Topic : 07/06 Baby Wars

I have to say, I agree with you here.    

I'm a pro-choice woman who is unable to carry a child to term.  I'm 29 years old and I have degenerative arthritis in my spine between lumbar 5 and my pelvis.  I understand and appreciate where this man is coming from.  This woman told him that she could not have children.  Well, it's obvious that she can.  What this guy did was he made a mistake.  He decided not to use a condom and it was the wrong decision.  I'm sure none of the people who are screaming that he should have kept his pants on have ever made a mistake before but let's pretend for two seconds that you're human and you have.  If you're with someone in a relationship and that person says they can't have children for whatever reason, if they have never given you a reason to doubt their word, why should you assume they are lying?  If the answer is yes, then technically shouldn't you assume they're lying about other things in the relationship?  If you can't truly take their word for one thing, or anything, how can you believe anything anyone ever tells you?  My fiance was told by a doctor after several tests that he can't have children.  But guess what?  We ended up pregnant!  This is after a doctor saying he can't have kids and two forms of birth control.  (Your favorite argument, condoms and the pill!!!)  So guess what?  Birth control helps but it isn't the cure-all.  I had to have an abortion because carrying the child to term would have been a terrible burden on my already ailing back.  Anyway, the reality is now there is a child involved.  I think if he can prove she lied about it, he should be able to get out of paying child support.  Women have lots of choices available to them.  Do men deserve less?    

Until men can learn to keep it in their pants, they need to reap what they sow.  If paying for an unwanted kid is the case, well it's an expensive lesson to learn but it's still a valuable one.  

I can't tell you how many times I've heard the b.s. "she was on the pill" or "she said she can't get pregnant" in response to some male acting a fool when it comes to birth control.  Men will lie to get out of any sort of parental responsibility.  My ex actually said his ex-wife lied to him to "trap him in the marriage" by having a kid.  Then he went on to insist that he not wear a condom or anything FULL WELL KNOWING that I wasn't on birth control of any sort.  And he not only impregnated me, but put the pressure on to get an abortion, threatening everything but my life.  I ditched him, and he went on to impregnate another lady.  

Yet he said she wasn't even his girlfriend and didn't know who she was (as she was carrying his kid) and was still sleeping with other women...without protection.  And I can tell you that he'd be the first in line for some sort of relinquishment of responsibility.  He's been trying for years...13 to be exact.  And the only person he hurts is his child.  It's the saddest thing I've ever seen.  

That Matt kid on the show just reminded me of my ex.  He needs to stop acting like a little brat and be a man and own up to his "mistake."  No one said he had to be a FATHER...he just has to fund the child he made.  It's kind of like creaing a ton of credit card debt: you may think that you're all good and under the radar but you still have to pay off the balance, whether you want to or not.  Even in ID theft, people still have to pay the balances on the cards that other people made in their names (my family member is going through this right now).  Like Dr. Phil said, if he really wanted control, he'd have insisted on a condom (b/c birth control pills are more fallible than condoms).    

And like Gessart said, when a guy starts going through the risks of pregnancy, he can whine about choices.  Until then, his only choice is to keep it in his pants if he doesn't want to deal w/responsibility.  

And these same males can also get out of it with evidence in his favor.  Not a bunch of "well when i brought her home drunk at 3 am from the bar she said she was on bc" claims...proper, actual evidence. 

Most women, when seeking child support, have to PROVE that the child is that of the man they're seeking support from.  And the man can insist the tests be done.   

I agree that people need to be protected from the types of vipers out there who will lie to snag a guy or his money.  Those females do exist.  But a man can always protect himself and exercise his ultimate reproductive right: USE A CONDOM.  Then he only has a 1% or less risk of becoming a father. 

There ya go.   

That people shouldn't rely so steadfastly on birth control chemicals.  Chemicals fail, b/c our body builds up a resistance.  Or they fail b/c we utilize another chemical that cancels it out. 

For instance, in the case of Matt and Lauren, she very well may have been on the pill.  But with some brands, if you take an antibiotic or even a Motrin, their potency becomes weaker and one has a higher chance of conception.  Maybe she was on the pill, but was taking something that counteracted her pill, and they conceived.  It happens ALL THE TIME.  Even Planned Parenthood says that the pill aren't as "safe" as wearing a condom.  At least, the one where I lived said that.  

I was on Depo, and it worked for me b/c I was so messed up by the fake hormone that I would've stabbed any penis that came near me.  But I know others who got pregnant on Depo, supposedly the most potent chemical birth control method out there.  It depends on the individual. 

That lady could've been on the pill and the dosage wasn't right for her.  Or something.  The body changes so much b/c of these chemicals that they're not functional at times.   

Men and women alike need to know their options and what they entail.  A lot of women are on the pill but don't know that other OTC meds can diminish the capacity of the pill.  Even less men know this.   

It's always best to arm oneself with education as a preventative measure rather than have a knee-jerk reaction (such as this frivolous lawsuit) after the fact.  And the men on this show just showed their ignorance.  They're not victims, they just failed to research.   

And that guy who runs the men's center who's helping that kid...lmfao!  Not shocking he's not a father, and I'd be surprised if he's had a date since 1974.  He's ooky!