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Topic : 07/18 Dr. Phil's Mooch Squad

Number of Replies: 191
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Created on : Friday, April 21, 2006, 10:25:27 am
Author : DrPhilBoard1
(Original Air Date: 04/28/06) Dr. Phil sends his Mooch Squad to round up some accused family freeloaders! Regina and Earl are beyond frustrated with their 22-year-old son, Derek, who has moved out and back home twice. Paying Derek's expenses and supporting him and his pets costs them over $2,100 a month! After sneaking out a window to escape the Mooch Squad, Derek begins an eight-hour negotiation with his parents. Does he eventually agree to sign Dr. Phil's behavioral agreement? Then, Adele says her 25-year-old son, Ryan, lives on her couch, demands that she cook dinner and serve it to him, lies to her, and has ruined her financially. Ryan admits he's the king of all moochers and says his blue eyes can mesmerize people into giving him what he wants. Can Dr. Phil convince these moochers to require more of themselves, or is it up to the parents to stop the handouts? Share your thoughts, join the discussion.

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April 28, 2006, 7:20 am CDT

Not a tough one

Quote From: jaxxxxxx

In gender theory there is a concept which applies here.

We should all know that in our society, as it exists, males have duties without rights. Females have both rights and duties. Theory says that some males handle the size and scope of the double standard by doing nothing: By being mooches ...

Now, I think there is something to the theory. It is certainly NOT the only reason ... but may well be the majority cause of the problem we see in some young men. As others have stated, spoiling can create the same apparent reaction.

Given theory is correct (and I think there is a lot to it) then the solution of forcing these young men into responsibility will back fire and create more problems. For the spoiled, Dr. Phil's push should work, for the protesters, Dr. Phil's push should back fire CREATING MORE problems.

Now, I'm not in any way saying that passivity is the answer! Never! Yet, it does appear that simply refusing to get involved is the solution (bad as it is) chosen by a goodly number of young men.

Thus, we face a problem which is more complex than it appears. Add in that there are a goodly many women who will answer this post with contempt for all males and the problem gets so complex that it may well be non-fixable. We may well be stuck with having to live with a percentage of male moochers which is too high for anyone's comfort. A solution which actually works will involve more than simply pushing ... it must also include action to change the public meme.

Our society is what it is. Bad or good, society simply is. We need to look at things as they are and react accordingly.

Please. Put aside all theories. When people are forced to either live or die by working or not working, the will to survive takes center stage. If you deprive anyone of  free housing, clothing and food, they WILL step up and do their best to win the fight. It's simply human nature.  

  

This is not brain surgery. We parents create 99.9% of these messes with our children (out of what we BELIEVE is compassion). Our good intentions doom what should be our future leaders. Give anyone a job who hasn't worked and allow them to feel how great it feels to earn one's own way thru life. There is NO better feeling than that! And it's the best GIFT we can give our young! 

 
April 28, 2006, 7:24 am CDT

NO MORE MOOCHER SHOWS

Dr. Phil, you could have a show on child moochers 24/7 and that wouldn't be enough. There are just some parents (too many) who don't get that they are doing a disservice to their children by allowing them to be lazy, selfish and spoiled. What lessons for life have they taught them???? No landlord or employer would put up with their ways!!! Mom and Dad (and all such moms and dads) are harming their kids. Their good intentions are dooming their futures and ours...as a society.  

  

You don't  need the moochers on the stage. You need just the parents!!!! Once the parents are RE-TAUGHT, then they can pass what they've learned onto their lazy, selfish kids. These kids do what they do BECAUSE THEY"RE ALLOWED TO DO IT! 

  

There needs to be a guidebook on how to parent!!! Or, simply, have my parents (survivors of the Great Depression) teach them a thing or two. Those who started with nothing KNOW how to raise strong, smart, ambitious and appreciative children!!! Thank you, God, for my bright parents!!!!! 

 
April 28, 2006, 7:46 am CDT

Mooch Squad

I feel bad for the parents.  They don't know how to say NO!!!   

  

I love watching!!  Keep up the good work. 

  

sharon 

 
April 28, 2006, 8:26 am CDT

Parental behavior early in life can lead to mooching

I think that parental behavior that conributes to mooching begins when children are very young.  It will be no surprise to me if the 6 year old boy I babysit for turns into a moocher in 15 years.  His parents willingly put his shoes on him every morning.  All he has to say is "get me a milk" and they immediately bring him a glass of milk. While I enable him to be able to take care of himself, unfortunately, I can't accomplish very much in a few hours per week.  At every stage of development, parents need to teach their children what it means to be responsible! 
 
April 28, 2006, 8:27 am CDT

MY FAMILY COULD USE THE MOOCH SQUAD

MY BROTHER-IN-LAW AND HIS WIFE HAVE A SON WHO IS 21 YEARS OLD , SINCE HE GRADUATED HIGH SCHOOL HE WORKED A TOTAL OF 1 JOB FOR ABOUT 3 WEEKS.  THIS YOUNG MANS DAY IS GETTING OUT OF BED ABOUT 4PM GOING TO HIS FRIEND'S HOUSE PLAYING VIDEO GAMES COMING HOME AT 6 AM TO GO TO BED AND THAT'S ABOUT IT.  SOMETIMES ON THE WEEKENDS HIS FRIENDS ( WHO DO GO TO COLLEGE AND HAVE JOBS) WILL WANT TO GO TO THE MOVIES,  ANDY WILL GET MONEY FROM HIS MOM OR DAD.  HE ALSO WILL PLAY TEXAS HOLDEM WHEN HIS DAD WILL PAY FOR HIM TO GET INTO A TOURNAMENT.  THE FATHER HAS TRIED TO KICK HIM OUT SEVERAL TIMES BUT MOM WON'T ALLOW IT.  MY MAJOR CONCERN IS THE INFLUENCE IT HAS ON HIS 15 YR OLD SISTER WHO DEFENDS EVERYTHING HE DOES AND LOOKS ON HIM AS A HERO.
 
April 28, 2006, 8:49 am CDT

moochers

Dr. Phil, I watch your show all the time and have seen other shows on moochers, and they really irk me. I was widowed at age 31, with 2 sons age 3 and 5. They are 30 and 28 now and I am very proud of them. From the time they were 15 and could get a work permit, they have paid their own way.They have never ask me for $1. They paid their car payments, insurance,repairs,gas,etc. I think that  comes from good parenting. When I see these parents on your show I think they are getting what they deserve. I would have loved to be able to help them financially over the years, I just wasn't able. Therefore they  grew  to be responsible, hard working adults. They are both married and now I have two beautiful loving "daughters" with the same great qualities.  Thank you (I love your show).   Anita
 
April 28, 2006, 8:53 am CDT

I can't believe this!

I can't believe the attitude of these guys on this show!  Whether they have been spoiled all their life or not you would think they would now love their mothers enough to want to take some burdeon off them.  I grew up in a blue collar family and started working part time when I was 16.  At that time since I had my own money (only minimum wage which I think was about 3.30 then-early 80s) I started buying my own clothes, my own gas, etc.  When I became a senior I was the one who paid for those really expensive senior pictures and I paid to go to  the beach on my senior trip.  I did this out of love for my father.  I had seen him work so hard all my life to take care of me and my brother and when I was able to take some pressure off him or in some way make his life easier I was glad to have that opportunity- because I loved him that much.  I can't believe these guys.  I really can't.
 
April 28, 2006, 9:38 am CDT

Family Pets

Hi Dr.Phill,and Staff:  

                                    Mouchers;Well ,my sister has the same problem as those on your show today.I turned up the volume on my tv hopeing they would all hear about the mouching.Not only that ,its thier lazyness,and no self motivation.well never the less when they heard what todays show was on they all disapeared.They know,and getting away with it.maybe a survival trip into the wilderness could help these young talented adults relize nothing is free.help them relize it makes you feel better about yourself when you earn what you got,and where your going.  

  

                                                                                                                                    Sincerly;  

                                                                                                                                                   Michael Born  

  

  

  

  

  

  

                                                                                                                                          Portcrane,N.Y  

 
April 28, 2006, 9:42 am CDT

04/28 Dr. Phil's Mooch Squad

Quote From: jaxxxxxx

In gender theory there is a concept which applies here.

We should all know that in our society, as it exists, males have duties without rights. Females have both rights and duties. Theory says that some males handle the size and scope of the double standard by doing nothing: By being mooches ...

Now, I think there is something to the theory. It is certainly NOT the only reason ... but may well be the majority cause of the problem we see in some young men. As others have stated, spoiling can create the same apparent reaction.

Given theory is correct (and I think there is a lot to it) then the solution of forcing these young men into responsibility will back fire and create more problems. For the spoiled, Dr. Phil's push should work, for the protesters, Dr. Phil's push should back fire CREATING MORE problems.

Now, I'm not in any way saying that passivity is the answer! Never! Yet, it does appear that simply refusing to get involved is the solution (bad as it is) chosen by a goodly number of young men.

Thus, we face a problem which is more complex than it appears. Add in that there are a goodly many women who will answer this post with contempt for all males and the problem gets so complex that it may well be non-fixable. We may well be stuck with having to live with a percentage of male moochers which is too high for anyone's comfort. A solution which actually works will involve more than simply pushing ... it must also include action to change the public meme.

Our society is what it is. Bad or good, society simply is. We need to look at things as they are and react accordingly.

Dispite all your "thus's" and "goodly's" men do not lack rights. Men do not lack anything.  Your anger at women in general is very clear.

This has nothing to do with gender rolls and please stop making everything about how the poor males are victims of all the powerful women of the world.

There is no meme. You can't just claim there is one and it be so!

This is about spoiled people who are milking their parents for all they are worth. This is a leaving the nest issue...NOT a gender issue.
 
April 28, 2006, 10:50 am CDT

04/28 Dr. Phil's Mooch Squad

 I think a lot of people would consider me a moocher, because I don't work. right now.  I haven't had a job in two years and have been in and out of college.  I try to send out at least one resumé a day to any secretarial work that I'm REMOTELY qualified to do.  In the summer I'm supposed to babysit 8-10 hours a day for 125.00  a month.   Which will end up going straight to my medications.  So I"m looking for a better job. RIght now I live on about $60.00 a week (including groceries) plus gas money that my dad gives me for driving him home from work  everyday.

I take care of my mom's rental property, where I live with 2 other people and take care of collecting rent and getting things taken care of when they break.

I've worked at : a girl scout camp, video store, thrift store, a factory (2 weeeks of that) and a restuarant but I need a career now. Something where I can get health insurance and that's what I'm looking for.    I have seriousl medical issues that REQUIRE me to get a job with healthcare benefits or I can't work effecitvely. I"m lucky if I can concentrate for 2-3 hours and stay awake most of the time when I don't have my medications.

So some of us aren't moochers because we want to be.  Sometimes life and circumstances just happen and you have to do what you can.
 
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