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Topic : 05/29 Parenting Dilemmas

Number of Replies: 283
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Created on : Thursday, May 25, 2006, 09:42:01 am
Author : DrPhilBoard1
Are you a parent whose household is spinning out of control? Cindi says her daughter, Kristina, used to be a fresh-faced all-American beauty, but now, with seven tattoos, she looks like a freak! Cindi says that if her daughter gets inked one more time, she’ll cut her off. Then, Nancy was heartbroken when she learned her 17-year-old daughter had been keeping a devastating secret. See this teen's message about how opening up saved her life. And, when Nancy Davis was diagnosed with multiple sclerosis 14 years ago, the doctor said her life was over. She knew she had to get better for her three young sons. See her heartwarming message for anyone dealing with an illness. Then, a mom struggles with 7-year-old triplets competing to be the best! Talk about the show here.

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May 29, 2006, 10:54 am PDT

body of canvas

Sounds like the daughter and tats are either crying out for attention or expressing herself.  But tats are permanent and she might regret it later but she might not.  The body can make a beautiful canvas if you have a the right artist.  I think the mom should listen to her daughter's needs and may be they could come up with a compromise.  Like dress nice when out for a family supper and the rest of the time dress the way she likes.
 
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May 29, 2006, 12:07 pm PDT

NANCY DAVIS MAKES ME WANT TO SCREAM!!!!!

I appreciate Nancy Davis, her devotion to MS and all the money she has helped raise but  am so darn tired of her representing MS as something you can just dominate with a postivie attitude. Has she met Annette Funicello? Did she know Richard Pryor? There are other examples of people with MS and she has been one of the fortunate ones.  

   

Every time my family sees her on these talk shows they ask me if I am sure I can't walk straight if I ONLY tried. They wonder if I am just sleeping cause I'm lazy. Surely I could think more clearly if i was more like Nancy!!!!  

   

I am sorry, i don't like having MS and I do everything in my power to maintain a positive attitude and keep my life as normal as possible but it's people like her that create problems for people like me.  

 
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May 29, 2006, 12:23 pm PDT

There's nothing wrong with tattoos...

Especially if they are Well-thought out and meaningful to the person they are on. I'm 22 and I have 12 tattoos. Each one of those 12 means something significant to me, and I have 2 major tattoo pieces planned as tribute to my father who passed away. To me tattoos are not only a form of self-expression and art, but also a way to help remind me of how strong I am.

Society looks at us tattooed people as trash. It's just one more stereotype. It's prejudice, just like hating someone for the color of their skin. It's something no one quite gets. My generation is increasingly more and more tattooed. When we're 60, it will be the norm to us to be heavily or at least moderately tattooed. I think it's time people accept the fact we're inked. We're not bad people. We're just like you. I have the same values, morals, ect. I work hard in college, and I work hard at my job.

The history of tattooing goes back to prehistoric times. Doesn't anyone else find it ironic that today's society still doesn't accept it?

xoxo-Sid-

 
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May 29, 2006, 12:32 pm PDT

no regrets, you can't see them but they're there.

I'm 29 year old mom, had a beautiful wedding in a beautiful dress. Looked just like a princess. Since the age of 18 I have been getting tattoos. I got my husbands first tattoo last Christmas. We bought each other tattoos for our wedding gifts to each other. My mom does NOT like them, so when I go over there, I cover them. Out of respect. I love the negative reaction I get, never from anyone in my generation, usually from the older generation. My son loves them, my inlaws except me for who I am. I am responsible, I work full time, I take care of my family. So when I come across judgemental people, I just smile and think to myself...."I will never be like that". And I know I won't. I will never teach my child it's ok to judge a person for being different. Cause where do you draw a line at discrimination. Which is what it is. Judging someone for being different then everyone else.  I just told my mom, I'll stop dressing the way I do, I'll cover up, grow my hair long and typical, then I'll do drugs, steal, lie, and be a judgemental snot.....but I'll look the part.  

I have no regrets up until this point. The only thing I will ever regret is not experiencing things in life.   

Never regret what you have done, only regret what you haven't.   

 
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May 29, 2006, 12:44 pm PDT

tattoos

I live in a small back woods town, and have been getting tattoos since I turned 18, my parents were dissapointed at first, but as time went on they got use to them, I am up to 13 now, a full sleeve in the working. My mother got one done with me for her 50th birthday, plus she got her nose ond tongue pierced and plans to get her belly button done, she always said she would try her best to take interest in everything her kids did. Now I am presently having a full sleeve done, and have been doing tattoos myself for two years. I also work in a respectful job, where they don't care what I look like, my union backs my freedom of choice. I am a mother of a beautiful 5 year old girl, and she likes that mommy looks like a colouring book, lol. My husband is very conservative, it took me five years to convince him to get his third tattoo. For the girl from the show your ink looked great and don't ever let anyone put you down for it, I was always told by my original tattoo artist, god rest his soul that there are two kinds of people in this world, those with tattoos and those without, the difference is that those with them don't care if you have ink or not. I always told my mom, she knew where I was and what I was doing, and still as an adult today she always knows, and she can be confident I wasn't doing drugs, or excessively drinking. I was away at a union educational last fall, and at the end of the week the one woman I became good friends with told me when she first got to the place she was scared and nervous but as soon as she seen me she felt she could sit next to me and she would be ok, when I asked her why she said it was because of my tattoos, she could tell I am someone who is comfortable with myself. And she was right, I am comfortable with me more now than I was before I ever got a tattoo. So those who judge, just remember just because we have tattoos doesn't make us much different than you, the only difference between us is that we aren't judging you. 

 
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May 29, 2006, 12:56 pm PDT

I think it isn't a sin

Quote From: ladybug11

no one says if you have tattoos  you are a bad  person!  its whats on the inside that counts. but  tattoos  and periceings   make people look  nasty  and  messes there looks up!!!   thats all i am saying!!!   god  did not want us to harm our bodys  and  put ink in your skin!  its a sin!!  

Hello Ladybug, you are saying that putting tattoos on your skin is a sin. Since when did god say that? I have never heared of something like that out of the bible and I also think that god wouldn't say something like that. Not because I definately know what god says, but it's just my opinion. You SAY that it's a sin, so yours is more a statement. So I want to know, is yours a statement or just your opinion? And why? I mean, I understand that you think it's ugly, but why do you say it like it is the truth? You don't let other people get through you with their opinion. Maybe it would be good to try. Because if you won't listen to other people, people will keep arguing with you, and not listening to you. I hope you understand what I'm saying, and that this doesn't make you angry, because it's not my meaning to make you angry. It's still very wise of you to say that what's on the inside counts. That's a very good opinion.  

 
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May 29, 2006, 12:58 pm PDT

Cindi...chill baby

Cindi,  

oh remember the Olive Garden.we were wild we got crazy P.BREST email me  

 
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May 29, 2006, 1:22 pm PDT

Tatoos

Tattoos have always grossed me out. One of these day there will be a lot of grandmas out there making plastic surgeons rich. If you are ever is doubt of what to do when you grow up, learn laser surgery for tattoos. You will make a killing
 
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May 29, 2006, 1:41 pm PDT

The Secret of Sexual Abuse

Dear Dr. Phil:  

   

I know everyone is entitled to their own thoughts and opinions, and here's mine: It saddens me that most people on here today (message board) are more concerned or have more to say about the young girl with tattoos you spoke with, than with the girl who finally admitted to her mother that she was being sexually abused (for years) by her former stepfather. This is a serious problem among our children and teens that is not going to go away. There are many, many adults such as myself who bear the emotional scars of sexual abuse and will do so until the day we die. There are many hurting people out there, and because the disgusting, selfish, perverts out there convince our children that they're to blame, that they have something to be ashamed for, or threaten them, then these types of stories will for the most part remain secrets.   

   

Please readers, if you or someone you know is being sexually abused (remember, that can mean everything from being raped to having someone expose themselves to you, harmful touching, watching you without your permission, etc.) TELL SOMEONE! Take the power away from these wretched excuses for human beings. I was unable to put my former stepfather in jail because I didn't deal with the repercussions of my abuse until I was around 37 years old (8 years ago). I was told by a detective that I had to be able to remember if the pervert actually touched my breasts or vaginal areas. I honestly couldn't remember, although I'm sure it happened as I was a deep sleeper when it first began. I actually told my mother when I was around 20yo, and she told our pastor (pastor at that time). Unfortunately, the stepfather was a good faker/actor, and convinced the pastor he was sorry. Yeah, right, he was sorry I finally told. The police were not contacted at that time. My mom didn't know what to do at that time. So we pretended to be a normal family, until at age 37 I could no longer repress the memories that just wouldn't go away; I also had a daughter to protect. Fortunately, my mother finally divorced the jerk, and she & I received much needed counseling. But the memories won't go away.  

   

I now live over 150 miles away from him, but the memories will follow me wherever I go. I wish I'd been strong enough to tell someone, anyone, what was happening to me. So again, I plead with those reading this, please tell someone if you're a victim or know of one. There are those who might be spared this nightmare.  

   

The pervert is now remarried and has access to anyone's children. If I could keep him away from children for the rest of his life, I would do so, but I don't know how. So, I'm looking to do whatever I can to prevent this from happening in my little corner of the world, beginning with my church. I helped to birth The Safe Place Team, a ministry dedicated to protecting my church's children from all types of abuse, as well as safety hazards, etc. I decided long ago that I wasn't going to be a victim any longer, and I know that God does not allow things to happen for no reason. I believe He will use me to help or protect others.  

   

Thank you so much for reading. And Dr. Phil, please continue to bring the exploitation of our nation's children to light, as they need all the advocates they can get., especially from folks such as yourself who have the necessary tools available to actually see some justice exacted.  

   

A Country Mom in MD  

P.S. Oh, and by the way, the former stepfather? He was a high school teacher, and a church youth group leader during the years he was abusing me. Don't be fooled, they come in all shapes and sizes.  

   

   

   

   

 
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May 29, 2006, 1:41 pm PDT

Tattoos are lame

Tattoos are simply a way of drawing attention to yourself for the WRONG reason. Just like nose and tongue piercing, purple hair, Goth clothing, etc.  

  

If you are in such desperate need of attention then why not get an education and do something positive in life. The Goth lifestyle is for depressed, losers in life.  

 
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