Topic : 07/06 Baby Wars

Who said she lied? My take on it was that she thought she couldn't conceive. She was wrong, obviously. I don't care who's right or wrong. This child is the victim here. The child is the only one who is 100% innocent. What's done is done. The child is still here. There's no going back now. If he definitely did not want children, then he shouldn't have been having sex. That's the ONLY guarantee in this life. Now it's time to step up to the plate for that child.  

I'm tired of seeing people not wanting to take responsibility for their actions, whether they be male or female. If he doesn't step up to the plate and be a father, it will come back to bite him later. When he dies, is he going to say, "Boy, I'm sure glad I wasn't supportive to that child..."? I think not.  

Whatever decision he makes, it will have an impact on that child. One could only hope it will be a positive impact.  

FACT: He still had sex  

FACT: He still had unprotected sex.   

FACT: Some hot shot lawyer has talked him into filing a law suit that makes him look like a  cold hearted, self centered jerk. Get a grip- if you play, you pay.   

Grow Up Matt!!!!  

I would love to know what his parents have to say about this. Do they agree, not, do they have anything to do with their grandchild ? Just a thought........... 

To the father who feels he needs not to pay child support, 

I am a child support caseworker.  As part of my job, I go into health classes in high schools and explain how and why child support is important.    One of our biggest discussions is regarding why do I have to pay?  

If you choose to have sexual relations with another person,  there is ALWAYS a chance the girl/woman could get pregnant.  Even if a condom, birth control pill, etc is used there is a chance of pregnancy.  I'm unclear as to why this is such a difficult concept for a person to understand.  I also do not understand why a young man like Matt is having sex if he doesn't want to be a Dad.  The only sure fire way not to become a dad is to abstain from sex. 

If you are determined to be the father, you pay support - it's your obligation (financially).  That child deserves and should have your support both financially and hopefully emotionally.  This is the way courts look at this situation.  We have a situation we discuss in classes - 2 couples on a double date - one uses a condom and the other doesn't have one.  They borrow the first couple's condom and turn it inside out.  The second couple gets pregnant.  But it's not her boyfriend/date that is responsible - it's the DNA from the first male that got her pregnant.   It's about DNA and about the woman carrying the child for the 9 months.  A man just lays the seed and then can run away.   Here's the bottom line - don't want a kid - don't have sex! 

Shelley 

Wyoming 

How could he expect her to bear the whole of the responsibility to raise that child?  She told him that she had a medical condition that did not allow her to have children, so, things happen! He still had the right & responsibility to wear a condom, after all she was on birth control.  This is just a stunt to get out of paying child support! It takes two to tango buddy, its not like she did it on her own. Step up and be a man, take responsibility, or keep your pants zipped!! If you don't want to be a father don't have sex without a condom!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Is it just me or is this lawsuit a waste of time and tax payers money.   

To the man who is going to court to avoid paying child support because he did not want a child.  Even if she said she could not get pregnant, you would think you would still want to protect yourself not only against an unwanted pregnancy, but also STD's.  You are taking your life in your hands these days. 

But now that the child is here, be a man stand up and take care of your child.  Whether you wanted the child or not is no longer the issue, the child is here and why should that child suffer because you are selfish? 

I raised my children alone because their father whom I was married to, decided not to participate in their lives, we divorced due to his abuse of me.  But even though I did all I could, every child needs a father and not having one has huge impacts on children.  I know, I did not have a father and my children did not have a father, that was his choice not mine.  The choice you are making is going to hurt your child, and rather than thinking about what you did or did not want, that child deserves to be loved and deserves a father.