Topic : Potty Training

AMEN!  My son is 3 1/2 and I am having the opposite problem - he urinates in the potty every time but won't poop in it.  I have been consistent and tried everything I can think of and I'm still fighting this battle.  Kids ARE all different and you can't accuse a parent of not inconsistency just because the child won't cooperate!

My daughter learned to sign at 7 months, was walking by 9 and I THOUGHT she was going to be potty trained by the time she was a year. I had her go everytime I went and even set a timer to have her try to go every hour. It worked for a couple of months she would say "mama potty" and we would run to the bathroom only to play with the flusher not actually go potty. She would say "potty" but didnt really have to go. Now she doesnt even tell me she just squats. Im at a loss of ideas and dont know what else to do. My husbands presuring me to get her trained because of the cost of diapers but what can I do if she just isnt going? Am I doing something wrong?

Out of Ideas,

  Ade

i think your just pushing her too much. she is early with walking, but she did that at her own pace! so you should let her decide her own pace here too. in the netherlands most kids are potty trained at three, so you have about two years before you should start worrying. if you push her too much, she might start to dislike it, or become afraid to fail. so just stop pushing, and let her decide. and as for the diapers, that's too bad for your husband.............

Early walking is one thing...but her muscles and nerves in her bladder/rectal area aren't ahead. They are on the same schedule everyone else's are.  You can't learn to make your body develop fast. You can't teach her muscles and nerves to mature. She simply isn't feeling it, she is simply not ready.

You are going to have to tell you husband to stop pushing because hell, if he didn't want to pay for diapers he shouldn't have had a kid....people pay for diapers up to 4 years old...that's the deal when the stick turns pink.

I can understand, or I can try anyway...you have a kid who did a few things early and now everyone is expecting her to be some kind of miracle perfect baby...but she's not. She's just a regular kid who will probably learn to potty train like every other kid.

Hi,

My name is Miriam. I have a 3 yr. old, Joseph, and we have a difficult time potty training.  The problem is that he will go pee-pee in the potty  on his own, but mainly in his trainer pants and then will run to the potty...not to mention the other dirty mess I have to clean as well. He has that much sence to go in the potty, but out of lazyness, or being afraid he will miss something, won't make it to the bathroom. Going poop in the potty is another story.  I need help. I usually will take him by the arm and say let's go potty, but with it follows some fussing around. I live with my inlaws and through some frustration we are now finally on the same page with the underwear rule.  I have started training him since July '07, but are still in need of some help. It's already Sep. '07and I don't know what else I can do to break him from marking his territory and pooping in his pants.

                                                                                                              Thanks for your time,

                                                                                                                                Mia

hi , I am a grandma of a 3 1/2 yr old. she has been completely potty trained, going on her own but wiping when pooping. Now for this past 2 weeks she has been going backwards instead of forwards. At her house her mom said she will poop in her pants 2 times each night. Here when I have her she will sit in the little kids chair in play room and pee in it. The play room is right next to the bathroom Does anyone have any suggestions????

Okay, so you thought she'd be trained by the time she was a year, but when did you start training her and what method did you use? The reason I ask is that I started taking my son to the potty at 3 weeks, and rather than use a timer, we used a combination of behavioral cues and "timing." By that I mean we took him to the potty when we knew it was very likely that he'd go - right after he woke up, right after he ate, etc.

 

Signing is very good, but it's important that the sign stays connected to an actual need. It sounds like you got a little too attached to your schedule and turned the potty work into a game. She may also have picked up on your self-imposed deadline of having her finish by 1 year, and this may be a source of stress for her. One final thing to keep in mind - any kid will slow down or even regress when approaching a major developmental milestone. That's why behavioral cues are so important. They not only tell you when the kid needs to go, but also what else might be going on in their lives.

 

My advice is to step back and re-assess what you've done up to this point. Then, take a deep breath and re-engage. Just be sure to make it pleasant, matter of fact, and completely non-coercive. Skip the Pull-ups and go straight to underwear, and have her help clean up any messes. Not as punishment, but as a natural consequence of not going in the potty. Oh - and what's with your husband pressuring YOU to get her trained? What's wrong with HIM engaging in this process with you???

 

My son, by the way, was on a developmental trajectory similar to your daughter. He finished potty training (pee and poop) at 22 months. There are significant advantages to finishing up before the toddler oppositional behavior sets in, but the whole process has to be as gentle and loving as possible.

Oh, yes, he's ready...  Kids are much smarter than we give them credit for -- speak plainly and frankly to him and expect him to understand, if he doesn't he'll let you know. Here's the thing if he takes his dipe off then he knows he's messy and doesn't like it; that is a good indicator. But if he goes on the patio then he already knows when he needs to go -- that's beyond ready and nearly done.  You just need to direct where he chooses to go.   I don't believe your issue is with your son at all but with your husband.  I have 5 kids all under 7; every time I start trying to potty train I have a hard time getting my husband on board...  Let's face it, it is much easier to clean up a mess in a diaper than a mess in underpants, or floor, or patio.  Have you thought about using the whole patio thing as your key to success?  Maybe put a potty chair out there then start moving it closer to the door, then inside, then into the bathroom, then on to the big potty.  Might work for him and would show your hubby that your son is ready...  worth a try!!!  If your husband just doesn't want your son to associate the patio with the potty then daddy and big brother need to stop modelling the behavior to him.  I would try putting the potty out there first as suggesting to my hubby that he change his own behavior would make him want to pick a fight.

My issue has been a total regression in my 3 yr old after the arrival of her baby brother and sister.  She was almost completely trained a year ago, then back to stage one.  I've been working with her for months (in panties not dipes) and I am finally starting to see a change in her attitude -- wanting to be a big girl rather than a baby.  I don't think it's a boys or girl issue at all, I just think all kids develop at  a different rate and some are more willful than others -- you just have to keep trying til you find a techinique that clicks.  The key is to be more determined than your child (or hubby) and remember that it is worth it in the end!!!

  Hello My name is Joyce and I have a 2year old daughter Genevieve (just turned 2 Sept 2, 2007). She uses the potty at daycare but not at home I put panties on her and she will pee in them and not even tell me. Yet just before her birthday she was using the potty at home sometime but she was doing very well and now she tells her father and I “No Pee-pee on the potty mommy and daddy.” What can I do?