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Topic : 07/06 Baby Wars

Number of Replies: 7225

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Created on : Thursday, April 13, 2006, 01:22:17 pm

Author : DrPhilBoard1

(Original Air Date: 04/21/06) Being a parent is hard enough, but what happens when Mom and Dad can't agree on how many kids to have, how to raise 'em and how to get ‘em to sleep? Sometimes, it can lead to an all-out baby war! Matt's baby battle ended up in front of a judge and made headlines. He was ordered to pay child support for the baby he had with his ex-girlfriend, but he says he shouldn't have to cough up the money because she told him she wasn't able to get pregnant, and he told her he didn't want to be a father. He, his attorney, and the director of the National Center for Men discuss the lawsuit they filed, known as “Roe v. Wade for Men,” arguing that men should have a constitutional right to avoid fatherhood. Next, Dan says even though he and his wife, Lisa, already have four children, he wants just one more. Lisa has been pregnant on and off for 11 years and says she's closed for baby business. Will Dr. Phil help Dan see Lisa's point that four is enough? Then, a frustrated husband is camping out on the roof of his house and living in a tent. He refuses to go back to his bedroom until his wife moves their kids out of their bed and starts paying more attention to him. Can Dr. Phil get him to come down the ladder? Plus, a sleep expert has a simple method for getting your child to sleep through the night. See the plan in action! Share advice and talk about the show here.

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julie1418

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April 23, 2006, 7:19 pm PDT

04/21 Baby Wars

Quote From: groovy

Matt knew ahead of time what Lauren's post conception choices are. Thus, he could have made preconception choices to avoid or significantly reduce the necessity for post-conception choices he didn't like. Matt knew the rules of the game going in. If he didn't like the rules, then he shouldn't have played the game or he should have worn a uniform.

Right! Whether he agreed with the laws or not, he knew them and is therefore bound by them.

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groovy

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April 23, 2006, 7:21 pm PDT

Lauren, I'm curious...

Quote From: laurenelis

Again, I just want to thank everyone for the support. The primary reason for not being part of the public eye is to keep Elisabeth safe. I thank all of you (again) for your support and prayers. Elisabeth is a beautiful gift from God, and she is dearly loved.

Thank you again.

What do Matt's parents have to say about this? Do they support what their son is doing? Or are they appalled? Do they want any contact with their granddaughter?

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carinidiaz

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April 23, 2006, 7:22 pm PDT

AMEN!!!!!!!

Quote From: stupormom

Women get the lion's share of the choices in this issue because they get the lion's share of the concequences. The day that a man can carry, deliver, and nurse the child, they can have all the choices they please!

AMEN, AMEN, AMEN!!!!!!!!

I have given birth and rasing my 4 beautiful daughters, all natural childbirth and all nursed. When they can do what we do, they can choose. Sorry buddy don't want the chance of having children, then don't play house no matter what she says. Because ultimately whether you wear a condom or not, the chance is there. I was on depo when I got pregnant w/ my 3rd. Contraception is not 100% sure and men need to realize that if they choose to have sex, I do not care how protected it is, they are still choosing the possibility of becoming fathers if a pregnancy is achived.

I hope that this moron looses in court and they DOUBLE up on his child support. If he does not want any part of the child's life, his problem. When he is older and wiser he will realize the screw up that he made! That is a beautiful baby and mom is very pretty. I am sure she can find a real man to be a dad and provide a secure family. However he is not off the hook since he made the choice to have unprotected sex. Nobody put a gun in his head! So pay up buddy- she is only 8 months and 18 is a long time away!!!!!!

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anards

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hopeful

April 23, 2006, 7:34 pm PDT

Thanks groovy

Quote From: groovy

Even if Matt ends up sending his check every month, he's still heartless for refusing to have anything to do with his daughter. I hope the mother ends up finding a great guy who acts as a daddy to this girl. Otherwise, like so many girls without a father, Elisabeth may end up inappropriately seeking male attention & repeating the cycle. Matt has the power to break the cycle, but is too self-centered to do so.

Thank you groovy. I want to see change, I am a hopeful fool, I see that the real victim here is Elisabeth. And yes, even if Matt gives a paycheck (which we know he wont), that little baby could grow up into an insecure young girl, then the "real" problems start: promiscuity, drugs, eating disorders......it's just so obvious to me that this cycle needs to end. I hope that the mom does find love and they create a wonderful, warm and safe home for Elisabeth to grow up in, but I feel that right from the start, Elisabeth has an emotional battle, she will always wonder about her natural father. Its just such a shame. I am ashamed that people like Matt actually exist, to actually think that that kind of a person is out there, it's frightening.

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recpac

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April 23, 2006, 7:42 pm PDT

We support you

Quote From: laurenelis

Thank you again.

Hi Lauren--

I am so sorry for what you are going through. I hope every woman in the world sees the show and that loser will NEVER get another date again! God forbid he gets another woman pregnant. I almost choked when Mel said what a great dad he'd make some day! Yeah, right-- based on how he's acting, I sincerely doubt it. Makes me wonder what kind of parents "wonder boy" himself had. Obviously they forgot to teach him about "actions and consequences".

I applaud your decision to keep your baby and give her a loving home. Your little one is beautiful! What a precious gift from God.

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julie1418

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April 23, 2006, 7:48 pm PDT

Beautiful

Quote From: marydowns

In the game of procreation, I'm sorry fellas there is no "even playing field" because mother nature made the rules and she's not going to change them. You men are the quarterbacks in this game. You throw the ball to us and we run it down field for 9 months to the goal line. Sometimes you throw it to the wrong lady, sometimes we just aren't equipped and can't catch it, or we catch it and drop it! The point is, once that ball leaves your hands, what happens next is out of your control. Many of us agree that it's not fair, but mother nature isn't going to bring us a fair fairy anytime soon. How many young girls would love to pass back their menstrual cramps to their boyfriends... How many wives would like to see their husbands plop down on the birthing bed and relieve them of a few hours of hard labor? I'm not even going to get into the emotional and physical pain of miscarriage, abortion, endometriosis, hysterectomies, etc etc. You see guys, many of us would agree that it would be a wonderful thing for mother nature to equip you with the ability to run that ball down the field yourself. But she's not completely unfair. She gives you some choices: You can choose to hold that ball for a while until the right receiver comes along, you can pass it to any gal and take your chances, you can put on some protective gear so that if one of us isn't following your plays, you won't get injured, or you can opt out and choose not to play this game at all!

and in this game, this quarterback CHOOSES all the receivers on the team.

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anards

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April 23, 2006, 7:48 pm PDT

wow, scary

Quote From: groovy

I didn't know about the huge epidemic of women with guns raping & robbing men for their sperm! (So I guess they're carrying little jars or plastic bags with them to collect all their samples?)

You say it's a fact, it must be so. Thanks for warning us.

Um, men have reproductive rights, it's called abstinence, dont like that one, how about masturbation, dont like that one, how about mutual masturbation, dont like that one, how about condoms, how about doubling up on condoms. Come on, this is ludicrous, women and men both have a responsibility to a future unborn child, it's just that men get away with everything, again, we dont just carry the child to term, we spend the rest of our entire lives fretting with worry, bearing our souls, hearts and minds and spirits, breaking our backs to ensure that they grow up with dignity and consciencious of the world with which they live in. You have to pay child support and sleep well at night while we worry that our babies could be having sex with someone like you, or could get into a car on a road with a drunk driver who decided to drink because his father didnt want him....do you follow this. This has to stop. This screwing around without a care in the world. Most intelligent, educated people who want to wait to have children do so with high success, it's not brain surgery, it's common sense. You have unprotected sex, you will be and should be made responsible. What in the world happened to our value system, are todays men perpetual frat boys....this is just so disheartening. That was a scary post, held at gunpoint? Groovy: I'm glad for the warning too!!!

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lynzev

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confused

April 23, 2006, 8:02 pm PDT

sign it over

why is it not a choice that he sign over his parental rights? Let's not take anyone's rights away from choice. The government should not dictate what a woman can do with her body just because a man wants to get out of acting on his actions. He should be able to step away and not hurt an innocent baby. Some day a man will step up and want this baby and he should be able to be her "daddy". Both the mother and father are at fault, but the father should be able to walk away with his tail between his legs just as the mother is able to. Hey don't think because you have their child they will stick around. And if he doesn't want to, why in the hell would you make him? This mother not only is showing her daughter just how much the father does not want her, but also makes other women look weak. Not in. Neither one is 'right'. Poor little girl. I do not think either party should be able to influence her.

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dadathome

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April 23, 2006, 8:08 pm PDT

This woman spread her leg Trap

and caught this guy for $500 a month for the next 18 years.

Nice Trap Woman.

Typical.

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anards

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April 23, 2006, 8:09 pm PDT

hello,,,,,are you for real?

Quote From: mmhudson

But she made the choice to have the child and raise the child. Why should he be forced to just accept her choice. She does NOT deserve financial support. She made the choice to raise the child. Therefore, she should raise the child by herself. But I wish the CHILD the best. The mother made her own bed, now she needs to lay in it.

"The mother made her own bed now she should lie in it", are you for real? What, was this asexual reproduction? Where is Matt's bed, oh yeah he gets to sleep in his own bed AWAY from HIS baby while Lauren is awake at night RAISING THEIR baby!!!!!!!! I'm curious, are you a parent? This is the most obscene post I have ever read. It takes a lot of courage, heart and selflessness to raise a child. She did not "make a choice to raise the child", as you say. It is a responsibility she did not sherk, which by the way is what Matt is doing. You must live in la la land next to Matt as well. By the way, it's not Lauren who "deserves financial support" as you crudely stated, its THE CHILD who needs it, and its THE FATHERS responsibility to provide it!!!!!! Geez, what is wrong with you people. Money, money, money, no wonder the world is falling apart. Hello, you only have a few short years on earth, why not enjoy them, raise a little family, have some food and laughter and sleep well in life knowing your a decent human being. As a nurse, I see some sad situations, all this talk about money, money, money just makes me literally sick. That poor baby. Matt, the fact that a few people share your point of view is just plain silly. Let the boards go nuts on your ridiculous notions of walking away from your DNA,,,,,,

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