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Topic : 05/29 Parenting Dilemmas

Number of Replies: 283
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Created on : Thursday, May 25, 2006, 09:42:01 am
Author : DrPhilBoard1
Are you a parent whose household is spinning out of control? Cindi says her daughter, Kristina, used to be a fresh-faced all-American beauty, but now, with seven tattoos, she looks like a freak! Cindi says that if her daughter gets inked one more time, she’ll cut her off. Then, Nancy was heartbroken when she learned her 17-year-old daughter had been keeping a devastating secret. See this teen's message about how opening up saved her life. And, when Nancy Davis was diagnosed with multiple sclerosis 14 years ago, the doctor said her life was over. She knew she had to get better for her three young sons. See her heartwarming message for anyone dealing with an illness. Then, a mom struggles with 7-year-old triplets competing to be the best! Talk about the show here.

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May 28, 2006, 9:46 am CDT

05/29 Parenting Dilemmas

Quote From: ladybug11

well  tattoos    are   ok but  it harms your skin.  its a sin to mark on your body. jesus did not mean for us to  mess up our bodys!!!!   i  think  tattoos  make a person ugly.  tattoos are not sexy.  it makes a man or woman  ugly and nasty looking.  you may be a great person on the inside, but on the outside it makes you look  nasty.....  periceings   are nasty too.  they make people look like  they do drugs!!!     i just think  its all  nasty looking and i  am not judgeing for who you are!  i am just saying  it makes people ugly and nasty looking thats all!!
maybe you should point out Jesus's exact words in the Bible stating "don't tattoo yourself" because I can't find them.  Secondly... Jesus said not to judge........ and you are throwing stones.......  So I guess you are more in the wrong or "SIN" than I am for having tattoos.  
 
May 28, 2006, 9:50 am CDT

05/29 Parenting Dilemmas

Quote From: pruttemis

I'll start out by saying-I'm danish,and have been brouhgt up,not judging other people,just get along with them....I talk to anyone-I know that it sometimes could lead to misunderstandings,but if it goes, well,I'm happy....I once wanted a tatoo,but now,at age 28,I do not dare doing it.I can do without,because when I get older,it might be something I regret,and that is the last thing I wanna do-regret!-Learned that it's the last thing to do....don't regret things you have done,rather regret things you never did!!!!Hope you are all well-talk to you soon....Henriette from Denmark! 

You know one of my favorite psychobilly bands is from Denmark!!!!  Horrorpops... good band and they are covered in tattoos...... Lars Frederiksen is part Danish and he is covered in tattoos too!!!
 
May 28, 2006, 9:52 am CDT

05/29 Parenting Dilemmas

Quote From: mari28

As a mother who has gone through this same dilema with my now 21 year old, I can sympathize. Speaking from experience and what friends & family members kept telling me, "They do it just to get a reaction and attention"  My son was into the "Goth" phase when he was 13 and talk about depressing  

He would wear black clothes all the time; painted his finger nails black & even dyed his already black hair darker  even though I didn't think that was possible.  His room was filled with Marilyn Manson posters.  

   

We would have some real doozy of arguments over his appearance.  There were times when I even dreaded going out with him in public.     

   

I finally got to the point where I kept my comments to myself and within a year, he changed gradually.  Gone are the black clothes, finger nails & Marilyn Manson posters.  He does have a lip ring which he occasionally removes.   

   

So hang in there, believe it or not she'll come around.   

   

Signed   

   

NO LONGER A GOTH KID'S MOM    

Thats not really true in some means.  I'm 26 yrs old and been into the punk thing since I was 13yrs old.  I don't plan on changing either.  And its not about a reaction those that do it for that are fake to begin with.  I do it because its what I love, I really enjoy it!!!!  And my mom never once acted ashamed of me nor would she have wanted to change me. 
 
May 28, 2006, 9:56 am CDT

05/29 Parenting Dilemmas

Quote From: skgonzales

i can understand the frustration but do not cut her off she is still a child of God just like we are childeren of our God.  And our God forgives us personal i beleive if God whated us born with tatoo's on our body we would be born with them.  That is what i told me kids if they wanted any it will be after they are 18 and there decission not mine.  But i had four out of four that got tatoo's one realy bad i did not want to be seen with him and do not tell me it does not change a persons emtions, and the family and the ones around them because it does.  But for the mother u can not change what she had done and pls do not cut her off God forgives us and we have done a lot wrong.  For the daughter i feel that u did this to get your  moms attention for some reason my kids did.  But i cuted my one daughter off because this is what my late husband whated and two years later she commited sucide.  I never had a change to tell her i love her and forgive her.
This bothers me......... forgive her??? forgive her for what?? Having tattoos???  She did nothing wrong!!!!  Tattoos aren't something wrong!!!!!  Maybe you should hope she forgave you!!!!!! You could only hope to be so lucky!
 
May 28, 2006, 1:51 pm CDT

sorry to say but

Quote From: luckynum13

Actually tattoos are very sexy....... I'm more attracted to men with tattoos than I am to ones without them.  They aren't ugly.  But I guess beauty is in the eye of the beholder.  
tattoos make man and woman look  ugly and nasty!  not sexy  at all!!!
 
May 28, 2006, 1:53 pm CDT

ok

Quote From: elffie

You don't have to be scared.  

  

 If God didn't want people to tattoo themselves, then why did he supposedly make the "ink".  People have been tattooing themselves since the dawn of man.  Priestesses marked themselves as a symbol to their "Great One".  (I didn't say the actually name, I'm not trying to offend anyone here.) 

  

My point, this art of tattooing goes back a long way.  It's not something that just started in our lifetime. 

  

  

god did not make ink, man did and   god does not make something to mess our bodys up
 
May 28, 2006, 2:00 pm CDT

hey!!!!!!

if anyone on here would like to chat about what i say on here!  then e-mail me!!  rcrdngcountry@earthlink.net
 
May 28, 2006, 3:35 pm CDT

05/29 Parenting Dilemmas

Quote From: ladybug11

god did not make ink, man did and   god does not make something to mess our bodys up
My point was that the art of tattooing has been around for thousands of years, it's not new.  Just like peircings.  You sound very closed minded.
 
May 28, 2006, 5:49 pm CDT

Wanting help:

Quote From: ladybug11

god did not make ink, man did and   god does not make something to mess our bodys up

        

         Let's not worry about the tattoo this child has a problem if she's doing all these different things  she's crying out for help in the only way  that she knows how. 

                                                                                                                              deruise 

 
May 28, 2006, 7:28 pm CDT

ANGRY with Dr. Phil

I'll be honest, I'm a pretty big fan of Dr. Phil, normally, but this tattoo story has gotten me on edge & he really ought to be ashamed of himself.  

  

Let's go down the arguments that I've heard over the years (yes, I have multiple tattoos too, *shock*):  

  

1. She'll never get a job.  False.  I've had really good jobs before & after I got tattooed & none of them cared.  Even at a bank, when my tattoos were visible, it was perfectly fine.  The woman in this story doesn't have any tattoos on her face, neck or hands, so she would easily be able to cover the ones she has, if necessary.  Also, as the world continues to progress, more & more people are accepting of tattoos & it is now more "mainstream" & not frowned upon nearly as much as in the past.  Chances are, a potential boss won't look down on tattoos like they did 20 years ago.  

  

2. She'll regret them.  So?  If she does, that's her business.  Apparently, her mother has never regretted any decision she's ever made, or had somebody tell her not to do something because she might regret it later.  How dare she assume that she knows what is good for her adult daughter better than the daughter knows herself?  

Personally, I don't regret a single one of my tattoos.  Even the ones I got on a whim are deep & meaningful for me.  I look at them & I can remember how I felt, what caused me to get the tattoo, where I was & who I was with.  They are representations of great memories & milestones in my life.  

  

3. Her skin will look HORRIBLE.  BTW, Dr. Phil, you need to fire your "age enhancement" team, because they suck!  What's with the bad dye job on the 80 year old picture?  Why assume that she'll have bad & wrinkled skin everywhere?  Most people with tattoos actually TAKE CARE of their skin & treat their tattoos like gold, keeping them soft & supple.  We take pride in our skin & in our art & we want it to last forever.  So what if it fades?  So does everything else.    

  

4. She'll be marked as a criminal/outcast of society.  Hmm, are we still living in 1950?  No, we're in the 21st century.  Yes, people still judge books by their cover, but that's not the book's fault.  Dr. Phil, you preach "stay true to yourself."  Does that mean that a person's "trueness" is only as good as society sees?  That a person cannot be true to themselves if they broach society's narrow-minded views?  

  

Again, Dr. Phil, you should be ashamed of yourself for putting this on the air.  You are contributing to the most shameful values of society today, judging a person before you know them.  This woman is over 18 & has every right to do what she wants to her own body.  If she can be a productive member of the world & happens to have beautiful artwork on her body, MORE POWER TO HER.  We're not asking you to get a tattoo, Dr. Phil, so why don't you stop telling other people what to do with their own lives?  

  

I'm planning on getting another tattoo on my upcoming birthday, in June.  This tattoo started off as a long, thoughtful process that took time & energy.  I went to my artist (that has done my last 2 tattoos), I talked to him & we decided on what would look best for my idea & my body.  I can't wait to get my artwork done & I will NEVER be ashamed of it.  On the other hand, I am ashamed of the people that judge me simply because I express myself, my personality & my soul visibly on my skin. 

 
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