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Topic : The Funny Things They Say and Do

Number of Replies: 142
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Created on : Thursday, June 30, 2005, 12:58:56 pm
Author : dataimport
Did your child do or say something hilarious today? Chronicle it here!

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October 18, 2005, 8:48 pm CDT

The Funny Things They Say and Do

My TWO year old woes LOL I wanted to laugh so bad last night when my two year old was being a bit bossy but I held it in and dealt with it. She was ready to get out of the tub so of course I helped her out and as I was drying her off, she wanted the towell off of her, I told her that she needed dried off, she looked at me, pointed her finger at me, and said, "you be nice", I looked at her and said, "you be nice, you are gonna get dried off," as I was drying her off, she attempted to take the towell off of her, pointed her finger at me and repeated her self, I looked at her and said, "who is the mommy?", she looked at me and said, "I am the mommy,"pointed to me and said,"now, be nice." thati s when I wanted to laugh but I lokked at her very seriously and said, "I am the mommy and if you don't stop you are going night night," she looked at me and said, "ok, mommy, I be nice to you, no night night," she gave me hugs on her own and everything was fine and dandy. O the wonderful age of two. she is actually a very well mannered little girl but she certainly is bossy LOL
 
October 25, 2005, 9:31 am CDT

Toddler Boys

 There are two stories here:
1st was my cousin.  When he was three, my aunt had a baby girl.  One day, she was changing her diaper and Day realized that she didn't have a penis.  He started FREAKING out!  His parents finally got him calmed down enough to ask what was wrong and he says "she doesn't have a thingie!  I have one, Dad has one, Mom has one!"  They were trying so hard not to laugh and to explain the difference to him.

2nd was my 2 year old.  He and his 3 y.o. friend were playing in my bathroom and I told them they didn't belong in there and to come out.  She came out, but locked the door and closed it behind him.  My son couldn't get out and I couldn't get in.  By the time I found a screwdriver and REMOVED the doorknob, he had gotten into a brand new tube of DARK RED lipstick and smeared the entire tube all over his face, the toilet, all of my other make-up, his clothes, the wall and the tub.  I immediately took off his clothes and put him in a bathtub full of Dawn.  After 30 minutes of scrubbing and him screaming and struggling, I'd managed to get his face to a pink color, but he was stained for 3 days and his beautiful blonde hair was pink!  BTW, if anybody ever needs to know how to remove lipstick from clothing...
  1. Rub in vegetable or mineral oil onto the affected areas and allow it to soak for 15 minutes.
  2. Blot excess oils with an absorbent paper towel or terry cloth rags.
  3. Then sponge in a solution of 50% ammonia with water (unless the fabric is silk or wool).
  4. Rinse thoroughly with cool water and wring out.
  5. Sponge remaining affected areas liberally with isopropyl rubbing alcohol.
  6. Apply laundry pre treat and launder washables in hot water.
  7. HOWEVER, a little lipstick contains a lot of dye in even a small particle. A VALUABLE PIECE OF ADVICE is to take your laundry to a professional with a stain removal expert at your local Laundromat or dry cleaners.

 
October 26, 2005, 6:23 am CDT

The doctors appointment

I took my 3 kids to get a flu shot at the Doctors office. I have a 4 y/o, 5y/o and a 16 y/o. Everytime we go to see the Doctor, my 4 y/o acts like she is sick and has a "fake" cough and all the nurses baby her and give her attention. She (4 y/o) knows this so she does it purposely. My 5 y/o got on the table to get his flu shot. All of a sudden the 4 y/o says: "I'm not sick anymore, I am better".When the nurse told the 4 y/o it was her turn, she took off running and headed for the door screaming : "I WILL GET ONE TOMMORROW, I AM BETTER". We got her and had to wrestle with her to get her jacket off and she hung onto it tight. We fianlly got her jacket off and I had to sit with her on the table to hold her still while she is still screaming :"I HATE SHOTS, I DONT WANT ONE, I WILL GET IT TOMMORROW, I AM BETTER"! The nurse told her she was going to spray something on her arm so she wont feel the shot. Then she told her " lets count to 3 together and it will all be over". My daughter said "O.K." So the nurse said one, my daughter said one (in a very scared voice) then the nurse gave her her shot and said OK we are all done. My daughter looked at me and then at the nurse and screamed: " BUT I DIDNT GET TO COUNT TO THREE!!!"  It was so funny. My daughters face had to look of pure horror on it when she realized she had to get a shot, but what made it even funnier was when she got mad because she didnt get to count to 3.
 
October 30, 2005, 12:08 am CDT

Funny kids

I asked my 3 year old son to lay on the couch with me for a few minutes before he went to bed. He crawled up there with me and laid his head on my chest. He asked "What's that?" I explained to him that it was my heart beating, but I also reminded him that that's where Jesus is too. He said, "But I can't see Him", I told him that he couldn't see Him but as long as he believed in Him and counted on Him that He would always be right there. Well, he was satisfied and laid his little head back down on my chest. I was just savoring the moment when he jumped up off of the couch and yelled, "MOMMY, HE WANTS OUT!!!!". 

I just about fell off the couch from laughing so hard!!! 

 
October 30, 2005, 6:06 pm CST

The Funny Things They Say and Do

as my four year old was getting dressed this evening, she told me that she wished that cowboys was called horseboys becasue they ride horses, not cows.
 
October 31, 2005, 11:03 am CST

Just when...

Just when I am concerned about living in the country and not being close to neighbors and other kids, my kids blow my mind. We have had a busy weekend, with birthday parties, halloween parties and a parade scheduled. When we were getting ready to go to ther parade, my 4 yr old said- "Mommy, I want to swing on the swings out back." I told her that we had to leave to go be in the parade, and didn't she want to do that- she answered, "Well, I suppose so, if you want, but I would rather swing on the swings." We stayed home.... the princess and the boo-bah or blueberry or  blue Steven Segal (?)......whew
 
November 2, 2005, 8:21 am CST

pumpkin and scarecrow

My almost two year old daughter has bright red hair so my husband has recently taken up calling her his pumpkin. Everytime she laughs and says my daddy called me pumpkin. The other day my husband called her his pumpkin and my three year old son chimed in and said Hannahs your pumpkin but I'm your scarecrow ! They can be sooo creative.
 
November 7, 2005, 7:19 pm CST

The dump truck

Story one:
Sunday, while in mass, my 2 1/2 year old son notices the little boy in front of us has some Hot Wheels. Well my son just loves all types of cars, so he wants to play too. The boys Grandmother gives my son one car, so my husband tells our son he can play withthe little boy, but he also has to share his airplane. While playing my son notices one of the Hot Wheels is a dump truck. (I bought my son a dump truck as a reward for going #2 in the potty, which has not yet happened, but I leave the dump truck where he can see it for encouragement.) Anyway, my son grabs the dump truck and sits on the chair besit the Grandmother and in an excited voice says loudyly enough for the people around us to hear. "Devin gets new dump truck when Devin goes on the potty". He then puts his hands up to his mouth, leans forward and laughs hysterically at himself. My husband and I looked at each other and cracked up. What else can you do. Now everyone in the church nursery knows we are in potty training mode. LOL!

Story two:
My son (2 1/2) noticed I have a small raised mole on my side. He says mommy what is that. I tell him it is a mole. He lifts up my shirt to see my mole and says "Mommy's mole?" I say, "Yes, that is mommys mole". A few days later I was changing him and as I take of his jammies, he points to his nipples and says, "Devin's moles." I said, "no, they are nipples". Now if I ask him if they are his moles he says "no, they are hipples".

He is always saying something that keeps us laughing.
 
November 9, 2005, 3:53 pm CST

My 3 year old

While looking through a toy catalog, my 3 year old found a fire truck that he really liked.  He came to me extremely excited and insisted I come and see!  He pointed to the picture and said to me "mommy, I'm gonna have to cry for that one".  hmmm, mommy better nip that one in the bud :-)
 
December 2, 2005, 8:45 pm CST

The differnces

Quote From: aderyn3

When I had my baby, my oldest (about 3 1/2 at the time) was watching me change his diaper for the first time, and she (having only a baby sister before him) said "Mommy, why does he have a finger coming out of his butt?"  Needless to say, that went in both of their baby books!!  Out of the mouths of babes.........(now almost 5, 2, and 1). 

My son had a surprising reaction also.  While changing my 3 month old son (now 3 1/2) my mom was changing my 3 month niece.  The babies were head to head on her bed.  My oldest, then 6 y.o. (step) son looked back and forth between the two.  Got this real worried look on his face, leaned real close to me, and whispered "Mama Jen, Mama Jen!  SHE'S MISSING SOMETHING!!!"  While trying not to laugh I explained the difference between boys and girls.  He happily went off to play with his other male cousins while I sat on the floor and laughed so hard I cried.  He's nine now and thinks it's hysterical when I tell him this story. 

 
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