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Topic : 08/09 A Mother's Rage

Number of Replies: 4573
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Created on : Friday, May 05, 2006, 06:58:58 am
Author : DrPhilBoard1
(Original Air Date: 05/08/06) Karen is a stay-at-home mother of five who says her anger is out of control. She fears that if she doesn't get help right now, she'll fly off the deep end and do permanent damage to her children. Cameras placed in her home capture an alarming day in the life of Karen and her kids as she degrades and rages at them, and physically abuses her 10-year-old son, Brandon. Karen's husband, Jim, who says he has no idea what goes on in their home while he's at work, sees the home footage for the first time. What is his reaction? Then, hear from Brandon and his 9-year-old sister, Shayna, who describe what it's like to be a small child on the other side of a mother's intense rage. And, what did they tearfully tell the producers about how their dad disciplines them? Plus, Dr. Phil shows how Karen's 3-year-old twins are coping with their fear. Share your thoughts, join the discussion.

Find out what happened on the show.

More August 2006 Show Boards.


Some viewers have raised questions about whether the Dr. Phil show reported Jim and Karen to the authorities after the taping of this show. Other viewers have expressed surprise that Karen and Jim's children were allowed to go home with them after the show.

Please be assured that immediately following the taping of "A Mother's Rage," the Dr. Phil show did make a report to local child protection authorities. As a mental health professional, Dr. Phil is required by law to make such a report if he has concerns about the safety, welfare or well being of a child. However, Dr. Phil does not himself have the authority to remove children from their parents' home.

Remember that a lot happens after the taping of a show that TV viewers never get to see.  Dr. Phil's staff draws on a vast network of experts and mental health professionals to help Dr. Phil guests. Karen's family is just one of many to have received this assistance.

As of January, 2009, this message board will become "Read Only" and will be closed to further posting. Please join the NEW Dr. Phil Community to continue your discussions, personalize your message board experience, start a blog and meet new friends.

May 6, 2006, 1:14 pm CDT

curious

Quote From: mayzeegrl

I have not  seen the show yet as it has not aired, but from what I can see from some of the clips and information, I know it's going to be a disturbing show...  

It hits home too close for me as I had a raging mother who went out of control also and verbally, mentally and physically abused me... No one intervened and no one believed me... The abuse affected me so badly that I ended up developing an eating disorder, being in major depressions, having suicide attempts, and very low self-esteem if any... I hope this show will be helpful as far as bringing awareness to hidden abuse that happens at home... It might even surprise people that women can be child abusers too... I guess I'll have to wait and see what happens on the show, but my prayers go out to the children and I hope there will be some way to get them to safety...  

  

Why would it surprise people to know that a women could be a child abuser?  You see it every day.  Women who kill or maim their kids; women who kill their husbands in a rage; women who beat up other women; this is nothing new.   

  

I am a woman and I'm a very strong woman with strong opinions and I'll tell you sometimes you get angry at people and there's this little corner of you that says....hey pop them in the mouth and its over with (you know, the old John Wayne "Somebody outta hit you Pilgrim but I ain't, no sir, I ain't; like he** I ain't") but you DON'T.  You don't because that isn't they way intelligent people settle their differences; it isn't how we are supposed to treat those we care about, those we protect. 

 
May 6, 2006, 4:08 pm CDT

Here it is yet another father supporting his wife not kids

It is probably the father in these situations that bug me the most.  Clearly Mom has some major anger management problems and her lifestyle does not allow her an outlet for her frustration other then her kids.  Some serious counseling, a part time nanny and a gym membership would go along way to diffusing the situation.  The father in this family seems to be enabling her outrageous behavior.  With two adults in this house there should be some checks and balances that would prevent this kind of thing.  Dad has clearly failed his kids as much as mom has a serious problem.  He had to know what was going on.  He should have sent her to Outward bound for pent up moms and sheltered his kids from her rage.  He should also have gotten a vasectomy and not gotten her pregnant 5 times.  I’m sure mom reached her breaking point several children prior to 5.  It
 
May 6, 2006, 4:44 pm CDT

Please help these children Dr Phil

I am so thankful that Dr Phil is having this mother on her show. Every time I see the clips, I get so upset. I have three beautiful children and I cannot conceive of treating them in this way. I grew up in an abusive home and I know the toll it takes on a child's self-esteem. Lots of people come from abusive homes and do not abuse their children. This mother (and father for that matter) need to be put in jail! These children should be put in a safe home with people that will love them. Sadly, I know there are many, many more children in this situation. I wish there were more Dr. Phil's in this world to help children like this.
 
May 6, 2006, 6:00 pm CDT

05/08 A Mother’s Rage

Quote From: lh2000

It is probably the father in these situations that bug me the most.  Clearly Mom has some major anger management problems and her lifestyle does not allow her an outlet for her frustration other then her kids.  Some serious counseling, a part time nanny and a gym membership would go along way to diffusing the situation.  The father in this family seems to be enabling her outrageous behavior.  With two adults in this house there should be some checks and balances that would prevent this kind of thing.  Dad has clearly failed his kids as much as mom has a serious problem.  He had to know what was going on.  He should have sent her to Outward bound for pent up moms and sheltered his kids from her rage.  He should also have gotten a vasectomy and not gotten her pregnant 5 times.  I’m sure mom reached her breaking point several children prior to 5.  It
Whoah!  Now hold on there!  How do you know all five kids are his?  The dad is not responsible for her choices, she is entirely responsible for how she treats her kids.  Dad should have stepped up to the plate and been a hero and rescued his kids.  He should have protected them but he abused them further.  Each of us is responsible for the choices we make.  I am looking forward to seeing this show and getting all the facts.
 
May 6, 2006, 6:42 pm CDT

Have to feel for the kids...

I myself as a young child got the same type of treatment.  It's hard not to see yourself in those children. Especially if you were also beat by your parents. Parents from the old school didn't play. Now today looking at something like this. Its horrible. Then the probability of those children repeating this horrible cycle. Granite I had my own child and when it came to disciplining my own child. I think was easier cause I know what it felt like to be beat. I didn't want the same for my child. Looking at this woman and the hate in her eyes while she is smacking her children. Then as Dr. Phil talking to her. The tears in her eyes. How can she be so fake, acting like those tears are real. That woman makes me sick.  

 
May 6, 2006, 8:36 pm CDT

Thank you, Dr. Phil!

I looked at the trailer of Karen, and cringed.  That was my mother, an angry woman who took every opportunity to beat me within an inch of my life.  She didn't have a rod.  Hers was to have me strip naked and use a wet razor strop.  Those things smart.  There was no help in those days, and no one really understood where discipline ended and abuse began, so parents could get away with murder, and she always said she wanted to.  I always tried to be there for her.  At the end, my dad and my sisters were gone; it was just her and me.  She never changed.  When I became physically and emotionally disabled, I ended up in a homeless shelter because she didn't want me around.  But it wasn't in my character to turn my back on her.  I was with her to the end.  Her last words were put downs, and in her Will she left me a piece of jewelry.  She made it clear in writing that it was a reward for serving her at the end, and not a gift of love.  I was fortunate, though.  I have a lifelong friend who has been with me since before grade school.  For over 50 years, she has been my rock and always been there when I needed help.  Growing up, I watched her wonderful family.  The cycle of abuse would have been broken with me.  I chose to accept my friend's loving family as the roll model.  I realize now my mother's mental state was never healthy, and I am blessed to be surviving and, for the first time in my life, emotionally thriving.  But I know what it's like, and thank God for Dr. Phil and those who step in and stop the horrendous abuses.  Children deserve to have a good, happy life, and nothing gives a parent the right to beat their children.  I would beg anyone who suspects parents of being abusive to their children to get involved.  Children deserve better!  Thank you, Dr. Phil.  Boy, I wish you would have been around 40 years ago!!!!!
 
May 6, 2006, 9:13 pm CDT

why are they not in jail by now?

the fact that they appear in Dr phil show and not in jail concerns me. those innocent children were not born by their own choices;consequently, it is parent's responsibility to nourish them with their ultimate love. what the hell is going on in this country? I have been beaten by my parents probably more than them so I know what it feels like, and I don't want anybody else to feel the same way that I do about my parents and my childhood. when a child gets beaten, it changes their personality, there is nothign like, ok they experience it and they get away with it. 

 
May 6, 2006, 11:16 pm CDT

Break the Chain

 I came from a similar disfunctional family history. My Mom was a type A personality with a perfectionist-clean-freak fetish. Later we found out that she also had a Hyperactive thyroid, which was a major contributing factor. She would scream, yell, tear appart my brothers and mine's rooms and throw our stuff on the front porch. She would beat us with a belt, and a shoe horn made of a bulls horn. We all got together and threw that away behind her back. One time she gave my brother a concussion by hitting him in the head with the belt buckle. I ended up having to go to a child psychologist because I started uncontrollably shaking and throwing up. Things have gotten better as I got older. At 16 I finally stood up to my Mom when I was bigger than her, and told her she was not going to beat me anymore. I came to find out that my Mother was beaten by her father regularly with a razor strap. So I think there is definately a chain that goes generation to generation. I broke that chain in my family. Unfortunately there was no support for children in this type of crisis when I was a kid. I hope Dr. Phil can break the chain for these children.
 
May 6, 2006, 11:29 pm CDT

The put downs hurts way more than the beatings

I know because I have been there, whenever I see clips like that I always cry.  I know how those kids never feel safe at home.  It is all too familiar and all too painful to remember.   My parents ,both of them used to be extrememly physicially abusive with me.  My father particularly was verbally, and emotionally abusive.  In a short few minutes, he could used him mouth to made me felt like I worth nothing.   God how I hate him for what he had put me through.   Just why there was no Dr. Phil  there to expose my own father and mother when i was so small.  Why does God send children to those parents ?
 
May 6, 2006, 11:47 pm CDT

How can they be called parents??

Doctor Phil,  

  I am raising my niece and nephew because of my sister doing things like this to them. She chose drugs and booze over them. These poor kids were kicked, punched ,slapped, and called horrible horrible names. Cps was called MANY times.  and after hearing this and receiving a phone call from my disabled mom , I drove done and took them made her sign papers saying i have gardianship and off we went . I have had them now for almost 2 years and they are WONDERFUL and soooo cool! I am seeking and willgetcustody of them. I refuse to let a child be battered like this.  

  This mother and father should be in JAIL!!!  Cps needs to place these poor things in a foster home and mom and dad be FORCED to get help. It makes me SICK to my stomach to see that little child say please mommy don't and THEN when i see you asking them What are you most afraid of? the stick. Dad telling his lies OH i only used it once. Well this is what I have to say to him don't crap in my hand and tell me its a cookie. Thats a lie. Why would the children be SOOO afraid of it? What OTHER things are they doing BEHIND the camera to these kids. They do not deserve to have these special gifts ..SHAME ON THEM!! I can't stop crying over this..its so painful to watch and i hope and pray they seek help.   

 As far as the kids..PLEASE i beg you PLEASE get them out of there. It only takes one good thud to kill someone. I can see that happening if something is not done soon  

 
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