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Topic : 07/26 The Dr. Phil Foundation Helping Kids

Number of Replies: 153

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Created on : Friday, April 07, 2006, 10:15:10 am

Author : DrPhilBoard1

(Original Air Date: 04/14/06) The McGraw family and The Dr. Phil Foundation share a passion for supporting children in need and those in foster care. Meet some wonderful people who've opened their hearts and their wallets to help underprivileged children across the nation. Elaine is a 35-year-old single mother who has been a foster mom to over 50 kids. Her mission is to give unconditional love and support to every child who shows up on her doorstep, especially the hard-to-place children. She founded TYME ministries, an organization dedicated to meeting the needs of disadvantaged youth. See the amazing surprises Dr. Phil and Robin have for Elaine! Then, Zakiya recently became too old to qualify for foster care, and is desperate for a support network to help her stay on her feet. Plus, an inner-city teen sings the blues because her school's music program doesn't have the resources to help her reach her goals. Dr. Phil introduces her to someone who wants to help her become the shining star she was born to be. Share your thoughts, join the discussion.

Find out what happened on the show.

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bikermom

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April 17, 2006, 10:40 pm PDT

SOME FOR GOOD

SOME KIDS NEED TO BE TAKEN FROM THERE MOMS AND DADS BUT THE PLACES THAT PUT THEM CAN BE JUST AS BAD AND THEN THESE KIDS NEED HELP MENTAL HELP AND AFTER THERE OUT OF STATES CARE FOLLOW UP ON THEM MAKE SHER THERE OK DON'T JUST SAY YOUR FREE BYE THESE KIDS HAVE BEEN TO HELL AND BACK AND IT STICKS AS A ADULT I KNOW IF I HAD GOT THE HELP I NEEDED AS A KID I WOULD NOT BE THE HEAD CASE I AM NOW AND HAVE 4 KIDS THAT I AM HOPING AND PRAYING THAT I DID NOT SCREW UP TO BAD I GOT GOOD KIDS BUT IT WAS A HIGHER POWER THAT HAS SAVED THEM WITH NO MOM TO TEACH ME TO BE A MOM THERE DADS NOT AROUND YES YOU SEE WHAT THE PARENTS CALLED THE STATE OF TN RAISED ME LIKE 4 KIDS 3 DADS THAT IS NOT RIGHT I KNOW THAT NOW BUT NOW IS TO LATE I AM JUST NOW GOING BACK TO SCHOOL THY DID NOTMAKE ME STAY IN SCHOOL SO DR.PHIL IF YOU CAN HELP IF I CAN HELP WITH MY STORY TO CHANGE THINGS LETS DO IT BECAUSE D.H.S HERE IS BAD AND IF FOSTER PARENT ARE IN IT FOR THE MONEY AT LEAST LIKE KIDS

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jettav

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April 17, 2006, 10:55 pm PDT

Foster parents

need to be screened every so often as wella s the children questioned in some form of what goes onint her homes. Maybe things have changed since the 70's but back then as far as I can tell, once a foster parent had good standing in the system, they were automattically a good parent, I say NOT TRUE. I should know, cause I was abused in my foster home of ten years and looking back as an adult, the signs were there, I over heard little comments from people within the home as well as to the social workers. These oarents had taken care of foster kids for many years and he was in his 60's when I left the home, thankfully my brother and I were the last kids in their care, but maybe if we would have been questioned and them screened some how, things would have been different, yes, they had a good name int he community as well as the system, but they were lousy foster parents, at least towards the end.......I am not against fostering as there are many kids out there in need of a good, stable and loving home, I just believe the system can use some improvements when placing these kids.

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jamesstein

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April 18, 2006, 5:14 am PDT

04/14 The Dr. Phil Foundation Helping Kids

Quote From: jettav

need to be screened every so often as wella s the children questioned in some form of what goes onint her homes. Maybe things have changed since the 70's but back then as far as I can tell, once a foster parent had good standing in the system, they were automattically a good parent, I say NOT TRUE. I should know, cause I was abused in my foster home of ten years and looking back as an adult, the signs were there, I over heard little comments from people within the home as well as to the social workers. These oarents had taken care of foster kids for many years and he was in his 60's when I left the home, thankfully my brother and I were the last kids in their care, but maybe if we would have been questioned and them screened some how, things would have been different, yes, they had a good name int he community as well as the system, but they were lousy foster parents, at least towards the end.......I am not against fostering as there are many kids out there in need of a good, stable and loving home, I just believe the system can use some improvements when placing these kids.

The problem is DSS steals so many children that they complain they dont have time to go see them, I have signed documentation from the case worker stating just that.. It is in my case file where she complains about her 48 children on her caseload and she dont have the time to visit the foster homes..

Fact is if DSS would stop stealing, lying, and cheating the system would not have half the problems it has.. Over 80% of the children in foster care are there due to false reports or lies.. Yes some children are abused but that number is nowhere near 1 Million. Those many many children that are not abused by their "real parents" 90% of the time they will be abused in foster care in some form or another.

Our daughter was abused for 10 months straight in the same foster home, we filed complaints left and right and every single time DSS said " The foster parent is highly recommended by her church and people in the community". Even complaints where filed with the State Of South Carolina itself and the top head director ignored these complaints...

As far as questioning a child, DSS tells a child what to say and if the child does try to tell the truth they are punished (beaten or slapped mostly), moved to another home, and papers are given to the courts that the children lie and steal..

This system needs shut down all together and a 100% new and different system needs to be in place. The entire system is corrupt from the case workers to the foster parents. Greed is a powerful thing and when money is involved there will always be greed..

James C. Stein Sr.

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momof17

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April 18, 2006, 10:04 am PDT

foster parents

Dr. Phil,

I just wanted to say thank you for putting foster care in a good light. Any time I've seen anything about the foster care system it's been bad. We're a foster family and have been doing foster care for over 5 years and have had 17 kids placed in our care, plus the ones that are only here for a night or two. We have loved everyone of them and wish we could do more. Thank you for putting it out there that there are families who are trying to help heal the broken homes and to keep the children safe.

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momof17

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April 18, 2006, 10:13 am PDT

04/14 The Dr. Phil Foundation Helping Kids

Quote From: cherrioduc

I love you selah!

fostermother of 59

YES!!! I agree if more people would step up instead uf complaining things would go alot easier for all the children

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jamesstein

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April 18, 2006, 11:27 am PDT

04/14 The Dr. Phil Foundation Helping Kids

Quote From: momof17

YES!!! I agree if more people would step up instead uf complaining things would go alot easier for all the children

Well if you sat there and raised your bio children for years and they never had any issues at all and was taken care of and then DSS came in and kidnapped them would you still feel the same way ???

Our children was never abused until DSS and the Foster Care system came along. It is a proven fact not a complaint..

How would you like to almost loose everything you own just to keep up with the child support and then see your children in ripped up cloths, dirty, smelly, unkept ... ??? How you like to slammed left and right by DSS in a court of law and you did nothing wrong and your lawyers do nothing ???

How would you like to see your children in the hospital with IV Needles running out of their arms and so sick they can barely hold up their head ???

You talk about complaints but yet you know nothing of what really goes on, as I said before dont judge a "real parent" unless you know all the facts.. If more people would step up to show the entire truth of what really happens and if the government would cut all those benefits out of their 285 BILLION DOLLAR (This budget is climming higher and higher every year) budget then things would go alot better.. If DSS would stop kidnapping children then things would go alot better, gee just thing if DSS was stopped from stealing all those children there would be no need for all those foster parents, would there ?? Oh thats what you dont want, isnt it ??

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just_joy

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April 18, 2006, 11:27 am PDT

Trying to get in touch with Elaine

I am new to this site but have been a watching the show from the start and believe that so many positive things come from the help that he is able to give. I was touched by this show and live in New Jersey and the same town as Elaine and I am trying to find a way to get in touch with her to see if I can lend a helping hand whatever way she may need. I have called 411 for Tyme Youth Center information and came up empty as with all search engines I have tried on-line and I was wondering if anyone had any idea of how I may get in touch with her. Please email me at joy_mpezeni@excite.com

Thank you

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golden1

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April 18, 2006, 3:58 pm PDT

04/14 The Dr. Phil Foundation Helping Kids

Quote From: chiefcook

there is never a "benefit" to siblings being separated in foster care BUT there are just not enough homes. if you have a call for 3 siblings and you only have one bed open then you do what you can but you can't do it all. the problem is that not enough people want to give their time and energy to these children. too many people say "i dont want to get attached and then they send them home". as dr. phil would say "it's not about you".all of these people need to get some education on the impact it has on these children when they are separated from their family. even when the biological family is abusive or neglectful, this is the only worl they know. the primary goal in foster care is reunification with their biological family and if this is not possible then rights are terminated to enable adoption. my husband and i have been foster parents for over 8 years and have adopted 4 children ( 2 sets of siblings). i am sad when i see people go out of the country to adopt children when there are plenty of children right in their backyard who need a loving home. if everyone would quit saying "these poor kids" and take at least 1-2 children in their home we could make a difference.

i think dr. phil should also do a show on adoptive parents who have promised these children a forever home and then changed their mind and the kids are right back in the system. the numbers are frightening.

I believe that the reason a lot of adoptive parents adopt outside of the country is because the system over here makes it extremely difficult to adopt. You see, as long as a child is in foster care, someone is getting money; the case worker, the supervisors, but not the child. Once the child leaves the foster care system, no more money. Sometimes, the biological parent(s) can put up enough roadblocks to make adoption impossible. The National Association of Black Social Workers won't allow Black children to be adopted by non-traditional families; hence the high percentage of African-American children in foster care until age 18.

Often, judges make bad decisions by not only not terminating the parental rights of an abusive parent or parents, but also by placing the child back into an abusive household. An unwed mother-to-be will often put her child up for adoption, fill out the papers, even receive free room, board and medical care from the prospective parents, only to "change her mind" at the last minute. All the adoptive parents have left are a bunch of bills, an empty nursery and broken hearts. With that much frustration, it's not surprising that so people go outside of the U.S. to adopt.

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kelbel2u

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April 18, 2006, 5:52 pm PDT

it sucks to be you!

Quote From: cherrioduc

Lady you don't know a thing about Foster Care!

What do you pay for an 8 hour daycare? IF you're lucky maybe 30 to 40 dollars per day.per child. Now, in my state fostercare is an average of $17.50 per day per child. My limit for children, as I am a single parent, is 4 children . Thats $70 per day, that pays for diapers,baby wipes,(I just love having 4 kids in diapers) babyfood, toddler foods, etc, gas for 2 to 4 doctors visits per week. I can't afford a baby sitter, much less find one for 4 small children, so I have to Take them ALL with me. A one hour doctor visit turns into 3 hours, dentist, eye exams, extras for school for the older ones, personal items for the teens, etc. My grocery bill is $200 or more a week (thats 3 days pay)

Lady you haven't a clue. I get up at 5:30 am and I don't stop until I fall into bed at 9pm. I don't go out except for the kids or their school activities,

I haven't had my hair done in 5 years, never had a pedicure or a facial, my clother are bought on Ebay or at Salvation army. I struggle every month to pay my mortgage and high heating bills.

Hey, walk in my shoes for a month, dirty diapers and all, THEN tell me about all the money I make!

People like you are the biggest problem Fostercare has, your only action is your mouth. Ah yes, thats called the "Peter Principle"

seems like you have PLENTY of time to sit your butt at a computer & try to get some sympathy from me! if you want to make sacrifices in your life, then do it. don't come back at me with your "walk in MY shoes" attitude. if you really are the self-less person you say you are, then i say THANK YOU with all my heart and soul. this message board is not for martyrs, and i was only voicing what i personally have found out on my own in this situation. as for all the others who have voiced THEIR opinion about ME, it took me 2 months to even FIND my nephew when he was taken into custody, and by then, he was already in this stinking system so far that i couldn't get him out if i wanted to! so all of you reading this can go back to your "lives". just because my experience with foster care is not a glorious as yours, means absolutely NOTHING. get it??

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michael115

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April 18, 2006, 6:09 pm PDT

somebody or anybody help me out

can anybody tell me a phone number to call to find out if the show received a video tape that i sent dr.phil last year,if anyone knows a phone number please post it or how do i go about finding out,do i email them or what?please help god bless sincerely michael

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