Topic : Step-Parenting

i have been with my fiance for just over 3 years now. he has 2 kids from a previous realationship aged 12 and 9, we also have a 2year boy together, his ex is mental and is really nasty. when i meet my partner he did not have his kids and shortly after she allowed him to see them again. the kids were 9 and 5 when i meet them. they were monsters no worse than monsters! we now have the boy 12 living with us, and his attitude has improved since he has been with us. the girl 9 lives with her mother, i thought everything was starting to go well but that just shows how stupid i am. in the last few months when we have the girl at our house she lies, steals and aggrivates her brothers.

i lost it at the two kids for the first time yesterday, i yelled and told them they were a pair of ungrateful little shits and that they better hurry up and pull their heads in before i kicked them both out of our house forever, what made me lose it was that i organized for proffesional photos of them to be taken for their dads birthday. when the photographer was doing her job they wouldnt sit still or stand where she told them to then to top it off the wouldnt smile and started arguing with each other the lady turned around and said to them that she found it easier to work with 2yr olds than them. i got soooooo made, this was costing us a pretty penny or two. i am so sick of the girl aggrivating her brothers and lying, stealing and throwing major tantrums i am at the point where i dont ever want to see her again, her father my husband is even had enough and thats saying something as he is very tolerant. please if any one knows what we should do please tell me, i feel as though i have tried evrything. and i just feel like giving up, this girl shows no remorse for anything she does. help please!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I need help. Please!!! 

Me and my fiance had moved in togehter with our kids about a year ago. I have my 4 year old daughter from my previous merriage and  my faince has his 4 year old son from his previous merriage. We had no problem getting the kids adjusted to each other. They love each other. The problem is that they bot don't appreciate what we are doing for them. We have custody of both kids. So school/work and dicepline is being all done at our house and the fun on the weekends is taken by their other parents. Whaterver we do for our kids is just not enough, but then they come home from the weekends and brag about the littelt hings their parents got for them. In the begining we kind of wanted to top whatever they would say they got. The kids are being spoiled left and right, and me and my fiance have always been about discepline and routine. They get anything they want with us, or at least we think so. We have tried taking things away just to show them what it would be like when they don't have them, there were times when we got them anything under the sun just to show them that they will get anything they want. Over the past year we have tried everything, but still nothing works. What bothers us is that they don't ever say thank you unless we tell them they have to, even if i get them what they want they show no emotions at all as if i was supposed to get that and that's final. When the get back from their parents houses they brag about the littlest things ever, they seem so happy to have gotten them. I know that they appreciate their other parents more, i have seen it, or at least they show it to them more than us.  

Few examples: I went out shopping for my step son yesterday. Got him a huge bag of new summer clothes. When i came home he would not even look at anything. Along with everything he got a new pair of shoes. No thank you. This morning he insisted that he put on the shoes his mother got for him.   

Also yesterday i asked my daughter why is she so happy when her daddy is around, and seems do down when she has to come home. She said well mommy daddy buys me anything I want and that's what makes me happy. The man literally buys her whatever she wants.  

Are we being jealous here? Why can't they see what we do for them, but then again brag the other parents. We never tried to show off, or make them feel like we have more to offer. They are almost 5 now and it just seems that things are getting worse and worse. If anything we show them what's right and good in their lives. Willt his ever end. Will they ever see what we are doing for them?  

Please help.  

How old is this child? One way to get them to stop is by not letting them drink anything after they eat supper. We are doing this with our 5 y/o and so far it is working. Also right before bed, take him/her to the potty. Very rarely does my daughter wet her bed anymore. Also, if they continue to wet alot, or drink alot (staying thirsty all the time), or  complain with head aches, stomach aches, and bad vision, then have them checked out for diabeties. My son is a diabetic and he used to wet his bed all the time and stayed thirsty, before we found out he had this.