Message Boards

Topic : 08/02 "I Love Myself!"

Number of Replies: 1934
New Messages This Week: 0
Last Reply On:
Created on : Thursday, April 13, 2006, 01:18:17 pm
Author : DrPhilBoard1
(Original Air Date: 04/20/06) Do you know someone who craves attention so badly that he or she will do anything to get it? One family believes their loved one is a master manipulator and her ways are causing a major conflict in the household. Hilary claims she wouldn’t shed a tear if her stepdaughter, Shannon, died tomorrow. She calls Shannon a narcissist and says she will lie, fight and cuss just to be noticed. Shannon feels like a scapegoat, and thinks her stepmother is simply out to get her. When Shannon was younger, her biological mom died, and now she believes Hilary has turned her father and sister against her. Is Shannon’s behavior all an act, or do her father and stepmother need to change how they deal with her? Share your thoughts, join the discussion.

Find out what happened on the show.

More August 2006 Show Boards.

As of January, 2009, this message board will become "Read Only" and will be closed to further posting. Please join the NEW Dr. Phil Community to continue your discussions, personalize your message board experience, start a blog and meet new friends.

User Mood
Worried

Message Emote
blank
April 20, 2006, 4:30 pm PDT

This is what is wrong with society!

Parents not taking any accountablity or responsiblity or offering any sort of rational help for thier children.  I am sorry Shannon.  You are a strong soul and will make it!!    

Speaking from experience, the strongest is the excuse for others own lack of self worth.  Understand you need help to control your issues but you are not the reason that they say or do what they do.  THEY ARE THIER OWN WORST ENEMY.  

  

You do not need this.   

And stepmother - you know munipulation for one reason only, you have mastered in it!    

  

 
User Mood
Stressed

Message Emote
blank
April 20, 2006, 4:30 pm PDT

04/20 "I Love Myself!"

Quote From: shannonbug

This is Shannon from the show that you are talking about.  I just wanted you all to know that I am here and I am  trying to read all the responses and comments you have all left, BUT so many people are leaving comments that I am getting lost and not having a chance to.  I am overwhelmed by the amount of support and all the people that care.  I want you all to know that I am living with Jennifer, the lady on the show that defended me.  She is an awesome lady and reminds me a lot of my biological mom.  Jennifer and her husband have taken me into their home and treat me and love me like their own.  I have a TON of friends...who are now my only FAMILY!!!  I am truly touched and almost moved to tears by how many responses there are.  I appreciate all your care and concern.  I had no idea first of all of how many people have watched the show and then how many have left comments.  I am blown away by it all.  You have no idea how loved you have all made me feel.  The fact that you will take the time and watch the show and then take the time to leave a comment some very long and in depth is AMAZING.  I am slowly beginning to realize that I am a good person and I can do this and be OK.  I have a good job and I am working on getting my life together and being separate from those people.  I am 20 years old for any of you that were wondering.  I will eventually live on my own and be OK.  I know that.  I know in my heart that I am good and I will do everything to make my mom proud of me...as I know she all ready is.  Thanks for EVERYTHING!!!! 

Dear Shannon...I am glad that people are responding to you in a positive way...however I don't think you should count your family out so fast...I think that they are very irresponsible in responding to you the way they did and even quite a bit immature...but I believe with a little counseling that you could all be a family in the true sense of the word...I do agree that your stepmother should butt out and leave it between you and your father (a luxury that I never was given) but there's always room for healing...you're young and angry and I totally understand that, but just don't be too hasty in writing your family off...I do believe that they've wronged you terribly but if you forgive them, that gives you the freedom that you're looking for...stick with Dr. Phil and you won't go wrong!...Deb in Iowa
 
User Mood
Stressed

Message Emote
blank
April 20, 2006, 4:31 pm PDT

How can we help you?

Quote From: shannonbug

This is Shannon from the show that you are talking about.  I just wanted you all to know that I am here and I am  trying to read all the responses and comments you have all left, BUT so many people are leaving comments that I am getting lost and not having a chance to.  I am overwhelmed by the amount of support and all the people that care.  I want you all to know that I am living with Jennifer, the lady on the show that defended me.  She is an awesome lady and reminds me a lot of my biological mom.  Jennifer and her husband have taken me into their home and treat me and love me like their own.  I have a TON of friends...who are now my only FAMILY!!!  I am truly touched and almost moved to tears by how many responses there are.  I appreciate all your care and concern.  I had no idea first of all of how many people have watched the show and then how many have left comments.  I am blown away by it all.  You have no idea how loved you have all made me feel.  The fact that you will take the time and watch the show and then take the time to leave a comment some very long and in depth is AMAZING.  I am slowly beginning to realize that I am a good person and I can do this and be OK.  I have a good job and I am working on getting my life together and being separate from those people.  I am 20 years old for any of you that were wondering.  I will eventually live on my own and be OK.  I know that.  I know in my heart that I am good and I will do everything to make my mom proud of me...as I know she all ready is.  Thanks for EVERYTHING!!!! 

Do you have a post office box?  I'm sure there are a lot of people that would love to help you get your life together... Are you thinking of going to school?  Can we help  you get into to  or continue college?   Please let us know if there is anything else that we can do...
 
User Mood
Mellow

Message Emote
blank
April 20, 2006, 4:31 pm PDT

04/20 "I Love Myself!"

Quote From: shannonbug

This is Shannon from the show that you are talking about.  I just wanted you all to know that I am here and I am  trying to read all the responses and comments you have all left, BUT so many people are leaving comments that I am getting lost and not having a chance to.  I am overwhelmed by the amount of support and all the people that care.  I want you all to know that I am living with Jennifer, the lady on the show that defended me.  She is an awesome lady and reminds me a lot of my biological mom.  Jennifer and her husband have taken me into their home and treat me and love me like their own.  I have a TON of friends...who are now my only FAMILY!!!  I am truly touched and almost moved to tears by how many responses there are.  I appreciate all your care and concern.  I had no idea first of all of how many people have watched the show and then how many have left comments.  I am blown away by it all.  You have no idea how loved you have all made me feel.  The fact that you will take the time and watch the show and then take the time to leave a comment some very long and in depth is AMAZING.  I am slowly beginning to realize that I am a good person and I can do this and be OK.  I have a good job and I am working on getting my life together and being separate from those people.  I am 20 years old for any of you that were wondering.  I will eventually live on my own and be OK.  I know that.  I know in my heart that I am good and I will do everything to make my mom proud of me...as I know she all ready is.  Thanks for EVERYTHING!!!! 

Shannon- I am 23 years old and you remind me a lot of myself. I have to say that your dad and evil step wench should be happy that they have you instead of me, bc if I was in your position, I would have done a lot more. I know thats wrong to say, but I was so heated watching the show at the ignorance and lack of compassion that I just wanted to jump through the screen. I want you to know that there are people out there that know what you are and were going through and we love you.. unconditionally.. as your father cant seem to do. My dad is the same way. And believe me, I was so resentful after a while at him and my mom for not protecting me, that I acted out in ways that would make what you did seem soft. At one point, to get me out if the house, my dad lied and told police that I had hit my mom so that they would take me to a psych ward.  I still struggle. But you will be ok. Just believe in yourself. We all love you. and as far as your father and that c*nt that he married, they can just go to hell. I hope they read this. If they are, i want your dad to know that he failed as a parent. And i want your step mom to know that she is a piece of garbage. BE GLAD IM NOT YOUR DAUGHTER!! 

  

anyways, love to you, shannon. my email is in my profile. write if you wish. id love to know how you are. 

  

Amy 

 
User Mood
Happy

Message Emote
blank
April 20, 2006, 4:32 pm PDT

keepupgirl

Quote From: shannonbug

This is Shannon from the show that you are talking about.  I just wanted you all to know that I am here and I am  trying to read all the responses and comments you have all left, BUT so many people are leaving comments that I am getting lost and not having a chance to.  I am overwhelmed by the amount of support and all the people that care.  I want you all to know that I am living with Jennifer, the lady on the show that defended me.  She is an awesome lady and reminds me a lot of my biological mom.  Jennifer and her husband have taken me into their home and treat me and love me like their own.  I have a TON of friends...who are now my only FAMILY!!!  I am truly touched and almost moved to tears by how many responses there are.  I appreciate all your care and concern.  I had no idea first of all of how many people have watched the show and then how many have left comments.  I am blown away by it all.  You have no idea how loved you have all made me feel.  The fact that you will take the time and watch the show and then take the time to leave a comment some very long and in depth is AMAZING.  I am slowly beginning to realize that I am a good person and I can do this and be OK.  I have a good job and I am working on getting my life together and being separate from those people.  I am 20 years old for any of you that were wondering.  I will eventually live on my own and be OK.  I know that.  I know in my heart that I am good and I will do everything to make my mom proud of me...as I know she all ready is.  Thanks for EVERYTHING!!!! 

Keep on keeping on girlfriend. I glad Dr. Phil defended you. I hope the counseling will help.  Everybody  is not perfect.  I didnt see the whole show but honey God loves you.  Be nice to your father and stepmother and tell them that you love them and they will get it in the end.  Your stepmother has no guilt.  My mother always prefer to my sister  and I give me love and kindness to the ones that give it to me.  by the way you are very pretty girl. 
 
User Mood
Happy

Message Emote
blank
April 20, 2006, 4:32 pm PDT

Super wonderful

I just read Shannon's post about how she is living with Jennifer and her husband and is not at the other place. So glad to hear that. And has a job and doing well. Whew, makes you feel so much better. They must be special people to do that!!!! 
 
User Mood
Good

Message Emote
blank
April 20, 2006, 4:33 pm PDT

TOXIC PARENTS

The step mother proved who she was by putting down the daughter when Dr Phil was praising her.  That was a nasty, hateful comment and I am glad Dr. Phil called her on it.  I'll even go one step further and call it emotional abuse! It seems to me that the ONLY reason why this nasty comment was made was to make the daughter feel bad about herself!! That, by definition, MAKES IT  ABUSE!!!  Did you see the look on the daughters face after that comment? It broke my heart!   

Shannon needs  to read the book Toxic Parents....Everything her parents said about her can be found in the chapeter titled Emotional Abuse. NORMAL parents don't say "if she died tomorrow...." Toxic parents do!!!! Toxic people blame others for their own failings......and they, as parents,  have failed miserably...   

 
User Mood
Angry

Message Emote
hopeful
April 20, 2006, 4:34 pm PDT

04/20 "I Love Myself!"

Quote From: shannonbug

This is Shannon from the show that you are talking about.  I just wanted you all to know that I am here and I am  trying to read all the responses and comments you have all left, BUT so many people are leaving comments that I am getting lost and not having a chance to.  I am overwhelmed by the amount of support and all the people that care.  I want you all to know that I am living with Jennifer, the lady on the show that defended me.  She is an awesome lady and reminds me a lot of my biological mom.  Jennifer and her husband have taken me into their home and treat me and love me like their own.  I have a TON of friends...who are now my only FAMILY!!!  I am truly touched and almost moved to tears by how many responses there are.  I appreciate all your care and concern.  I had no idea first of all of how many people have watched the show and then how many have left comments.  I am blown away by it all.  You have no idea how loved you have all made me feel.  The fact that you will take the time and watch the show and then take the time to leave a comment some very long and in depth is AMAZING.  I am slowly beginning to realize that I am a good person and I can do this and be OK.  I have a good job and I am working on getting my life together and being separate from those people.  I am 20 years old for any of you that were wondering.  I will eventually live on my own and be OK.  I know that.  I know in my heart that I am good and I will do everything to make my mom proud of me...as I know she all ready is.  Thanks for EVERYTHING!!!! 

I've been in your place, I really have. Stepmom from hell type deal. You'll be fine, just keep working through it. Honestly, it just takes time to heal. Also, a friendly piece of advice, the sooner you can let go of the hurt, the easier it is to move on. Just something from someone four years older that's having to heal too. You don't have to forgive or forget, just sort of...ignore their words, and they'll lose power of you entirely.  And if you can't have a relationship with your dad (my dad only came back to me after me landing in the hospital), then you're better off. It royally sucks that it happened to you. Truly does. No one should be made to feel like you were. No one's perfect, but it's the parent's responsibility to protect and provide, which includes emotional stability as well. Your daddy fell flat on his face for that job. *hugs* It does get better, the ache does start to dull, and you do start to realize just how valuable you are (and you seem to be on your way, and that's a blessed thing, believe me). And I would keep those close friends as family, you're better off, sweets. Friends are just family you get to chose, being biologically related doesn't amount to much in some cases. You have my support, for whatever it's worth.
 
User Mood
Happy

Message Emote
blank
April 20, 2006, 4:34 pm PDT

04/20 "I Love Myself!"

I am totally outraged about this family. Shannon is wrong in being disrespectful and acting out. Dont satisfy her hunger for negative attention, but don't make her an outcast in the family.. thats asure way to really mess a person up.This girl needs love and she needs help. I have seen this very same scenario fist hand. When theses things things what a person does not need to hear is i wouldnt cry if u died it doesnt matter how it was said. Dr. Phil is asking the question that needs to be answered "Why?" Something is happening. To the Dad.......... get it together.  Don't help to gang up on your daughter be on her side. Even when she's wrong. Tell her, but the whole house does not . You dont.need to be on her case  all at once. No one wants to hear that u've given up on them either. It would also behoove this family to actually validate her feelings and not just send her to the furnace after evey thing she says. This would give you or anyone else a feeling of not being  loved.  Next, the pictures of her mother. They didnt need to be to be taken down. Not all of them. Her mom did not cheat and her mom did not walk out.... she died...so she will forever be a part of all of their lives and she's not  a threat to the step mom so let the girl grieve. Aggitating eachother wont get them anywhere and I"m positive it's not all Shannon.The whole school thing was horrible!!!  This whole Family needs help, not just Shannon. They will be fine soon as that is realized. I will be praying for this family.
 
User Mood
Hyper

Message Emote
blank
April 20, 2006, 4:34 pm PDT

You've got to be kidding!

Let's put some of the blame where some it belongs.So it's in your daugters best interest that you removed her from her home by shipping her out. By having someone take her room,and violate her life by handling and removing her things.By cutting her off from the only form of life she has ever known.Let's put a bear cub instead of a child,how would they react?But I think that I would prefer the bear parents for Shannon instead.I'm sure it would a much more loving family.Why it's a shame that you and Robin couldn't take her to your HOME for a little while.I'm am sure that she would then become the beautiful person she is inside.The old saying, you get more with sugar.What I see in you and Robin,In your loving family,things this girl has never seen or touched,someone to believe in her.I'm sitting here at 56 with tears rolling down my face,for I have no way to help her.It's up to you,please make this a pet project,Robin please,pay special attention to this one,I know you see what I see.If you think of anything I can do to help,please,please,contact me.                                  
 
First | Prev | 44 | 45 | 46 | 47 | 48 | 49 | 50 | 51 | 52 | 53 | Next | Last