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Topic : 07/06 Baby Wars

Number of Replies: 7225

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Created on : Thursday, April 13, 2006, 01:22:17 pm

Author : DrPhilBoard1

(Original Air Date: 04/21/06) Being a parent is hard enough, but what happens when Mom and Dad can't agree on how many kids to have, how to raise 'em and how to get ‘em to sleep? Sometimes, it can lead to an all-out baby war! Matt's baby battle ended up in front of a judge and made headlines. He was ordered to pay child support for the baby he had with his ex-girlfriend, but he says he shouldn't have to cough up the money because she told him she wasn't able to get pregnant, and he told her he didn't want to be a father. He, his attorney, and the director of the National Center for Men discuss the lawsuit they filed, known as “Roe v. Wade for Men,” arguing that men should have a constitutional right to avoid fatherhood. Next, Dan says even though he and his wife, Lisa, already have four children, he wants just one more. Lisa has been pregnant on and off for 11 years and says she's closed for baby business. Will Dr. Phil help Dan see Lisa's point that four is enough? Then, a frustrated husband is camping out on the roof of his house and living in a tent. He refuses to go back to his bedroom until his wife moves their kids out of their bed and starts paying more attention to him. Can Dr. Phil get him to come down the ladder? Plus, a sleep expert has a simple method for getting your child to sleep through the night. See the plan in action! Share advice and talk about the show here.

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jostman199

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April 21, 2006, 3:00 pm PDT

04/21 Baby Wars

Quote From: jimmiej

That man should be taken out to the wood shed and slapped silly if he did not want to be a father he should have kept it in his pants or in a condom it was his choice that he did not and now he needs to face the resposibility wheither he wants to or not.

Ok, so long as you say that women that should be taken out to the woodshed and slapped silly if she didn't want to be a mother she shoudl have kept her legs closed or properly used birth control. It was her choice that she didn't and now she can't have an abortion and needs to face the responsibility whether she wants to or not. touche

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sandeequin

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April 21, 2006, 3:00 pm PDT

04/21 Baby Wars

Quote From: mwmitch60

I agree Matt needs to step up and do the right thing. it is part of him as well as her,and it takes two to tango. I see it all around today with high school children ending up being parents at way too young of an age. This is for everyone,even adults you need to think things through,before you do anything. This world is tough enough as it is with out having an unwanted child being thrown into the mix.

I think Matt is being selfish and irresponsibe. His only responsiblity is to pay child support and not worry about taking care of the child. Him paying child support is nothing compared to having to miss work when the child is sick or they have school functions. The amount of child support that is paid is only enough to get certain things it does not pay for everything the children need. If a mother receives $300 for the child and then you compare the amount she pays to maintain a healthy environment for the child you will see that the $300 will not get you very far. Matt needs to grow up and accept that he and only he made the choice by not protecting himself. Like I tell my children you make your bed now lie in it.

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candymom

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April 21, 2006, 3:00 pm PDT

deadbeat dad suck

Im not the kind of person to stand up and say what is on my mind but watching the jerk on todays episode of Baby Wars PISSED ME OFF ! What a loser! Guys like him dont deserve to have a beautiful child in thier life. I hope you grow old and lonely !! I dont know why any girl would want you now. How can you live with yourself after denying your own blood. Men like this should be forced to be steralized!

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riggznit

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April 21, 2006, 3:00 pm PDT

you are absolutely insane

Quote From: tuactress

This man that does not take responsibilty for HIS child is a complete chauvinist. To him, he should be able to "screw 'em and leave 'em" without any reprecussions; his little world strongly resembles the dark ages when women were conisdered property and women were, many times, left alone to take care of the children. In reality, men are supposed to take responsibility for their actions; this man had unprotected sex and believes it is not his problem and his sperm created a baby. That child shares DNA with him and how exactly does he think she will feel when she grows up and realizes "daddy doesn't love me"? As far as blaming his ex for telling him she could not have children and then turing around and having a child, it is not her fault. Every medical doctor in the world could have told her she was infertile but medicine is not always correct; it should be a blessing that she is able to have children. This idiotic pig should get over himself and help pay for the child he created.

What does this have to do with the dark ages think outside of your box. empathy should be taught in schools. The man was lied to and then caught up in her lies. So if someone lies to you and your gullible enough to believe them then your absolutely are responsible? That kind of thinking is from the dark ages look in the mirror before you judge others. Hate breeds hate! Stop the hate and open your heart and mind.

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happy_chic

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April 21, 2006, 3:00 pm PDT

Really?

Quote From: balzacmom

After watching today's show I was absolutely floored that Dr. Phil was less than supportive for the fella fighting for his rights.

About a year ago my cousin was having recreational sex with a young man getting his feet off the ground and working on his career. He was assured by her over this 2 month period that she was on the pill. Guess what.......ooops, she got pregnant.........with twins!!!!! This wasn't her first ooops either, it was her fourth while practicing poor "safe sex" methods. Fortunately, the first 3 ended in miscarriages. This poor guy did not want to have these children as he knew a lifetime committment with my cousin was just not in the picture as she is not an easy person to get along with. So now, he is slapped with $1000/month child support payments and once they enter daycare he will be forking out another $800/month. How's the poor guy to survive? She has NEVER been able to afford to drive a new car and guess what........she's now driving a new one!

I've got 2 boys that are not sexually active yet as well I have a daughter. I often get comments from people saying that they are glad they don't have a girl because they wouldn't want the worry of her getting pregnant. My worries are absolutely the opposite. As my boys are approaching the age of sexuality I will never stop the nagging about being very careful about sex and ALWAYS protecting themselves as one mistake can cost you a lifetime. I worry much more for them than I do our daughter.......at least she's got a choice.

So she had twins? Only after she had had three other miscarriage? How many times does this have to happen for the man to realize she wasn't using safe methods of birth control. He sounds nieve. Like 'duh' she had three misscarriages, but really she is using birth control.

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ilmamma

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April 21, 2006, 3:00 pm PDT

Unprotected Sex

I know a lot of people talk about having unprotected sex, but let me tell you what I think unprotected sex means. It might be a little old fashioned, but I believe that unprotected sex is having sex outside the protective shelter of a marriage. Condoms can break, birth control can fail and can leave people's lives shattered and children feeling unwanted or even aborted. I'm not here to condem anyone, but if we think of sex inside a marriage as being "protected", in all ways. Emotional, spiritual, financial. Its so sad to see this baby with a father who doesn't want her, and that thinks he should have a choice into being a father. Parenthood is a choice, and when you have sex with a partner, even outside of marriage, a baby can be made. Why allow this heartache to happen? Too many babies are growing up out of wedlock without daddies or mommies that can adequetly take care of them. Think people!! These children deserve to be wanted!! You know if this happened to this exact couple if they were married, this would not be an issue. Marriage protects everyone.

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shaynelh

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April 21, 2006, 3:00 pm PDT

paying for the kid

Quote From: japarente

This is to the father that was on the show with his lawyer. This father said that his civil rights were violated by not having a choice in the decision of having a child. He therefore thought that he should not have to pay for his child. His reason was that he did not agree to have a baby, and should therefore not have to pay.

Let's think about it this way: People do not choose to get into a car accident. However, when you drive a car, you know that there is a risk everytime that you get behind the wheel. If a car accident happens, you have to pay. It is not a choice, it is the law. If this guy is going to have unprotected sex, he assumed the risk of pregnancy-regardless of the fact that the woman said she could not get pregnant. Even if he wore a condom (which he did not), he still assums the risk. I can be the best driver in the world, but I assume a risk when I get in the car. I eve assume risk as a passenger in a car. He got this woman pregnant. He must therefore pay for the result. His rights were no more violated then the rights of victims of other "accidents." And to shed a better light on this, no child is an accident. That child was meant to be here. He can choose to not be a part of that child's life-which is his loss-but he must financially pay for the consequences of his actions.

I think that everyone is missing whole point of this show! It's not about payment....$500.00 a month is NOTHING when bringing a child up to adulthood! The point is that this man was so clear about his concerns over becoming a father that SHE should have been more full proof too! Yes condoms break...but she cited 2 reasons for reassuring that he need not worry. Now who suffers? Yup, we pay for accidents...Yup, dad's pay child support..big deal! I am a mom that gets some chump change from my 2 girls' biological dad..but I would rather they had a father to lean on! The mom has short changed this child all the way around..

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ginnie

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April 21, 2006, 3:00 pm PDT

Father's Rights

I was shocked with this gentleman on not having the choice to being a father.

He believed the mother when she said that she couldn't have children, but he still should have taken the responsibility of protecting himself.

If she came out and said that she didn't have a sexual transmitted disease and he didn't wear a condom, he got the STD who's fault would that be?

He did have a choice, and he decided to not protect himself.

The one thing these young adults have to consider when having a sexual relationship is the cost of a package of condom is alot cheaper then the cost of child raising a child or medication for curing an STD.

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sveety04

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April 21, 2006, 3:01 pm PDT

Does anyone care about the baby?

Personally I can sort of see where is man is coming from. However, he could have avoided being a parent if he would have worn a condom. He just trusted that he couldn't get her pregnant and you can't tell me he hasn't heard of other women being told they can't get pregnant and then somehow ending up pregnant. As far as I'm concerned HIS CHOICE was whether or not to wear a condom. Now because HIS CHOICE (of not wearing a condom) made a baby, he wants to put a hole in the judicial system for dead beat dads. Let’s get real… If this guy held his precious daughter in his arms and looked into her eyes for even a second I can guarantee this entire legal BS would end. (And that's really what this entire fight is...total bullsh*t from a DEAD BEAT DAD) Next time he has sex we all know he’ll be wearing a condom.

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shortymama

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April 21, 2006, 3:01 pm PDT

The man not wanting his baby

My kids dad told me he was told he couldn't have kids.I now have 2 kids by him and I take care of them by myself.It is wrong what that man is doing thinking he can just sign everything off.If he is able to do it a bunch of dead beat dads are going to be doing the same thing.The only time my kids dad is around to see them is when he needs something or wants something.I did not give up my babies just because what there dad told me I love them and take care of them every day

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