Topic : Spanking: Useful or Cruel?

I'm being attacked by a sadistic group who I stood up to here. You obviously consider  

beating with hard objects til children scream to be spankings. I saw people who didn't  

hit that hard destroy people and ruin them. A lot of people too. So you are either ignorant  

of large groups of people or are sadists wh rationalize the real impact ,now or in the future.  

I'm 60 and never saw any control from it just the Adult lives ruined and entirely often.   

Have some of you changed your views or are you different ones now.  Lying about the  

impact harms a lot of people. People have actially criminally neglected and left children  

with felons a lot in the last few years. They could do better there but violence is not what you  

pretend. It is mostly destroying children mentally or brutalizing physically.  They need  

drugs after you tramatize them and prevent communication of emotional statis.   

This may be a get a long board but your group in the real world are sadists. When they   

get drunk they hit on people including spouses with boards. They are Powermad manic harrassers.  

I never found a level that was fit to do. Shame on you for lying in such tramatizing areas.   

The creaps actially discuss how to scare kids out of their mind for perfect control.( to drugs or crime). Well if this group is promoting violence as harmless they like to beat people for pleasure  

so it isn't my group. No human feeling group be dammed!   

I AM COMING ON STRONG BUT SO MANY HITLER DEMON SPOUSE-BASHERS WERE  

MADE WITH CRIMINAL CONTEMPT FOR ALL LIFE ON EARTH, BY VIOLENCE, THAT RESPECTING  

THEM IS CONTEMPT FOR DECENT PEOPLE, WHO MEAN NO HARM TO OTHERS. IT  

MAKES IT AWFULLY HARD TO SURVIVE IF YOUR NOT A MONSTER. THAT WAS AT ORANGE  

AND RED LEVELS. TOO MANY FOR ME TOO PROMOTE VIOLENCE. WHY AREN'T THERE ANY  

NONVIOLENCE PEOPLE ON THIS SITE AND WHY DO YOU ASSUME CHILDREN WHO ARE  

BAD ARE TREATED NON-VIOLENTLY. I NEVER FOUND THAT TO BE TRUE. PEOPLE RUINED  

THEM AND THEN IGNORED EVERYTHING THEY DID PRETENDING THEY WERE TREATED  

TO WELL. THE ADULTS ATE THEIR SPOUSES AND ALWAYS BASHED THEM, WERE SCREAMERS  

AND BULLED CHILDREN WHO BEHAVED, AS WIMPS. VIOLENCE IS NOT ONLY OVERRATED  

BUT A HORRIBLE VICE. THE ADULTS HAD RAGE PROBLEMS THAT RUINED EVERYONE. NIGHTMARE  

I am only 16 years old but even as young as I am I completely disagree with spanking a child. I have to say I dont agree with spanking because of the way it took over my father and i ended up being abused and now have to take weekly consuling. Im not saying every parent is like this or that any parent that does spank is abusive. What I am saying is that its better to be safe than sorry. Whenever I look back on the times my father called spanking I dont see a loving lesson I see a cruel act of a parent taking out emotions and frustrain out on a child for something that child did that the parent didnt like. I realize this is coming from my own feelings from my childhood, but sometimes it seems like parents dont understand how damaging spanking really is to a child, even harmless spankings. It really takes a toll and even if it doesnt show up in their behavior right away it is the reason some kids drop out of high school or do drugs. Granted even kids who have never been spanked in their lives also do this but the majority is kids that were abused or spanked as a chid so parents i would really really think the next time you go to spank your child, just stop and think 'how will this affect my child in the future'? The answer could be horrifiying! 

To anyone who reads this I wish to convey my point of view with the intent of not offending anyone... 

It is not the words 'spanking or Abuse' that is the issue here... 

It is the ACTION and AFFECT of a raising hand that is the issue... 

As adults we underestimate the learning ability of a child and the sub conscious minds ability of recall... 

The sub conscious mind is a very powerful part of our minds and as we develop into adults it is what we are primarily lead by...it's likened to the CPU in our computers...there are many research papers and web sites on this subject. 

If we can teach children to feed themselves, dress themselves, and perform all the functions of human behaviour then it can be said we can teach them to raise their hands when they are frustrated, angry or otherwise.  Children and adults have the ability to recall as it termed in psyche terms...Learned Behaviour...

Children of today are very intelligent and teaching them Positive Behaviour as opposed to Non Positive Behaviour is a Challenge and like all jobs, parenting requires research, reading and trial and error. 

I don't personally agree with 'Raising a Hand' at a Child or at an Adult...only in self defense...hence the reason I study with respect Martial Arts...for the purpose of Self Defense...and the techniques used are blocking not striking.  

I don't condemn anyone who spanks their child I see it as learned behaviour and as a form of communication that can be unlearned or adjusted at the persons discretion...free will and choice.   

I see it like this Hands are for Holding, Helping and Healing...we can put any label on it...to me touching another person to adjust a behaviour feels wrong...and at 35 I have learned to communicate verbally and I even know when to walk away and compose myself...I taught myself self control and have researched and still do human behaviour and the complexities of them…ie…learning styles, communication, special needs..etc etc having come from a background where I discipline was not gentle and education and understanding of our differences was very much the opposite... 

Yes I was spanked, then slapped and it got worse then it was my emotions and my mind...unfortunately some parents don't know when to stop, it also confused the words...'I love you' and lead me into many relationship with 'abusive' partners until I sought counseling and healing and broke the pattern.  Through my journey I have learnt forgiveness, understanding and acceptance that what happened to me was through learned behaviour and others’ individual issues that had not been dealt with.  What saddened me the most was the loss of TRUST... 

We are all different in many ways; some are more sensitive than others and you NEVER know the sensitivity level that lies below the surface of anyone you meet or bring into this world.  Out of respect children generally don't say much or talk back, sometimes  also it's in fear of being struck again...Some children will block out hurt feelings associated with physical discipline and this can and generally will surface at some stage later in their adult life…and that can come in many forms…

One person may give a quick pop on the backside and the person who received the pop…may pop a little harder at the next and so on and so on…too think we know children and how they will act as adults or what their definition of a hard or soft spanking is saying they are ‘us’(the adult raising them)…when in true fact…they are their own person…you are as much of a stranger to them as they are too you…(I wouldn’t like a complete stranger to touch me because they were having difficulty communicating with me…it’s not something I would appreciate)  regardless of how well you teach a person…each human has free will and choice and once we all know we have that anything can happen…I am in mind set of teaching a child to know themselves, not be a clone of who I am simply because they can’t be…it did take two too make them…a child who knows themselves has personal power…and learning respect for others and their differences is very important and goes a long way in building relations and TRUST with others…

I will leave it here and wish you all well with your parenting…Children are wonderful, they have so much to teach us…as it is said…we are all teaches and we are all students…age doesn’t enter in the equation of human growth and learning…we all have something to offer…being conscious and aware can be very rewarding and also very confronting…all mis-takes are forgivable…we are all human and all doing the best we can…

With Kind Regards and Peace

Sugajazz 

wow...is all i have to say about all of these things i read on here.... 

heres my story... 

1. To use wrongly or improperly; misuse: abuse alcohol; abuse a privilege.
2. To hurt or injure by maltreatment; ill-use.
3. To force sexual activity on; rape or molest.
4. To assail with contemptuous, coarse, or insulting words; revile.
5. Obsolete. To deceive or trick

now if u find the definition for the word spanking it will say... 

1. Informal. Exceptional of its kind; remarkable.
2. Swift and vigorous: a spanking pace.
3. Brisk and fresh: a spanking breeze.
4. Used as an intensive: a spanking clean shirt.
5. A number of slaps on the buttocks delivered in rapid succession, as for punishment.

take that and let it sink in 

violence is mental abuse and for some Physical brutalizing. It destroys love,trust hope,positive. 

It is physically torturing kids mentally& emotionally, often to an emotional breakdown.It is  

accumulated spankings and burnout . If you were hit twice it would hurt your feelings. You can't get 

affection starved kids in a well of pain, for years, that requires drugs to climb out if you just hurt peoples feelings. It is preventing survival emotionally (mental Abuse). It also causes Spousal  etc. 

I also keep seeing overkillout there. Hitting with hard objects. The consciousless relatives were 

done that way. I'm glad you did alright but I have read thousands of similar descriptions and ruination. It is why people take the time to bring up details. But not everyone has the same experiences so they don't comprehend  it. I am actually one of a trillion people. I am being attacked 

by a vicious neighbor lately so I came on. But I think this site has people who had a better life 

and they think i am rare or just exaggerating ,but I'm common out there. This show is inciting battering out there from rough people.  Too a violent people. Ok I'm glad you all did better and can live in a safe world. But several generations showed me that It goes bad fast.Spanking is using the wrong word. The impact of violence is Mental abuse and emotional burnout that requires years to recover from often. That is why a lot of people are anti-violent.