Topic : 05/17 Brandon Behind Bars

We too, had our son sign a release form. So we knew where treatment was going. The only thing is that we couldn't get him in inpatient because the "Professionals", said they could do it outpatient. Even pleading and begging didn't help, since our son was "such a nice young man". When I told them after he was involuntarilly commited that if they let him go after just 5 days he would be dead within a year. I was told once again by the "Professionals" that I didn't know that for sure. Well, guess what? He was dead 4 months later. Some of the "Professionals" do not listen to the parent. Having raised my son for 21 years, I could see his decline and ultimately his demise in the wings.Yet I was never taken into account what I saw coming. I never gave up hope on my son, but trying to get the "system" to work just didn't happen. I wish you all the best for you and your daughter, maybe where you are at, professionals take account of what the parent has to say. God Bless.

Dr. Phil I know Brandon can do this.  I have been dating the same guy for 3 years and he has been clean for a year and a half now.  If he can do it anyone can do it.  Things got so bad for him, he also gave up on trying to hide using from me and would yell at me and make me take him to get more drugs.  I have been in so many bad situations myself that he had put me in but I prayed and prayed and believed in the good in him and after almost 2 years of him in and out of jail using and selling drugs I realized I cant change him he has to want to change himself.  Me and his family prayed and hoped for a solution.  He finally when he hit rock bottom (for real that time) said he wanted to change he was sick of himself.  He was enrolled in the Malachi House in Greensboro NC God saved his life.  He really got into church and that was and is the best thing that could have happened.  I want to give Brandon hope and I want him to really think about a treatment program and maybe even a Christian one.  My boyfriends program lasted a year and I think it was well worth it.  I really think it is very hard to change someones ways in just 30 or 90 days.  I want to tell his parents that it is worth the wait.  I am so happy now and am so thankful for the program and so thankful for God for giving him another chance.  I also want to tell them to pray and God will answer their prayers. Brandon keep your head up, you can do it!

Ricntata, if you're reading this, I just want you to know how sorry I am that you have a friend who is in jail right now. Whatever you do, don't give up on him! You sound like a real, sweet, intelligent friend towards him. And don't worry about the others that are judging & condemning him. They have no idea what it's like to be in his or his family's shoes. Stay strong, & always stick by him, as he'll be needing people like you very often. If you need someone to talk to, my E-mail address is in my profile. My prayers goes out to you, Brandon, & his family. God bless!

dr phil i am sitting here reading all this feed back, boy am i lucky to have a loving famely,  i cant beleive all the people that think brandons familey needs to just throw him away like a broken peice of furniture, my  god were talkin about another humanbeing here people,yes he has a problem but honestly he was given a choice of rehab or jail he chose jail that took alot of courage to do, he knew he had to be some place whear he couldnt get his hands on any drugs, yes he has put his familey through pure hell, but honestly when your a drug addic you dont know ur hurting any one but your self,and for all you people out thear that say addiction is not a desease you are sooo wrong it has been proven, i know i am a recovering addic, never tried herion but i did love crack cocainand i can tell you this 1 is toomany and 10,000 are no0t enough, so people lighten up on brandon he knows he made a mistake, and now he is paying for it, its sooo hard to stay off drugs when thear on every street corner in america, want to know who i blame, not brandon, but our goverment, try to find a cuban cigar in this country, i challenge every one to do this so people lets put the blame whear it truley belongs,   remove the drugs and this world will be a better and safer place for every one,and yeah you guessed it im pissed at all the people that think brandon is a lost cause i applawd  his loving familey, his mother needs to learn how not to enable him but she dosent need to give up on him and people when i was in rehab my roommate was smoking crack in the restroom so see brandon made the better choice in choosing jail

The mother is very child-like and ineffectual - the problem looks like it belongs much more with a childish parent - who expresses herself as a litlte girl - with no power except in her affections to her children.  I'd love to see the mother getting some further therapy to grow her up about 20 years or so.  She could be a powerful woman who could deal with life - this is just one of the many issues that can come along. As some one with a young adult who also spends volunteer time in the jail, I see the problems usually relate to being inauthentic - not taking any responsibility for one's own life. I think the mother'staking responsibility for her own life would be a great benefit to her. 

I know what it is like to have a son in jail but you know where he is and that counts for a lot. I wish you the best, it is a long road, a road that has yet to end for us also. I cry many nights also and my marriage is also suffering. Know you are in my prayers and thoughts.

 I think I got a clue after watching his mother I couldn't believe my eyes! She greets him in jail with a sympathetic smile ????. He needs his a** jacked over his shoulders! I don't see any hope for that guy at all until he's no longer under his Mommy's thumb! The Dad just plain checked out. NNNNTTHHH!!! I'm biting my tongue before i really get started.

I understand Brandon because I have seen it happen with my husband.  I only wish I had seen Brandon's story in 2003 before my husband committed suicide.  There were many things I did not understand even though I was attending Alanon seeking help.  I did not understand that my husband, an addict, would relapse after he had been to the hospital for detox and then gone through rehab.  I wish through all the classes I attended, I would have understood that many addicts relapse over and over.  I gave up on him and he gave up on himself.  Then he couldn't find his way out of the mess he had made of his life.  I am hoping Brandon can save himslf from the drugs.  Good luck and best wishes for a long and drug free life.

WHY IS IT I THINK  

  

he's getting DRUGS inside the jail  

and, perhaps that's why he doesn't mind the 6 months ??? 

  

do they urine test people in jail ??? 

  

if NOT they should 

  

just my thoughts...I AM AN INTIATIVE and, i sensed he's still taking drugs 

  I'm sorry,but this kid is still B.Sing.The mom should be glad he is in jail,at least she will know where he is at night!She needs to let go immediately.Listen to what she hears any one can recite the 12 steps but not everyone can walk them......I'm not unsympathetic my daughter has struggled with this problem since she was 13 (now 36).She knows what to do.She is saturated with AA.My husband is sober 25 yrs.I went to Al-Anon for 15 yrs,I still struggle but if she doesn't let him go,she will kill him with love,not tuff love.She needs to find a local support group,HOW can she help others when she can't even help herself. 

  

                                                                          Sallie A,Westfelt