Topic : Good Parenting

Hi All,
  I am writing to you with some very scary information.  This started yesterday when I took my 5 year old daughter to Mc Donalds after school (this is our Monday thing).  I pulled the toy out of the bag before giving her her food, and when I saw the toy I was absolutely disgusted!  They are currently including toys called "W.I.T.C.H.", which is aboth a comic book and Disney Channel series, that depicts young girls practicing REAL WITCHCRAFT, not the Halloween playtime stuff.  Here is a link to the characters on Disney channel:
 http://tv.disney.go.com/jetix/witch/games/witchteamrescue/index.html

I am not a religious nut, but I believe in good and evil, right  and wrong, so I have to say something.
  This is just not acceptable to be geared at little girls!  Please make this information available. and contact your local McDonalds or their corporate office- McDonalds.com

Ummm, is there such a thing a "Real witchcraft?" I'm not trying to open the flood gates to a huge debate over religion/spirituality... but, how many witches do you know? Yes, some might ague that there are some forms of modern day witch craft (e.g. wicken). And fine people ought to let them think what they want to think, but even if you know someone who claims to be a witch... anyone ever seen them actually do anything? I'm going to take a wild guess and say no. Do I think it's a good idea? No, but then again neither will most people, and in that case it will just go down as another Disney cartoon failure.  

  

Beside, where do we draw the line? Frankly kids are being exposed to FAR worse things that "Witches." Again, I don't mean to open up a huge debate, but we ought to be more concerned that children are being exposed to crap like "Fity (50) Cent" and shows that "normalize" things like divorce (e.g. Gilmore Girls) something that has CERTAINLY contributed to such a high divorce rate in this country. I think we got far bigger things to worry about.  

Hi, I am new to this so please bear with me. 

I need some help on whether or not kids should get an allowance or be paid for chores they do at home or in the yard. ( They are 12, 8, & 9) 

Right now my kids keep track of the jobs they do around the house and at the end of each month we total it up and they are paid. They always put it in thier bank account and take it out as they need it. 

I have some friends who give their kids and allowance, same amount, each month with no strings attached, and some who just give out money when it is needed.  

I want to teach my kids the value of a dollar, and how to use it properly. 

Any ideas on how to handle the new problem. My oldest now asks how much she will get paid when asked to do a job.  

I seems sometimes as though parenting is a never ending struggle of always trying to do the right thing.  

Any and all help will be appreciated. 

Thanks. Angie 

It seems to me that you have fallen into the belief that witches are bad.  Remember the good witch off of Wizard of Oz?  What exactly makes you disgusted?  And what was scary?  And what was evil?  I'm sure your daughter seeing you react to that will only make her feel the same way you do.  And please, it's a cartoon, not the end of the world.  Today's society has made the witch seem this way and it seems the only time a witch can be seen is on Halloween, all ugly and old.  I am not a witch, I do not practice Wicca.  I am of the Old Ways and when I see parents always teaching their children that witches are bad or scary or evil it breaks my heart, for a "witch" in the old days was a healer.  A midwife.  She would help heal people with herbs.  Do you think doctors are evil when they are saving lives?  These are our modern day witches.

I personally do not believe children should be paid for every little chore that they do in the home for it is their home just as it is any one elses. My children are still very young but they do have chores and they do get money. They get a dime for their banks when ever they do certain things but on days when it is the family cleaning day, they do not get money. I don't have a problem wiith a set amount weekly or monthly, whatever the parents decide, and I don't see a problem with giving kids money for something that they need as long as they are being taught the value of money and learning respect and responsibility as well as to know the difference between wants and needs. They need to learn that money does not grow on trees and it isn't going to hurt them to save some and to buy something for them selves. If they expect handouts and no accountability then they will not succeed as adults. Parents need to set the boundaries and rules of the home and stick with them. I think kids need to learn that some things we just don't get paid for, it isn't going to hurt a kid to fix their own bed or feed the dog and wash dishes, whatever the issue might be. If it were me, and my daughter expected to get paid for every little thing, I would proabably say something like, "you will get your money at the end of the week and if you do not do this chore then I will deduct money from your allowance." Someday, she is gonna be on her own and live in her own home, then what? who is going topay her then? Got to set those boundaries and go with it.

Whatever, I guess this could be considered "right to free speech" and if she and others are offended then they have the right to voice this. I personally will not allow my children to have the toy either, just like there will be absolutely no Harry Potter items in my home either. It is all in how we see things. In fact, we don't even celebrate Halloween becasue it only encourages our kids to go to strrrangers and ask for candy and it is about scary and evil, just look at the decorations. My children will never step foot in a haunted house becasue it is redicoulous. My point is, every one of us have our views and opinions and have the right to feel as we do, like some think that Halloween is nothing but fun, I think it needs to be banned, in the same way that this lady is against the with stuff, others might think it is ok, to each their own.

I am glad that you are instilling your values and beliefs into your children. However, what about teaching them to be respectful and tollerant of other cultures and beliefs? I understand your apprehenshion towards Halloween, I too feal that it has become very comercialized and far from it's original roots as a last harvest festival and day to remember our ancestors. In regards to Harry Potter and other forms of media I highly doubt that as your children get older you will be able to censor all items that do not meet your approval. They must be prepared to make their own judgements and be respectful to others when making those judgements. This country is full of varried and distinct cultures that have the same rights to practice their beliefs with the same courtesy that the main stream groups expect. We try to instill in our children that there are many different paths in life that people take and many different belief systems out there and they need to respect and acknowlage each and every one with the same courtesy that they expect of others. Good parenting involves being proactive with your children in regards to tolarance of other cultures and beliefs, and the parents set the example. 

  

I teach my children biblical values and morals and to respect others but at the same time to stand up for what they believe regardless of what others might think. it is my responsibility as the parent of my children to teach and to guide them in the way they should go and to teach actions come with consequences whether good or bad. My children are growing up in a Christian home and I will teach them as I see fit. They will eventually be out on their own and it is my hope and prayers that they will make wise decissions on how they live their lives. I am not prejudice against cultures but that does not mean that I have to go along with everything that others believe and what they practice. My post that was geared toward the witch post has nothing to do with speaking against other cultures and tolerance but encouraging to stick with our own convictions and not feeling that we have to be politically correct with society. Now, if a person wants to go out and practice witch craft that is their choice but I am not going to tell my kids that it is an ok thing to do as well as other things that I am against and I will back my beliefs with scripture and convictions as well as experiences in my life. I will not encourage my children to participate in something that is evil and against my faith as a christian as well as a mother, for that would be like me living one way but teaching another. No need to worry about my children when it comes to others and cultures, I have worked with several different cultures including those who worship buddah, but you bet, they knew better then to come to me and ask me to go worship with them but at the same time we respected each other, I never once have told these people that they were going to hell or whatever but I did not hesitate to tell them that I feel that they are worshipping a false God, therefore that is why I could never go with them. tolerance is loving and respecting others but at the same time not feeling pressured to conform, and this is what I will be teaching my kids. Some things just will not enter my home and as my children grow and mature, I will expect them to follow the rules of the home which is called respect and when they become adults they can decide how they want to live their lives and what they decide will be completely up to them as they will have been given the tools and info and such that they need and what they do with their teachings and up bringings is absolutely up to them. I am against witch craft and I expect things to do with that to be kept out of my home, it has nothing to do with tolerance of another person's belief. Believe me, I am the best parent, teacher and example for my children, I have been a part of "the world" and i know what is out there and I will do everything that I can to help my children grow in to good, mature adults and to encourage them to love, respect and be tolerarte of others but at the same time, not to give in to things just becasue society accepts it. We are ling in an everything goes society and my children have the right to know that not all things are right though society has a way of making them look like they are. Good parenting is loving and caring for our children and teaching and guiding them in to becoming good and productive adults, respecting and being honest and open with them and teaching them the difference between right and wrong, to encourage them to follow their hearts and making choices that will help them become the people that they are meant to be, and that is what me and my husband are doing. We also need to live by example and not be hypocritical in our teachings and able to back up our beliefs and teachings with answers and resources, being there for our children through ups and downs. I could go on and on with this but don't have the time.

I know a family who home schooled their children and talk about sheltering! The only kids they were pretty well around were homeschoolers and they attended church but one with no strong children/teen programs. They did a lot of family outings but not a whole lot that involved kids their ages. Parties were limited pretty much to family members and the kids didn't go out much with friends, mostly family. I could go on but that is what sheltering is about, not getting your kids out in society to meet and to make friends and to develop into their own beings.............................................................Now, I am not speaking against home schooling as We are looking at that as well but for some one to accuse another parent, an active parent with active and socialable kids at that, as being sheltered just because of a conviction or disbelief and disagreement in something to me is very judgemental. I personally did not speak against one single parent particpating in an activity but spoke my opinion about the activity so that makes me a parent who shelters her kids? Well, honestly, after rereading my last post, I do realize how lucky I am to have the fun loving and kind kids that I do and the way my husband and I are raising them has absolutely no negative affects on them. Now, if I were teaching them that watching tv every hour of the day and that they are free to watch every program that looks like it would be ok, and if I were encouraging them to stay inside and not go out and play with friends and not have fun at an activity, and If I were keeping them away from the poor and sick becasue I am afraid of them getting whatever, then I would have to agree that I was sheltering my kids. But I thank God that I am not that type of parent and yes, you could say that I am offended becasue I am being accused of sheltering my kids all over the fact that I or my family do not celebrate a holiday which I have spoken against even though all of us are against something and teach and guide our kids according to our beliefs and life styles, I guarentee that I am not the only parent here that teaches and guides according to beliefs and style. We may disagree on topics but that doen't have anything to do with whether or not we are sheltering our kids. ...........................................................Well, I need to go now as I need to get to bed for tomorrow is a big day as the girls and I are going to a big/all day Christmas activity at the church. Games, friends, food, crafts, lots and lots of fun. Have a great weekend every one.