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Topic : 08/07 Big Burden

Number of Replies: 365
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Created on : Friday, April 21, 2006, 10:21:06 am
Author : DrPhilBoard1
(Original Air Date: 04/27/06) Morbid obesity changes the dynamic of two entire families … and tears them apart. DeeDee weighs over 700 pounds and hasn't left her house in more than a year. She has become a burden to her friends and family by constantly demanding their help and company. Is DeeDee ready to get real and make a change, or will she continue to blame her weight gain on other circumstances? Also, her children explain why they resent their mother and feel hostage to her demands. Then, MaLynn is only 14 years old, but she already weighs 419 pounds, and her obesity is causing problems in school. Her mother, Shari, admits she can't say no to her daughter when it comes to food. Dr. Phil shows MaLynn how she can easily lose 86 pounds, and he gets this mother-daughter team to work together to save their relationship and their lives. Talk about the show here.

Find out what happened on the show.

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April 27, 2006, 8:56 am CDT

04/27 Big Burden

Quote From: lgizmo1400

I understand what both of you are saying. You don't just gain 300lbs over night. It happens from being inactive. In 2000 I found out I was pregnant and quite my job because the environment was not healthy for me to be in during my prenancy. I ended up staying home and I am still a stay at home mom. Since then I have gained at least 100lbs since then, most was with my pregancy and I have not been able to loose it. I am a very active person I think. I just have a very crappy metablosim. I have thought about the gastric by pass surgery, but to me that is like cheating on a test it is taking the easy way if I can't loose it now whose to say after the surgery I won't gain it all back and then have had to go through this procedure for nothing. For me if I were to try to go to a gym I would be afraid of all the THIN people laughing at me while I was trying to work out. Being made fun of for trying to loose weight is not a motivativor.
Have you kept a food journal and counted the calories you are actually consuming? Counted every single morsel? Everytime you give your kid a peice of food and you take a nibble?

I used to think I had a crappy metabolism too but I didn't, I was just eating WAY TOO MUCH FOOD!

Also. if you can lose weight weith gastric-by-pass then you can lose weight the normal way. Do you know what gastric by pass does? It limits the number of calories you can take in. It's not magic, it doesn't fix something broken. It doesn't increase your metabolism. It just physically makes it harder to consume so many calories.

So if you can be fixed with GBP then you can lose the weight on your own.
 
April 27, 2006, 8:57 am CDT

04/27 Big Burden

Quote From: sheenie

why does junk food have to taste so damn good though? and why are some of the junk right on the "impulse" aisle at the grocery store while you are waiting on line? Too bad we can't just get rid of all the junk food and fast food places in this society. It wouldn't solve all the problems but it would help!! I know that's a very simplistic view and I know we shouldn't blame our problems on society and we should be able to control ourselve,s but sometimes it is sooo hard to control yourself...
That's why people who lose weight are so awesome. That is why they get attention and that is why the deserve it. They have over come something extremely difficult.

And we shouldn't punish people with self control by removing sweets just because some of us get out of control with it.
 
April 27, 2006, 8:58 am CDT

Eating Disorders

I have not seen the show yet, since it airs here in the afternoon. I have read many of the posts here. Yes, this could be genetics or this can be a hot bed of emotional issue. These have been covered in the discussions. No one pointed out the fact that in *most* typical addictions the abuser can simply stop, walk away, put it down and never go back to the self destructive behavior. However, someone who over eats *cannot* put down food and never touch it again. Nope, you cannot live without food, that's called starving. You *have* to consume food to live. So this becomes a control issue. Controlling what goes in the mouth. Teaching the person good nutrition and exercise techniques. Whether or not the the individual retains what is taught to them is a whole *other* issue to deal with. Overeating is a serious issue with so many deeply rooted *triggers*, that long term analysis may be needed to seek out and destroy/understand those triggers. These people have to be on constant notice that these triggers *are* out there and will foil their efforts if left unchecked. It is a choice between fueling the body or eating for other reasons. Nobody ever said it would be easy, but it can be done. They can do this with support and love from their families and friends and most importantly, support and love for **themselves**. They have a though road to tread and I wish them the best of luck in their *life long* effort in controlling their food intake.
 
April 27, 2006, 8:59 am CDT

04/27 Big Burden

Quote From: zakksmomm

I went to college for Medical Assistant and they explained where certain illness can lead to obesity. Diabetes is hereditary or can be caused by eating too much junk. I see now alot of kids are becoming overweight, getting hypertension and Diabetes Type 2. I blame it on having fast food restaurants on every block. Why do we need McDonald's every few blocks? If in the case that obesity is not hereditary or caused by illness, it is cause people need to get off their lazy butts and excercise. Quit eating so much and start walking, jogging, biking, join a health club, but do something besides sitting around playing video games or watching TV all day. Now, why do we need special parking for pregnant women?When I was expecting, the doctor told me that walking was a benefit to delivery. I had 2 boys and I am still slim, too. I am also 5'3 130 lbs and actually have people saying I'm too thin. I think I am about average.
Still, no one has explained to me how a person's body can gather fat that they are not eating. This DEFIES the laws of physics.

You cannot make matter from nonmatter.  Fat is matter. You cannot get an illness and gain weight from it! You CAN get an illness that makes it hard to lose fat you ALREADY have...but you cannot be eating a healthy low calorie low fat diet and get an illness and gain 80 lbs....sorry. It's IMPOSSIBLE.


 
April 27, 2006, 9:01 am CDT

Be there.

I have been where  her children are.  The only problem is that it is too late for me to help my mother.  My mother died a little over a month ago, weighing over 600lbs, and that is just a guess because our hospital has nothing large enough to weigh her.   My mother was a wonderful caring person.  I miss her so much I can't even express it. 

in 37 years (how long her and my father were married untill she died) my mother went from wieghing 140 to 600lbs.  Almost 2 years ago in June we had our first scare.  She almost died cause her sugar was over 1000 and we had no clue she was diabetic. When she went in it took 6 men to get her in the ambulance and then she was transported to a hospital where they could take care of someone her size and that is where we found out she was about 570lbs.  It was a long road to get her back home, She left the hospital weighing 470.  She had lost 100lbs. She was doing great, but then it started again, She became a hurmit. Stayed in her bedroom all the time, my father making her meals and bringing them too her.  It got so bad to the end that she would be calling us kids to come over and do things as simple as get her lunch or get her insulin for her because she could not walk out to th litchen which is abouta 50ft walk.  She had gain back all her wieght plus more sence leaving the hospital.

The day she died it took 8 men to get her in the ambulance.  And later I found out that they had to call the fire department in to remove her from the hospital to the funeral home.  We cremated her because the casket would have been to expensive cause it would have had to been specialy made for her and triple the size.  My mother never liked people looking at her anyways so it was the best thing for her.

I guess my point is that she needs to do something today because there may not be a tomorrow. My mother could have had many more years with us if she would have done more to lose the weight. And this mother needs to do more so she can be there for her children and grandchildren.  My youngest was 7 months old when she pasted and will never get to know what a wonderful grandmother he had. But I am sure going to tell her how much she loved her.  I

Walking into the hospital that night I was thinking that this is it, I am not going to stand by anymore and let her kill herself , I was going to tell her she needed to do something and she needed to do it now, but it was too late. I never had that chance, but these kids do.  I really hope she takes Dr. Phils help now, before it is too late.
 
April 27, 2006, 9:21 am CDT

Hypothyroidism

Quote From: purplepain

Still, no one has explained to me how a person's body can gather fat that they are not eating. This DEFIES the laws of physics.

You cannot make matter from nonmatter.  Fat is matter. You cannot get an illness and gain weight from it! You CAN get an illness that makes it hard to lose fat you ALREADY have...but you cannot be eating a healthy low calorie low fat diet and get an illness and gain 80 lbs....sorry. It's IMPOSSIBLE.


This can cause the weight gain.
 
April 27, 2006, 9:29 am CDT

04/27 Big Burden

Quote From: mulana

I have been where  her children are.  The only problem is that it is too late for me to help my mother.  My mother died a little over a month ago, weighing over 600lbs, and that is just a guess because our hospital has nothing large enough to weigh her.   My mother was a wonderful caring person.  I miss her so much I can't even express it. 

in 37 years (how long her and my father were married untill she died) my mother went from wieghing 140 to 600lbs.  Almost 2 years ago in June we had our first scare.  She almost died cause her sugar was over 1000 and we had no clue she was diabetic. When she went in it took 6 men to get her in the ambulance and then she was transported to a hospital where they could take care of someone her size and that is where we found out she was about 570lbs.  It was a long road to get her back home, She left the hospital weighing 470.  She had lost 100lbs. She was doing great, but then it started again, She became a hurmit. Stayed in her bedroom all the time, my father making her meals and bringing them too her.  It got so bad to the end that she would be calling us kids to come over and do things as simple as get her lunch or get her insulin for her because she could not walk out to th litchen which is abouta 50ft walk.  She had gain back all her wieght plus more sence leaving the hospital.

The day she died it took 8 men to get her in the ambulance.  And later I found out that they had to call the fire department in to remove her from the hospital to the funeral home.  We cremated her because the casket would have been to expensive cause it would have had to been specialy made for her and triple the size.  My mother never liked people looking at her anyways so it was the best thing for her.

I guess my point is that she needs to do something today because there may not be a tomorrow. My mother could have had many more years with us if she would have done more to lose the weight. And this mother needs to do more so she can be there for her children and grandchildren.  My youngest was 7 months old when she pasted and will never get to know what a wonderful grandmother he had. But I am sure going to tell her how much she loved her.  I

Walking into the hospital that night I was thinking that this is it, I am not going to stand by anymore and let her kill herself , I was going to tell her she needed to do something and she needed to do it now, but it was too late. I never had that chance, but these kids do.  I really hope she takes Dr. Phils help now, before it is too late.
I'm so sorry you and your mother and your whole family went through that. That is heart breaking. Your mother must have been really hurting inside. My thoughts are with you, this was a recent loss for you. I wish I could say something better.  My heart breaks just reading your post.
 
April 27, 2006, 9:30 am CDT

04/27 Big Burden

Quote From: purplepain

Still, no one has explained to me how a person's body can gather fat that they are not eating. This DEFIES the laws of physics.

You cannot make matter from nonmatter.  Fat is matter. You cannot get an illness and gain weight from it! You CAN get an illness that makes it hard to lose fat you ALREADY have...but you cannot be eating a healthy low calorie low fat diet and get an illness and gain 80 lbs....sorry. It's IMPOSSIBLE.


Sometimes a metabolism shuts down and a person can consume as low as 800 calories and gain weight. Metabolism enables your body to burn food as fuel and a persons who metabolism has slowed down no longer burns the food as fuel but instead the body stock piles it as in fat. This happens a lot with people who yo yo diet. Those that restrict calories in order to loose weight ie starvation diets. The body has a natural defense for starvation it stores food as fat. Hope that helps.
 
April 27, 2006, 9:33 am CDT

Hypothyriod

I know your rolling your eyes! :) I've been struggling with this for 3 years now and it's a b....!
 
April 27, 2006, 9:36 am CDT

04/27 Big Burden

Quote From: daylily42

It's amazing to me that the show hasn't even aired yet, but this board has already erupted into a witch hunt of the morbidly obese.  I'm so glad that those of you out there who have a pathological need to feel superior to someone can get this out of your systems.  Cheer up, folks:  At least there's still someone you can still openly hate. 

  

If this were a show about an anorexic woman on the brink of death, few if any of you would be saying that it is her own fault, or why can't she just think clearly about her situation and her health. 

  

I just hope that those of you who are on a mission to air their superiority to this woman and those in a similarly unhappy predicament will consider one point:  You have to eat.  You have to nourish your body.  It's impossible to go "cold turkey" on food except through a fasting diet, and those have been widely discredited.  Yes, gastric bypass surgery is on option, but it is a radical choice.  And unfortunately, without the behavioral commitment, even the benefits of gastric bypass surgery can be undone. 

  

Every person alive has made unwise choices.  Every person alive has done things contrary to common sense, good health, self-preservation.  This woman, whatever her story, has suffered for her choices.  She also seems to have blurred the line and inflicted those choices on her loved ones.  So please get over your self-righteous need to be superior to her and consider her as an individual who needs help in undoing the choices she has made.  Personally, I believe extreme obesity is a form of self-mutiliation, a desire to annihilate the self and anesthetize feelings with food.  I also believe this dynamic is very complex and can only be reversed with much commitment and care.  It's possible, but it's extremely difficult. 

  

And those of you who are fortunate enough not to have this problem should show some understanding and compassion, rather than using this message board as a place to air your hatred. 

I certainly hope you aren't talking about me. I am not on a witch hunt for obese people. I AM OBESE! I just want people to get real about what they are doing to themselves instead of searching the globe for excuses.

I agree with you completely about extreme obesity being a form of self mutilation. Even "normal" obesity is. I gained most of my weight during a deep depression that I would cut myself during. I would also eat too much food and it felt good to know I was hurting myself, making myself ugly. I hated myself and eating was a great way to hurt myself.

I just don't want people to get all comfy cozy blaming their fat on genetics or disease (some people DO have a legit disease that makes it hard to LOSE weight, I'm not talking about them) and sit back and keep eating burgers. That is a huge lie they are telling themselves and people around here are supporting that.

If you weren't talking about me, sorry for getting defensive.
 
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