him problems are being quikly taken care of.He is happy likes school and his teachers and has made al least one friend.which is a big improvement over last year and years before..But this is only september I pray everyday for him to have a peaceful day at achool.My other two childeren are having good years also this year the youngest is having a problem being on time to class.my daughter is getting a and b fo for i pray for them as well.I keep all of you in my pryers each day and hope you can have a resolution to you bulling problems. 

 
September 27, 2005, 3:07 pm CDT

debrasatt

Quote From: debrasatt

  

  

     My son has had some bulling problems this year but not to the extent as last year.He calls me on the phone from school.Then I call the councelor and ask her what is going on and with what child.She tell me and I can  get a good perspectinve of what really happend by both stories then I ask what is being done to make sure that this does not happen agian.In all casses she has been right on top of each situation.I do think that my being on top of the school and kowing what is happening and what they are doing to stop and fix each situation helps.In all cases the child did not bother him a second time.Which makes me very happy.They think Iam to involved in his school life and need to let him solve his own problems .I am quike to pint out that when I did that in the past he was bullied on a daily basis hated school and became depessed.That this year he is not being bullied everyday the kids that do causes him problems are being quikly taken care of.He is happy likes school and his teachers and has made al least one friend.which is a big improvement over last year and years before..But this is only september I pray everyday for him to have a peaceful day at achool.My other two childeren are having good years also this year the youngest is having a problem being on time to class.my daughter is getting a and b fo for i pray for them as well.I keep all of you in my pryers each day and hope you can have a resolution to you bulling problems. 

Hi i just wanted to wish you well with your son and school.Yes someyimes its good if we can let the kids resolve this on their own but at the same time keep an eye on the situation also.I wish your other children well as well . take care.cathy  
 
September 30, 2005, 1:04 pm CDT

My younger son

  

  My youger son is in trouble at school I recived a call from the councelor today that he has been bothering two girls at school just followeing them around and keeps tring to talk to them they had told him they do not want him around them and to go away.Well he didn't.So I got a call I don't want him bothering them if they do not want him to be arond them So I will have a nice chat with him to night.I was told if he does not stop he will be in detetion then in suspention.I don't understand him why would he hang aroung kids who don't want him there.I ironic thing is .I that this is the younger sister to to group of boys who were bulling my older son who has autisim.They tagged my house and made prank phone calls and the father chased my son on several occations down the street cause he was afraid his kids would catch my son problem I had to call the cops this summer on them.So you see I don't need this kind of problem.If anybody has any sugjestions please let me know I just want it to stop and don't want him to be aqused or become a bully.I really don't want any dealings with this crazy family at all.The husband is a real nut case.please help.I have tried to talk to him on one accation and it was not a good experince for me I don't need any problems this year how can I get through to me son that if kids ask him to leave he must not bother them any more. he has an iep to.Sometimes it is like talking to someone who does not understand. 

 
October 2, 2005, 6:35 am CDT

A Word from a former teacher

Quote From: debrasatt

     

   

    well school has been in for a week and he has had no problems with kids.He is well protected from them.Thier was a incedent the second day in one of his classes and the young men were asked to leave and not come back.She had them trnsfed out.The girl who got him into so much trouble last year by leing to keep herself from trouble was warned off when she started at him. She started off by tring to talk to him and he told her that every time im nice to you you get me in trouble so don't talk to me.So she said I guess you want trouble  I can give it to you.He ignored her.She tried and got into trouble her self.I can only hope this goes well for the year.talk later.  

I will be watching this and I hope the school continues to monitor this bully. 

  

After over 30 years teaching in lower elementary and Middle Schools please know some, MOST, teachers care very much.  I hoped there would be some answer for us before I retired, but I haven't seen one so far.  Individual teachers are quite restricted as to what we can do.  It seems that most bullies also have bully-parents.  Contacting the parents only makes things worse, but we did it time after time, and suffered being bullied by parents ourselves.  We often walked bullies to class ourselves to protect the other children.  It wasn't much, but we hoped it helped during school hours.  It seemed better than embarassing the bullied children by walking them.   

  

Girls seemed to be harder to catch.  Middle School students seem quite careless about their personal notes and we would often find whole notebooks full of horrid exchanges among "friends".  Although we were restricted from acting on most notes if there were threats we could turn the notes in.   

  

In the years since I retired (2001) police are being involved more and more in school crime.  This still sets bully-parents into attack-mode, but many teachers are taking that risk.   

  

I watch all programs dealing with bullies hoping each time that a way to stop them will be found.  Among the teachers in my family (3 active, 2 retired) and my many teacher-friends, we feel this is the number 1 problem. 

 
October 5, 2005, 10:44 am CDT

a school policy

 My younger son has been in after scool detention several times not because he has done anything bad it is because he was 1 nim to 3 sec. late for class he tries really hard.he has a iep to.the new policy goes like this you have to be in your class 5 min. before class starts no execptions.There are not bell to warn kids.you have to figure ti out for your self.O.M.S just tarted this policy this year they re taking it to the extrem.it doesn't mater if you are one sec late they are to report the child and they get three hyours after school detention many are seving time.including my son.I understand kids need to be on time but this is cause my son bit physical problems he is so afraid of being late that he sets up his things and has statred checking and re checking them and won't eat lunch so he won't be late but he was 3 sec. late for class and has to report to detention on thurday for three hours after school.Does any body else thinkthis has gone to far.I was called by his teacher and told he will be in detention for thre hours this thurday cause he had to report it when I ask how late he was he said 3sec.He said the late time he was 1min..When I questioned the p about this policy he told me he thinks it is very fair to the kids he won't tolerate late ess of any kind no matter what.even if if is by 1sec. so i asked if he holds the teachers to the same policy he shut up.I know he does not cause he has never shown up to a iep meeting himself and some teachers don't or are late they just sighn the papers later.Al least he was never at my older sons meeting.does any body else think this poilcy has gone to far.I am thinkeng about redoing his iep so this isnot an ussue for him.anybady have any sujections on how t5o write it so my son can have some peace of mind and not such fear that he is worring all the time.I think scchool can become bullies them selves with polices that are really dumb.
 
October 5, 2005, 11:03 am CDT

pullies

Quote From: trublulu

I will be watching this and I hope the school continues to monitor this bully. 

  

After over 30 years teaching in lower elementary and Middle Schools please know some, MOST, teachers care very much.  I hoped there would be some answer for us before I retired, but I haven't seen one so far.  Individual teachers are quite restricted as to what we can do.  It seems that most bullies also have bully-parents.  Contacting the parents only makes things worse, but we did it time after time, and suffered being bullied by parents ourselves.  We often walked bullies to class ourselves to protect the other children.  It wasn't much, but we hoped it helped during school hours.  It seemed better than embarassing the bullied children by walking them.   

  

Girls seemed to be harder to catch.  Middle School students seem quite careless about their personal notes and we would often find whole notebooks full of horrid exchanges among "friends".  Although we were restricted from acting on most notes if there were threats we could turn the notes in.   

  

In the years since I retired (2001) police are being involved more and more in school crime.  This still sets bully-parents into attack-mode, but many teachers are taking that risk.   

  

I watch all programs dealing with bullies hoping each time that a way to stop them will be found.  Among the teachers in my family (3 active, 2 retired) and my many teacher-friends, we feel this is the number 1 problem. 

 I know  about parents who are bullies I have run into alot of those where I live.one chased my son down the street.he was about forty and lives just down the street from us.he said he didn't want my retarted son hanging around his house or talking to his kids cause he didn't want his kids to cautch my sons retartedness.He really scared even me.his wife was standing behind him like she was embaressed and afraid at the same time.I got bold and look stright at her and siad glad hes yours not mine I would have left him a long time ago.and walked of I know I probalby should has said nothing but I was so mad.My house was tagged last year I had lots of prank phone calls also last year.It was not a fun year last year at all.This  school year has gone better for my older son.Oackland bay seems to have it act together this year better then oms does.I have made it a policy to call the cops evertime something happens at the house or to my kids.even if the cops do nothing I have made an effort and their is a reoprt on file wtih them.know my younger son is at oms and having  problems with kids talking behind his back and being afriad to be late for class even 1sec can get you detention he worrys all the time about it.to the point he isn't eatin luch from wht he tells me he sometimes gets a pece of pizza and runs to class.he still is late by on or two sec. no bells to warn kids they have to guess.what should i do the teacher is erquied to report kids.so many are seving time detentions is three hours after school.I teid to talk to the p but got kow where he bvelives this is very fair to the kids.but when asked if whe holds his teachers to the same standered wouldn't answer me.I do belive kids need to be on time but this is to much.I can understand being in trouble for being 5 min. late but sec or a min is just to much.
 
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