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Topic : Should We Get Pregnant?

Number of Replies: 184
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Created on : Thursday, June 30, 2005, 12:56:08 pm
Author : dataimport
It is a question most marriages face - when is it right to add a family member? Share your answers with us!

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December 9, 2008, 3:03 pm CST

Children or no children???

Hi everyone.  I wasn't sure which messageboard to put this on, but this one seemed like the most relevant…I'm 26 years old and my life has been turned upside down in less than a week.  A short time ago I had a growth removed from my cervix.  After the operation, I was really confident it was all over and everything would return back to normal.  This wasn't the case.  At my check up with the gynocologist it was revealed that the growth was 1 level off being cancer which is very uncommon for my age.  He then went on to tell me that I could have a family but after that I need to have a hysterectomy.  However, because there is a huge risk the growth will come back, he recommends I have the hysterectomy sooner rather than later. 

  

I've been with my boyfriend for nearly 4 years, and although marriage and children were certainly going to happen, we weren't planning on it for a few years yet.  I know I want to have a family one day, but mentally and financially I'm definitely not ready at the present (same goes with my boyfriend).  I also don't want my boyfriend thinking I'm pressuring him into anything.

  

I'm very confused and depressed as I've had a few people tell me (including my mum) to not worry about having children, to look after my health and have the hysterectomy now.  My head also tells me this, but my heart wants a family.  I know there are options like adoption etc but I'd really love my own kids. 

  

I'm not sure how many other girls my age have been in the situation (I personally don't know anyone) so just need some "outsiders" opinions on what I should do. 

  

Thanks!!

 
March 30, 2009, 1:01 am CDT

teen prgnancy

Im 17 years old and have been with my boyfriend for two years we plan on getting married right out of high school and all that fun stuff. But the last year or so i have been trying to get pregnant he doesnt really want to yet but he does want children i am so anxious to get pregnant and i dont know if i can wait another couple years. I know i will be a good mother at any age but i dont know if now is the right time or not. Please help
 
March 30, 2009, 1:04 am CDT

Should We Get Pregnant?

Quote From: carmie1982

Hi everyone.  I wasn't sure which messageboard to put this on, but this one seemed like the most relevantI'm 26 years old and my life has been turned upside down in less than a week.  A short time ago I had a growth removed from my cervix.  After the operation, I was really confident it was all over and everything would return back to normal.  This wasn't the case.  At my check up with the gynocologist it was revealed that the growth was 1 level off being cancer which is very uncommon for my age.  He then went on to tell me that I could have a family but after that I need to have a hysterectomy.  However, because there is a huge risk the growth will come back, he recommends I have the hysterectomy sooner rather than later. 

  

I've been with my boyfriend for nearly 4 years, and although marriage and children were certainly going to happen, we weren't planning on it for a few years yet.  I know I want to have a family one day, but mentally and financially I'm definitely not ready at the present (same goes with my boyfriend).  I also don't want my boyfriend thinking I'm pressuring him into anything.

  

I'm very confused and depressed as I've had a few people tell me (including my mum) to not worry about having children, to look after my health and have the hysterectomy now.  My head also tells me this, but my heart wants a family.  I know there are options like adoption etc but I'd really love my own kids. 

  

I'm not sure how many other girls my age have been in the situation (I personally don't know anyone) so just need some "outsiders" opinions on what I should do. 

  

Thanks!!

i personally think you should have children you are at a perfect age and you seem semi ready, But if you dont have them you may regret it later on in life.
 
June 19, 2009, 7:29 am CDT

Did he really want children?

At first my apology for my bad english, I don't use the English lanquage daily or weekly.

I met my husband about 4 years ago. First we were in love and before it became really serious I told him about my whishes for the future. I told him that I wanted a child and that if he didnot want a child we could better end the relationship right away. He told me that he wanted a child so I gave myself over in my love for him. In the years we talked about the subject of getting a child and we made some goals. I was having therapy that had to end, and then I had to have work in the area where we were going to live, and then there was the House that I was owning that should be sold and the dept that was left from the sale had to be payd of.

So now the dept is payd of and I still have 2 months of birth control, so I suggested to finish the birth control pil and then we would start trying to get a baby.

At that moment he was starting to tell me he was doupting about it, not only that, from his words I was sure he wasnot doupting but he was sure that he didnot want it. Becouse afther each answer I had for his problems he got a new problem, at the end he said he wondered if I could ever become a good mom because my troubled Youth.....

I had discussed the final problem he gave before with my therapists and she didnot see a problem for me to become a good mom, I have worked on my troubled youth and I donot have any pain and any bad outcome from that anymore. The only thing I know is that I want a baby and later on a bigger kid to give my maternal love to.

FInaly we agreed to wait an other year....even though he sees himself as to old for a father he wants to wait  at least one year. I really don't want to wait I have waited enough and I'm affraid that afther that year he sais that he really doesnot want it.

 
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