Quote From: krtklthnkr Hi Groovy, I appreciate your response. My problem with what's going on here is that we have to trust that or assume that - the therapists will be delving into "that". When in all reality here why can't we just get right to it? I watched in horror not too many episodes ago when Dr. Phil talked to a family about this psychopathic daughter who had turned the family upside down and THEY got raked over the coals for things, not her. I could tell the father and mother weren't buying it and I was actually very proud of them, especially the father because he wasn't having what Dr. Phil was selling. And of course the daughter was smiling because she did exactly what the father said she would do - she manipulated things into her favor. Wasn't hard.
When people have "had enough", they have a right to - draw the line and be absolutely DONE. And noooo, it' doesn't make them bad. It makes them - smart. They have a right to run out of patience, love, forgiveness, trust and energy. And what I hear Dr. Phil saying these days is - get into counseling, it's not 100% your fault, there's some good in there somewhere and we will find it, etc., etc. Well maybe, there isn't any good in there, Dr. Phil. Maybe..........psychopaths are void of all that. And maybe you need to read up psychopathy and narcisissim. You can't change them, fixt them or help them. They are what they are. Pure and simple. About the only thing you can do is say goodbye to them. Get them out of your life, identify what they are and get the heck away from them and don't dance - anymroe, absolutely ever.
We've been sold a rotten bill of goods since time immortal about "there's some good in everyone". All i can say to that is - well..........for one you're a hypocrite because when one of these people hurt you or yours then - they are absolutely wicked all of a sudden and the boundaries go down in concrete. So why then...........is it...............that................the rest of us have to put up with these people and give them "one more chance" and go BACK into counseling or go to at least a counselor that's Dr. Phil approved? I don't get it.
Actually I do get it. If we don't serve people like this, if the little people don't make themselves available to them to be "food" then the people in their ivory towers might have to come down and see what reality is. Some of thsee people on this show should never be courted into counseling at all because it's a waste of time, hope, energy and money. They can't be fixed. AND you've already had enough information to compute what they will do in the future based on what they have done - in the past. So once again we are to be taken by - the con artist - one more time? Why?
It just amazes me to no end that we can talk about this and that disorder and yet - no one ever talks about psychopathy and how rampant it really is and how many successful people - that are actually very good at it - aren't in prison at all. They never get caught. They are very charming, extremely maniuplative, start studying you the minute they lay eyes on you and yet - we seem to be - so very ignorant about their existence. Why is that?
I'll tell you why. Because people like having ........someone do the dirty work for them. They need someone who will let them do something illicit now and then and supposedly provide the way for them to do it and supposedly keep it a secret. Of course, no such things are - free.
Then when you are bed with them, when they do whatever it is you want them to do because you happen to be burdened with a conscience, then you find out that - you're in bed iwth a snake and what once cost you a dollar how now tripled in price, plus alot of pain to go along with it.
That's why you see so many people turn their heads to abuse for example. They can't talk, they can't tell because they are in bed with a psychopath - somewhere along the way. So they just act like - they don't know and they don't see and "just now" we are learning about abuse.......... Pleaseeeee. Spare me that one. It's nauseating.
We only turn away because basically mankind hates it's own ability to have a conscience. We don't like it at all. We rather detest it. It gets in the way of things. And if you want proof on that one, study history. Everyone who had one, became a hero and brilliant mind - hundreds of years "later", but while they lived - they were persecuted, tortured, died penniless, thrown out of society and often murdered. Then we cloak ourselves in religion so that we can stand our own stink and talk about how holy it is to be a martyr. I mean HELLO People!!! God would want this?????.
Nothing worse than believing one's own lies, huh? Rather pathetic actually. And yet, the very thing that separates us from the other mammals is that - we are aware of ourselves. But "are we"?
The fact of the matter is - IF we were so aware of ourselves, we wouldn't be talking about how we're "just now" finding out about abuse and what it is and how to deal with it. That's laughable really. How long have we been on the planet and just "now" we get this one?
So why we don't get tough with the real predators in our midst is a tricky question. One that begs to be asked on many fronts. Hm,m,m..... I can't speak up because he did an illicit deal for me. And I can't speak up because I might lose my house and all my lovely things, and I can't speak up because people might talk about me and I might look bad and on and on it goes......
We pass laws but then - molestors and rapists and murderers get out in how many years or months? We house them in places like Big Bear, CA for example, where people come with their familiies and the prey is very plentiful. How many sexual predators are there per square foot? That happens by accident? We protect their rights and yet - we actually position them in front of their prey and make it easy for them. This is an accident or an oversight? I don't think so.
I think one of the things we instinctively know is that we need to give predators what they want. So we push our innocent children, our brightest and our best in front of them because we are cowards and we lie profusely to ourselves. We say - take them, not me...... But the predators always swing back around for them.............it's inevitable. Psychopaths turn on each other as well. They can only group together in a gang - for so long.
But as long as we think that..........there are only a "few" psychopaths out there running around, people without any empathy at all and aren't able to critically think and identify what we see when we see it - then we just become food and fodder. We are the worker bees, the slaves and the drones.
I'll leave you with one hopeful thought. Psychopaths don't possess something that empathetic people DO. They aren't intuitive. They can only study - what you "do". They don't have feelings that are apart from them feeling pain so they can't really read you like you think they can. If you act like a victirm, well sure. Duh. They can read that from a mile off. But if you learn to be wise, learn to back off and see what someone DOES rather than what they SAY and read - that and then act accordingly without giving them all your vulnerabilities, history, thoughts and feelings so they can BECOME whatever it is that will con you - then you "might" have a chance against them.
Of course, they count on you being nothing more than a programmable machine and so far from what I see lately - the food is plentiful.
Have faith, don't reason, don't ask questions, accept everything at face value, seek the group and the herd mentality, fear all authority and cling to those who have huge egos and little brains. That will ensure tthat you will be the feast on someone's table at some point. And i have to add - you not only deserve it - but you requested it.
I'd love to be gentle here but I look around me here and it's like - are we all being poisoned with our water or what? I don't even care if I make people angry here. I hope I do. Sometimes it takes that, when your cage gets rattled and you have to challenge alot of things that you've just believed on faith or followed along after without ever really examining. Dare to Critically Think.
*Trusting the therapists Dr. Phil assigns: When Dr. Phil sends someone to a nutritionist, personal trainer, doctor, treatment program etc. I trust he has good referrals who know what they're doing. Any competant therapist is going to delve into Linda's childhood & father-situation to get at why she's hellbent of staying with her homicidal abuser. Even if Dr. Phil had gotten into that, it's doubtful he would have made her understand the folly of her belief system in such a short period of time. I think he went for the greatest impact with showing her Eddie's cold lies & pointing out to her that she was a victim of pre-meditated murder who just didn't die.
* Sociopaths: We're on the same page re. sociopaths. The public absolutely needs to have a greater awareness of sociopaths. Here's how I began my Amazon review of "The Sociopath Next Door":
"I've written many five-star reviews, but never have I been so motivated to try to convince everyone to read the book. Here's why: one in twenty-five Americans is a sociopath, a figure psychologist Martha Stout obtained from three journal articles and a U.S. government source. Assuming this premise of The Sociopath Next Door is correct, or even if the figure is say one in 50, odds are you know at least one sociopath. He or she could be an abusive partner, the person in the next cubicle at work, your landlord, or the person your teenager is dating. Even if you can't think of sociopath you know, you have high odds of encountering one. Given the havoc even one sociopath can wreak in one's life, this book provides a sort of insurance that you'll be able to identify him or her and deal with that person so they don't harm you emotionally, financially, or in any other way. This is a well-written and well-researched book that I think will benefit the 96% of you who are not sociopaths."
* Re. Dr. Phil sending sociopaths to treatment even though they are untreatable - Dr. Phil is not with his guests long enough to determine who's a sociopath & who is not. Nor does he do the proper assessments, nor is his psychology license active. It's better that he send all the potential sociopaths to licensed mental health professionals & let them make the assessment.
They’re slapped, beaten and bruised. Sometimes, the violence doesn’t end until they’re dead. Dr. Phil talks to women who say they are the victims of abuse and need an intervention before it’s too late. Michelle says her boyfriend, Ryan, flies off the handle over the smallest issues. She reveals that he began hitting her when she was pregnant with their son. Ryan says he can’t control his anger because his own dad was abusive with him as a child. Is it too late for Ryan to change? Then, Linda says her fiancé, Eddie, shot her in the eye and nearly killed her when she threatened to leave him. He’s now serving only four years in prison because, Linda says, she lied to the police and called the shooting accidental. Her mom, Jody, says she’s sickened that Linda still cares for the man who almost took her life. Will Linda stop loving the man who shot her and learn how to have healthy relationships? Talk about the show here.
