Topic : 07/06 Baby Wars

Ok there is no way to get yourself pregnant!!!

To be sexual permiscuity in our society is to be popular it has seemed.  At one of my last jobs I was known as a prude because I did not show my boobies or flaunt myself.  On the television the people that young people look up to are basically "stripper dancing" in string bakinis and that is cool to our children. If he thinks it is ok to go sleep with his girlfriend and act all ethical and "I said this and I said that" than he needs some therapy.   

Matt needs to understand that if he had sex before he is married than he made that choice no matter what he thought the outcome was going to be.  I feel bad for the girl and the child.  What a fool that Matt is.     

 I am all about  equal rights for men and W6men, at work  and in public, but the truth is in relationships  we are different. in this particular situation it does appear that both people thought that pregnancy was out of the picture, however, she took the pills, and he got rid of the condom for his personal need for a more sensual experience.  In my opinion, he failed his part, thus he is just as responsible if not more.
So why does he not have equal part in the decision about what happens to the baby?
the answer is easy.  I think as soon as he starts getting pregnant, walking around with stretched out belly, swollen ankles, throwing up, trying to sit or lay with no comfortable position, go through the pains of labor, as well as anticipation of birth and feeling the baby kick., then he should have all the rights  in deciding about what happens to the baby, not her.  It is easy to say she could have an abortion, but does this young man know that the procedure is painful, uncomfortable, runs the risk of damage to reproductive organs and risk of having difficulty getting pregnant in the future? Would he want a part of his body ripped out? Some women go through abortion, and that is their right- it is their body and they suffer the consequences, thus even this route is not easy. And this man  thinks that  he had the bad end of this deal? 500 dollars will never cover the expenses of a child. Children cost a lot more than 6000 a year. When you add the time and effort to take care of this baby, he is getting away easy. And why does it seem OK that someone else should be adopting and raising his child. if the baby is adopted it should not relieve father or mother  from financial consequences, . Giving up for adoption is not a solution, you still have all the pregnancy "joys" that are not so joyful. If he does not want to pay monthly support, may he would like to pay a lump sum for all the troubles that his sexual partner had to go through and if she has abortion or give a child for adoption she will need the money for  all the therapy that she will need.(he obviously won't need therapy). 120K should be about enough and about the same as his monthly payments will cost him in 20 years. The way I see it, it was an expensive mistake, and it should teach him a lesson, as the young mother will be reminded of her lesson every day. If no financial consequence exists, what will teach him a lesson?Current law is very needed, as it is keeping this world in some type of boundaries and teaches people responsibilities. For women those responsibilities imposed on by her nature, If man's responsibility is taken away, then it becomes unfair, and I would call that unequal rights.
    
A little note to the Lawyer, if this case would win, it  WOULD open up a new way for irresponsible men to get away from responsibility. As long as there are lawyers, they will be pointing at this trial in every Court.  It would be nice to be famous and quoted all over the country, wouldn't it?

 I have two children and i know how hard it is to raise them  i dont know how woman do it by themselves let alone in your situation you have your daughter and her child to take care of .  You are a great person and a gift to them both im very proud of you and im sure somehow you will get help with the expences remember that if god brings you to it he will bring you through it. Im sure its really hard taking care of a handicaped child  i worked at a school and did that i loved it every child is a gift from god well hope this helps a little good luck and hope you have a great day

i cannot  believe you wrote that let alone thought it. this whole subject just turns my stomach. how many women have given birth and raised children they werent ready for because a "MAN" said THEY WERE STERILE?  How many men are TRYING TO GET OUT OF PAYING CHILD SUPPORT? its so very fun to make them but none to care for them. And as for rights he has them its called signing a paper stateing he waves ALL PARENTAL RIGHTS. and viola all gone and he can go to his sick selfish ways again.  

  

If a man seriously does not want children, get fixed, use a condom. why is so much of it placed on us women, it is so much more invasive for women to take care of birth control. whats wrong with him that he cant wrap it up. women can suffer CANCER and STERALITY from birth controls. what does a man suffer? less feeling during sex. oh the poor man. GIVE ME A BREAK! 

  

alot of women cant get pregnant, or have a tough time getting pregnant, or are unsure if they can. if he doent want children then he MUST CONTROL HIS OWN REPRODUCTIVE RIGHTS. IE.. condom. you hear all the time a woman has to have the control over her own body. time for men to have control over theirs. dont complain after that "oh poor me i have to pay child support over a child i dont want" get over it already and take care of your responsiabilities 

Not much to say here.im female and agree totally with You...........enough of men taking all the BLAME

I guess it is my up brining and how my parents raised me. I was always told the if i felt that i was old enough to engage in sex then i was old enough to have children.  That i had to decide for myself that i was old enough to have children before i had sex.  I belive that if more parents would explain that no birth control is 100%.  and that if you have sex whether your partner is sterile or not then that it is always a possibility.  I know a lady who the doctor told her she was going through menopase and children were out of the picture. Guess what shes pregnant.    

I believe that Matt should grow up. He had two choices to not have sex or to wear a condom. I think that he should buck up and take responisblity for his child. What kind of message is he sending his daughter with his actions. If he doesnt want anything to do with his child he should terminate his rights and let the mother and child be.  And maby think about either not having sex or getting a better sex education so the next time he will be more apt to use a condom cause then he would have a little bit of control.   

 The agree, but the decision should to have a child should be made prior to conception.  This would require long conservations before SEX!  Young people are all about hormones and not logic. Great comment though! MARY

when i was 25 my then boyfriend knew that i didn't want to have kids until i was thirty.  i was on the pill and he was using a condom, but he had put a whole in it.  i had been given antibiotics for strep throat , so i got pregnant, and he know i felt about it.  later after i gave birth to our daughter, he told me he got me pregnant on purpose.  i was 25 and he was 42.  

   

we got married and divorced a year later. and i still feel like i was betrayed and used.