Topic : 07/06 Baby Wars

As long as Roe V Wade gives women a choice as to whether or not they are ready to parent a child, then men should also have a legal choice.    

In case you are wondering, I think that Matt Dubay is acting like a snake. I also think that he is being used by the National Center for Men and his lawyer to push a cause forward, just as Norma McCorvey was just a pawn in the Roe V Wade case.    

I am pro-life, and wish that abortion was not a legal choice, but as long as it is, men deserve the same rights.

I believe that if you are not ready to be a mother or a father, you should not have sex at all.  Everybody knows that there is at least a 1% chance that you could get pregnant even if you are on birth control or use a condom unless you have had your uterus or testicles removed.  There have even been cases of women getting pregnant after having their tubes tied.  I was not ready to be a mother when I got pregnant, but I also believe that it is morally wrong to have an abortion, and I could not imagine giving up something that was a part of me and grew inside of my body.  I kept my child and am still happily with his father and still not married after 4 1/2 years.  I believe that it is the woman's choice to keep her child or abort it, and it is the also the father's responsibility to take care of that child.  If a man does not want to end up being a father, he should really consider abstinence.  It is the irresponsibility of both parties who decided to take the chance of getting pregnant, but it is the woman's choice whether or not to keep the child.  If the mother decides to keep the child and the father does not want to, he should take responibility and be a big enough man to take care of the child that was ACCIDENTALLY conceived.    

Absolutely!! Men’s rights are frequently violated. I am a female and I say this!!! 

I have 4 step-children. As good as my husband does trying to take care of them, he’s gone through a LOT to do so. He got his first wife pregnant as a teenager. He told her no more children. But, another one came along 2 years later, then twins in another 2 years. Then his wife had an affair and left him. 

At one point, the court system (that fails men AS WELL AS THE CHILDREN), garnished him his entire paycheck except for $250/mo. He ended up homeless, unable to pay for gas across town to pick the kids up. He was also getting credit collectors coming after him for his ex-wife’s debt.  

Five years later, we are just becoming **somewhat** stable financially to start paying off this debt, plus child support, plus paying for gas to go get the kids, groceries from when they come over. 

My issue is that the women become soooooooo protected that the men BECOME deadbeats. I’ve seen statistics that indicate very few men want to be deadbeats. Some become deadbeats because there is no way out of the sinking sand they are swimming in.  

Who suffered from all this??? THE KIDS!!!!!!!!! They are good kids, but they believe awful things about my husband because of what his ex-wife says. He just says, “Hmmm,” when he hears things because he doesn’t want to trash the ex-wife to them. 

To this day, we are still paying on the ex-wife’s debt because she has made it absolutely clear what kind of allegations she will make against my husband if we don’t follow her demands. If that’s the case, we will no longer see the kids. 

Who got the raw end of the deal???? 

If the court had more of a balance, the kids would have had a more balanced father who could have provided a safe home for them on weekends. It's taken 5 years for him to recover from the divorce!!!!!! Now we are just rebuilding relationships with the kids. 

Dr. Phil,   

Depending on which state a man lives in he does have parental rights just like a woman does. . . in certain states a man may choose to voluntarily terminate all parental rights he has to a child, and in exchange cannot be held responsible for financial commitments such as child support.  I am sure that that is not the case for Matt, but it is an option in many states.    

Additionally, one difference legally, between a man and a woman in this context is that Roe v. Wade and Planned Parenthood v. Casey (the landmark abortion cases), involve competeing constitutional fundamental rights -- a woman's fundamental liberty interest balanced against that of a baby's fundamental life interest.  Thus, while I can appriciate their argument, legally a man has no physical liberty interest that would be violated by carrying a child to term.  Therefore analogizing his "right" to that of a woman is like comparing apples to oranges legally.    

Finally, I wholeheartedly agree that should Matt's action prevail it will have detrimental consequences for dead-beat dad's skirting their responsibilties.  In the end it is the children that suffer.    

blah blah blah.....  if  if and buts were beer & nuts.... 

He agreed to have sex without a condom   not to take care of anything as a result 

     First of all they are not marriied and the bottom line they are sining again GOD. reguardless of what she says, were is his mind in proctecting hisself.  This world is getting sick by the minute.  

I'm sorry but I can't believe the nerve of the girl. If you sit there and tell a guy that there is no way you can get pregnant and convince him not to use protection, and he flat out told you he was not ready to have a child, if you get pregnant it is your problem. Yes in an ideal world it would be nice for the guy to be in his kids life, but no one has the right to force him into it. The girl took it upon herself to have the kid, she should grow up and take responsibility for the kid by herself, if she can't do that then she should of terminated the pregnancy or put the kid up for adoption.  The thing that irritates me is that the girl sued him for child support.  

If you take the responsibility of brining a child into this world, you yourself need to be able to take care of the child, and not rely on someone you cannot depend on or ask for handouts.   

If you bring a child into this world you need to have a secure and stable household, so the child can have a safe and happy home.  

This guy should definitely not have to pay child support! he said he could no take care of the baby, he has no legal bind to the woman, so she needs to step up and take care of her child by herself, she is the one who decided to keep the baby even though the boy and her were not together and stop relying on a man for financial support.  

Honestly I believe that she somehow believes that by making him pay child support will somehow get this guy back in her life. It really irritates me how some women act so helpless and pathetic.