Topic : Teen Dating

Hi.  I am 14 and I agree, that is a very hard situation.  I know that you are right, but it is hard for me to say because I can see from your daughter's point of view too. 

You don't want her going other places, so you are right not to scream.  That will drive her away and then if you keep her locked up, it will most likely make her angry, withdrawn, and will damage both of you emotionally. 

I think you need to talk with her about dating.  Look back at her level of trust with you, and maybe you can work towards a relationship where you can talk about boundaries without being the leash-holding parent. 

However, you do need to let her know how you feel.  Instead of telling her what she should do, tell her how YOU feel. 

Start with that, and if you still feel like you need to step in and be the parent, do that.  But you have the right idea. 

It works with my mom and I.  But every relationship is different. 

I think you should call up Dr. Phil. 

Seriously.  It would help a lot of people. 

Good luck! 

It doesn't take hemp and whiskey to make a mom apprehensive about her 13 year old dating. 

Don't even try the "wouldnt let him touch me" because you pointed out that he was cute, right? 

I am 14 so we are around the same age.  I understand, but I can't reach out and move your mom's opinion. 

But I can give you some pointers. 

First of all, you should start talking to your mom casually, build up your relationship.  Don't come across to her as whining about boyfriends because that will make her wonder, why does she want this so badly? 

Also, don't protest to her and call yourself innocent because when you whine like that, it also may make your mom think that you want a "boyfriend" for the wrong reasons (solely immature hormones, power over her to feel older, etc.) 

You seem really anxious, but that's why your mom may be right. 

Dating is a casual, fun pastime and you should not fret about it.  Hang out with guys and girls together and get a hang of getting close to guys, build up her trust.  Then you may be able to start dating. 

But start by asking if you can even invite a guy over.  This is a favorite with parents.  If you seem like you aren't hiding anything, she will trust you and that cute guy a lot more!  But she may still not let you guys go solo.  But then again, group dating is still fun! 

Good Luck!   

      Hi, im new to this site, and well, i am a sixteen year old girl.  Now, im sure most of you are thinking "Ah, to be that age...." *laughs* but well, despite all the " perks " of being this age, i am still 'afraid'/grossed out by kissing.  For the last six monthes, ive been going out with a guy older then me and well until two weeks ago, i broke up with him.  But within those six monthes, of coarse being a man, he liked kissing and doing other things.  Surprisingly, i didnt mind the other things, but when it came to touching my face, and my mouth, i freak out.   

      shortly after i broke up with that man, i got together with a guy i actually enjoyed the company of.  And we've been going out ever since.  All my friends say we make a cute couple, but the thing there always saying is that we do everything, ((but no, NOT everything.  You crazy! i may get Fail's in my classes, but im smart enough NOT to do that when im this young!!!)), except kiss, or, "make-out". 

      Its apparent that this behavior is not normal for girls my age, but i just dont know why am i the only one who ((seemingly)) feels this way.  Have any of you ever felt this way before?  Thank you so much for reading this!  

PS: Im new to this site, and its my first time posting, So im reallllllyyy reallllyyyyy sorry if this is the wrong place to put this question. thanks again!!! 

Oh my.   

 Well, i know how your daughter feels.  im 16 now, but until a few weeks ago, i was going out with an 18 year old, he was a senior in my freshman year (( him 17, me 15 )).So i was in the same position she was in.   

I REALLY dont mean to be a bad thing for your daughter, but i did not like this man.  I hope your daughters boyfriend is different from the one i had, because my grandparents, (( i live with them)) thought he was a nice boy too, nothing harmful about him.  But well... i really didnt like him.  He was very immature for his age and lacked responcbilty. I went out with this man for six monthes, but was fed up by the way he treated me. It was ironic how unassertive he was at times, needing someone to lead him to a place hes been to longer than the person hes asking, and yet, when he wanted something, he'd be more aggresive then a dog in heat.   

after a while, my gramma let me go over his house, with his mom there and such.  But we were able to be in his room, with the door closed.  Long story short, in all honesty, i think 'Men' who go out with 'Girl's do it because they know they can (( most anyways)), and take full advantage of that. One of my female friends that was the same age as him told him to his face that the only reason why hes going out with me is because no one there age would with him because hes too immature, selfish and lazy, not wanting to do anything for anyone unless it benefits himself.  She was right, but until a little later on in the relationship, i knew this as a truth. 

After being with a man older then me for that long, i relized i didnt like it. Takeing it as a learning expierence, i remember what happand within those six monthes and now know what i want in a relationship.  It's kinda sad, or ironic, that a few days aftrer the break up, ive been going out with this new guy.  We've been really good friends for a long time, and he cared about me alot, even during my relationship with the man.  How i knew this was because he'd be just as passiniot about the things that happand to me and took them seriously as much as i did.  No, i dont mean music or games, but what was happanding in my life at that time.  

hope this helps!!! 

     i am 15 an i have a great boyfriend that i have had for almost a year.  i know i am young but i know that i love him (its not hard to love him, he is that sweet) but anyways that not the point i don't think his mom likes me all that much. i have never done anything to her and i am always polite (you know i call her Mrs. smith and stuff like that) i don't really like sit down and have a convo with her or anything because 1 i don't think she likes me, and 2 because i get so nervous that i don't know what to say so i don't say anything.  what can i do to open up to her and let her get to know me and find out how sweet i am and to build trust with her?? is there anything that i can do??