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Topic : 07/06 Baby Wars

Number of Replies: 7225

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Created on : Thursday, April 13, 2006, 01:22:17 pm

Author : DrPhilBoard1

(Original Air Date: 04/21/06) Being a parent is hard enough, but what happens when Mom and Dad can't agree on how many kids to have, how to raise 'em and how to get ‘em to sleep? Sometimes, it can lead to an all-out baby war! Matt's baby battle ended up in front of a judge and made headlines. He was ordered to pay child support for the baby he had with his ex-girlfriend, but he says he shouldn't have to cough up the money because she told him she wasn't able to get pregnant, and he told her he didn't want to be a father. He, his attorney, and the director of the National Center for Men discuss the lawsuit they filed, known as “Roe v. Wade for Men,” arguing that men should have a constitutional right to avoid fatherhood. Next, Dan says even though he and his wife, Lisa, already have four children, he wants just one more. Lisa has been pregnant on and off for 11 years and says she's closed for baby business. Will Dr. Phil help Dan see Lisa's point that four is enough? Then, a frustrated husband is camping out on the roof of his house and living in a tent. He refuses to go back to his bedroom until his wife moves their kids out of their bed and starts paying more attention to him. Can Dr. Phil get him to come down the ladder? Plus, a sleep expert has a simple method for getting your child to sleep through the night. See the plan in action! Share advice and talk about the show here.

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sunrize604

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April 21, 2006, 1:49 pm PDT

Hello!

Any mature adult that is engaging in sexual activity, is obviously taking the chance of becoming a parent. How hard is that to figure out? If you don't want to be a parent, it is up to you to take the precautions necessary. Relying on anyone else to make sure that you aren't burdened with a child shows immaturity. Denying a child because you are irresponsible is emotionally damaging to that child and wrong. That child did not ask you to have sex. Knowing that any form of birth control is not 100% effective brings me back to the obvious...Sexual activity can equal the responsibility of parenthood. Grow up!

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lucyinlove

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frustrated

April 21, 2006, 1:50 pm PDT

Say that again?

Quote From: threebears

If a man doesn't want to be a father then he shouldn't have sex! Simple as that. Some men out there have got to learn that if you can't keep it in your pants then you have to suffer the aftermath. I think Matt is just trying to find a way to keep from having to take responsibilities for his actions and doesn't want to fork out HIS money to take care of HIS baby. If he wins this lawsuit then it will just be another excuse for all the dads out there who are not taking care of their kids.

MATT: YOU DID CHOOSE TO BE A FATHER WHEN YOU HAD SEX, AND EVERY TIME YOU HAVE SEX YOU RUN THAT RISK. ALL WOMEN KNOW THAT, SO WHY CAN'T MEN LIKE YOU GET THAT THROUGH YOU THICKS SKULLS????????????????????????

Can you repeat that but take out the names so that it reads something like this

"Pro-choicers: YOU DID CHOOSE TO BE A MOTHER WHEN YOU HAD SEX, AND EVERY TIME YOU HAVE SEX YOU RUN THAT RISK. EVERYONE KNOWS THAT SO WHY CAN'T WOMAN LIKE YOU GET THAT THROUGH YOUR THINK SKULLS????????????"

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doosie

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April 21, 2006, 1:50 pm PDT

Matts decision

Matt made a decision when he dropped his pants. If he wasn't ready to be a father, he shouldn't have taken the risk. He made the decision to take that risk I believe he should now step up and take care of his responsibility. The only sure way to avoid parenthood is to keep your pants up.

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westerlund

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April 21, 2006, 1:50 pm PDT

04/21 Baby Wars

If this guy didn't want to be a father yet then he should of kept his pants zipped and gone back home to mommy. Now that he had made the choice to have sex then he needs to be a man and step up to the plate and be a father.

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vfleming1

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April 21, 2006, 1:50 pm PDT

Choices?

I am currently pregnant and due on May 2nd. I was surprised by today's episode where the father was denying his child because he was not given a choice. My husband and I decided after my daughter, we wouldn't have anymore kids. We then chose to try again because we wanted her to have a sibling. After 5 years of frustration and not getting pregnant, we chose to stop. We then faced new challenges in our life with our careers and felt that the choice to stop was appropriate. When I recieved my store for management and promotion, we were surprised to learn I was pregnant. We were happy but at the same time upset and concerned. We both ended up in denial, but knew we needed to come to terms accepting that there was a child on the way and it may be the lord's way of telling us it was his plan for us. As the time grew the happier we became. This father needs to understand that things happen for a reason. Everything in this world has a purpose. It is very possible that she was told she could not get pregnant and the doctors were wrong. He had unprotected sex and needs to take responsibility for his actions. The lawsuit is not right and I do believe this could open a door for deadbeat fathers. When he comes out of denial he will realize that the thing he missed out on was that baby's early years and could come to regret it.

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lady4ross

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April 21, 2006, 1:50 pm PDT

It's all about accountability

Let's not forget tht the mother did not think she COULD get pregnant due to medical issues and the fact that she was also on birth control due to other medical issues. There is NO ONE toblame here. This is just one of those things that happens That being said......If he truly didn't want to be a father than there were two options to him, only one of which is 100% fool proof. He could have used a condom or he could have remained abstinent..

I believe that men shoudl have a voice in these matters but this isn'tone of them. He made the choice to have unprotected sex and he needs to be accountable for his actions and the results thereof. His partner is doing her part and I am sure she was quite suprised (among other things) heself when she found out she was pregnant.

There is only one way not to have a baby.. Don't have sex.

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suearnett

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April 21, 2006, 1:50 pm PDT

Keep the condoms?

Quote From: sunkistldy

This man doesn't want to be a father? Fine, but once he stopped taking responsability for his actions the point is moot. He had a choice whether or not to wear a condom, he said he did at first....why did he stop? I think that once the condom came off, he became responsible . It would surprise me if the court find him not responsible for this child. Had he worn a condom everytime and had it failed while in use, then, and only then,he should be found not responsible, at least it would show that he tried to make an effort to avoid a pregnancy.

He made that choice regardless of what he was told by the childs mother, He is responsible for his own destiny. Time to grow up!

So what is he supposed to do? Keep all the condoms for proof? Anybody can say they wore protection but it's his word against hers, don't you think?

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tlrueb

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April 21, 2006, 1:50 pm PDT

Father's rights

I agree with the fathet. If he is choosing to not have anything to do with the baby then he should have the right to sign his rights over fully to the mother. I believe the father should have a choice or say in the matter.

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tnshopgirl

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April 21, 2006, 1:50 pm PDT

He did make his choice

I am not sure where to begin.... I am totally astounded that a man could be this uneducated about a subject which began thousands of years ago? Yes, the woman makes alot of choices but afterall it is her body which will serve as a haven for 9 months... She made the same choices he did in consenting to sex... She is standing up for her part of the bargain... She is being a mother... This guy doesn't have a clue how hard it is and obviously some of his entourage doesn't either because one of the gentlemen didn't even have a child of his own..??? How could he understand.. Truly I pitty this guy.. The most beautiful part of his life he is throwing away... Those of us who are Christians understand that it was God's decision for this child to be born. It was His blessing on these two and if this guy wants to walk away then he shall be the one to account for it later. This young woman has been blessed and she is taking responsibility for the beautiful little girl.

If this guy wants to make choices on whether or not he serves as the father or if the baby is aborted etc.. then can we make the decision whether the guy gets a vasectomy?? I wonder how open he would be to going under the knife? That way he could think with both and still not have to worry... No one would make a decision to keep or not keep one of God's blessings..

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nolanmama

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April 21, 2006, 1:50 pm PDT

Men have lots of choices.

A lot of men fell the say as he did, but they still take care of there responsibilities. If he refuses to be a parent to that child he should sign away his rights to her. That way the mother will have sole custody of her. Right now he can say at any time he is ready to be the dad. People don't think anymore when they jump into bed. Men think that Women have all the control. Men have the right to say no or use protection. There is always a chance that a person can conceive or produce enough sperm. People just need to be more responsible... Keep there parts in there pants and keep there legs closed and then this problem would not exist.

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