Topic : Pregnancy Loss

I understand exactly what you are going through. I just lost a baby on the 4th of April, this year. This was my fourth miscarriage, only this time it was totally different. With all of the others I did not have an ultrasound or even saw the baby. I was only about a month along. With this one, I had already had 2 ultrasounds. I was 2 1/2 months along. I saw him/her when she/he was 1 month old, then I saw him/her 2 weeks later, because I thought I was miscarrying. I heard the baby's heart beat and everything! It was so exciting. Then the 3rd time my husband was actually going to get to see the baby, and hear the baby's heart beat! He was so excited and anxious! Could not wait to hear him/her. The doctor checked for 30 minutes and then told me that he couldn't find a heartbeat! The baby had passed away 2 days before.  I was devastated. We had tried for almost 2 years to get pregnant in the first place, then it is ripped away. I could not understand why I could not carry a child. I only had to wait one day to get the baby removed, but it was still long enough. I really wish that the baby was big enough to bury. I know that sounds horrible, but at least I might have some closure. I honestly don't know where to go from here, or how to cope with this. I wish that I knew what to do next. I know that many people have this story. I am glad that I found this on the Dr. Phil website, maybe we can all help eachother back to healing. Thank you all for your stories.

Jacquie

for all of us who have lost a child--you gave birth to a beautiful baby!!! whether anyone believes you or not, a child was inside of you, you had contractions and your baby passed through your birth canal (all characteristics of birth).

i miscarried my daughter at 12 weeks (heartbeat told us it was a girl). i did not get to bury my daughter but i have planted a special garden for her.  i am there for everyone who has been through this. i know your pain and i understand that the best thing you can do is mourn.

please email me if anyone wants a shoulder to cry on or a friend to just listen.

I am also 21 years old. My husband and I have been married for 4 years, and I have had 5 failed pregnacies, and one sucessful.  My daughter is now 1 year old. Since her birth I have had 3 miscarriages.  I understand the feeling of not wanting to try anymore.  But the pain I feel every time I lose a baby is nothing compared to the pain I feel thinking I may not have another as beautiful and amazing as Annabelle.  So I have no choice but to try agian.  My doctors have said they want to run tests after my miscarriage ( I am currently going through one) to try to figure out what the cause may be.  Have your doctors mentioned anything like that?  Maybe you should ask them.  I have heard so much about things you can do to prevent miscarriages, some so easy as taking a baby asprin every day when you are trying to conceive throughout the first three months of pregnacy, but only your doctors can determine if it is something that can be fixed with that or hormones or whatever.  I was told that if you have two or more miscarriages in a row, there may be something linking them and you should be tested.  That does not mean that you can not have a child.  So I guess the real question is can you be okay with not trying anymore? And if you want a child, but don't feel like you can deal with the emotional devestation that comes with losing a baby, maybe you shold look into adoption.  But don't lose all hope, you may very well be able to carry a baby to term. Look at your options.

hi girls, have been reading some of your stories - iam sorry for all of your losses but none more so then my own! We lost our first child at birth i was 39 wks pregnant and had a placental abruption, i had just been to the hospital that morning for a check-up and everything was fine except for some elevated blood pressure. That night around midnight i had an abruption and my son was born still at 3:17am, the doctors say we only missed out by a few minutes, we were so close but so far and didn't even know it. I didn't think this sort of thing happened these days apparently i had a 1% chance of it happening at all! How am i dealing with it you may ask? Each day as it comes, it will be 1 yr next month since we lost our son, xmas gone was hard, mothers day was even harder, and fathers day will be too, for my husband. We also have a nephew who was born 1 month before we had our son, they would have been so close, i think about him everyday we have heaps of photos and memories that we have created for him, i couldn't possibly act like he never existed that would be wrong, talking about it with my husband and our friends and family has definately helped us to deal with it. Some family members still find it hard to talk about and deal with, but we don't, know i'm 33 wks pregnant with our second baby, a little girl, everything is going fine, i think having another baby helps to deal with the pain but it will never replace what we went thru, i got pregnant 3 mths after having my son,we just wanted to have another baby so badly, can't wait till she's here,all i can say is never forget your babies, they are still apart of your family and make sure your family don't forget them either,even if it hurts. Ofcourse i think about how my son would look know, what he would be like, it changes you forever, we had to make some really hard decision, do we let them do an autopsy or not, do we bury or cremate him, how do you have a service for someone that never had a chance to live a single day. Try and deal with it the best you can, and find out as much as you can about why it happened before you look at getting pregnant again, but do get pregnant again! Most importantly you need to face the loss and deal with it otherwise it will eat you alive!!!! Good luck to all of you. Iam from australia so i will check the site from time to time to chat and express my feelings.

IN LOVING MEMORY OF OUR SON BROCK-BORN SLEEPING INTO THE ARMS OF ANGELS-14SEPT 2006-WE WILL MISS YOU FOREVER!!!!!!