Topic : 07/24 Teen Dating and Abuse

  A princess  is standing in all her beauty and finery ......beautiful she stands ........holding a big green frog......she says   

BUT JOHN, I THOUGHT YOU SAID YOU'D TURN INTO A PRINCE?   

The big green frog replies ........   

GROW UP MARY, WELCOME TO THE REAL WORLD !   

SEE IT AND STOP IT...........a web site reference on teen dating and abuse.  

www.seeitandstopit.org  

There is a difference between a good relationship and a bad one.  

Abuse is a choice that the abuser makes willfully.  

CHECK OUT THIS WEB SITE. 

I do not exactly trust men.  My mother dated my father through high school and married him after college.  When I was little my father was verbally abusive and divorced my mother for a prettier chick.  He can still be manipulative and viscious when the mood strikes him although he has matured quite a bit and it happens rarely.   

Additionally, I went to a school where there were fewer guys than gals.  Consequently there was a lot of mayhem as couples broke up and reformed.  Dating may have been fun when it was working but all of the tears I saw after makes me think that remaining friends and not going exclusive would have been a better move.  Some friendships were permanently destroyed.  These were friendships that had existed for over ten years.  What is so great about that? 

I am sure dating can be wonderful, but with teen girls you need to make sure it is not all consuming.  It is too easy for a gal in such an insecure time of life to get too wrapped up in the dating scene and not cultivate her other interests and talents.  Trust me here, her passions will likely last longer than her boyfriend.  My horse is far more loyal than any of my friends and brings me far less stress.  He has also taught me a h#!! of a lot about life. 

for someone who hasn't ever dated i think that this is a poor one sided response. Dating and Relaitonships can be fun. Parents who woory too much or not enough are the ones who's children will have hard times getting through bad break ups and first loves.  I was the "ugly duckling" in High school, and i had a steady boyfriend, he was my first love and even though it didn't work out didn't he long run we have been friend for years now.  My husband and i met when we were 20, and our friendship and relationship blossomed into so much more after being to gether a few months, we were both Active Duty and went to college part time. We have benn married for 2 years and are expecting a baby in the near future.   

  Datign isn't easy and will never be easy for any one. just make sure to instill good beliefs on your daughters and make sure they know the difference between Love and Lust.  

Our daughter is now 20 and we are still trying to figure out where we went wrong.

From the time she turned 17 is when the problems started.  We have tried everything and I mean everything tough love, restriction, rewards, trying to get her involved in different hobbies, counseling, doing things as a family and church. I truly believe most of the problem was peer pressure and wanting to be part of a group. So and so does it, so why can't I? Sound familiar?

 As a parent we have always been up front with Katie, telling her she can come to us about anything and if we cannot answer her question then we would find someone that could. It didn't matter if it was drugs, sex anything. Of course it is hard for young people to come to their parents with these questions so they turn to their peers. You have to become their friend as well as their parent. One thing these young people do not want to hear is "when I was your age" and I am sure we can all relate to that.

We have never given up even with the latest issue of the abuse. Now that she has been away from this guy form some time she is seeing more and more of his bad side. Counseling is starting to make her see things in a different light but it is still early days. Katie is now working towards getting her High School diploma, a job and make a better life for herself and her son. She like so many other young people has so much to be thankful for.

Although it has been a long hard road, there is some light at the end of the tunnel.

Thank you Dr. Phil and staff,

Jack

Hi Coryn...I hope you see your Mother really Loves you... She is trying to Help you!! Please Know as an adult...we have seen things and lived a life where we can Teach you...shes not trying to take away your fun....Its her Natural instincts to protect you...and one day when you have a child of your own you will understand that feeling....it feels like LIFE OR DEATH to her!!! She  is afraid he will hurt you!!! And if you don't stand up for yourself now you will have a problem later !!! Also KNOW this, you have one Mother....ONE........one day She will be very important to you....she will hold your  hand through every Pain sorrow child birth...You can only see the right now but please see her as she see you with eyes of Love & protection!!!....Remember she gave birth to you she has a connection with you that no other person can change She is the MaMa...Bear....and one day you will be glad she was.....Hugsss to you and your Mom......  

Annette....Mother of 3 Grandmother of 4