Topic : Teen Dating

You are not being too pushy.  But if you are upset that your mother is talking to family members ask her if what is said between you can be kept confidential.  I know your mother is not trying to hurt or embarrass you.  She probably just needs to talk to someone too about the best way to be a parent. 

If you want more privilages it is imparative you be honest with her.  Maybe she sees something in your relationship with this boy that you don't.  Have you thought about finding someone else to go out with?  Also would this other girlfriend of your ex like it if she new you were still seeing him? What do you think?  I have a daughter who does not talk to me about anything in her personal life. I don't even know who she is going out with and she lies and manipulates to get what she wants. And for that she has very little privilages (she can't date until we meet her boyfriends) You sound like a very mature young woman and I think if you talk to your mother about your feelings you can negotiate something that you both can handle.  But if you clam up and hide yourself to your mother she will know and hold back giving you more privilages.  Do you talk to your mother about everything?  Or not? I think you are going to become 18 and you want more space but you have to show your mother that you are more mature about your life.  So discuss with her you feelings and I am sure you can come to some kind of negotiation. Good luck!!! 

Hello! I was reading what you were saying and I understand your feelings.  But there are laws with regard to adults who are dating kids under 18 years of age.  Some states have statutory laws that are automatically enforced without parents permission.  This means if  you are dating and having intimate relationships with 20 years old and you are at the age of 16.  That 20 year old is running the risk of being prosecuted and facing up to 15 years in prison.  So you parents not allowing you to date older men is not only to protect you, it is to protect the young men you are dating from anything serious happening to you.  I understand you are 16 and want more freedoms to make choices for yourself.  I remember being your age and dating and wanting more independance.  But think that if your parents find out that you are sneaking and lying to them how they would feel and what your consequences would be if they knew.  Also most 20 year old boys if you express to them that you respect you parents rules and won't go against that because they know what is best. Most boys that age who really like and respect you will understand and look up to your honestly.  They won't look at you as a baby.  I think if you really like a 20 year old and want to date. Talk with your parents about it.   Tell them honestly how you feel.  They will respect you for it and maybe you both can negotiate new terms for showing your honesty. I hope this help.  Working on my marriage and family degree. Thanks!!Michelle 

Hey! 

I'm going to be 16 next week. 

I've "dated" since I was 13, though my mom didn't consider it dating. 

Grade 9 was my first serious boyfriend, we were only aloud on the main level of the house because my parents didn't want me having sex and such. The odd time they'd leave us home alone, we'd kiss but no oral sex or anything, being raised and taught whats apporopriate and when and leanring to trust a person first, that's helped my dicissions. I can also tell my mom EVERYTHING. If I thought I was ready to have sex, I'd talk to my mom first because I know she knows way more about it then me. Try to be open with your daughter. Maybe let her go out with guys but not let them in her room alone for a little while, make sure they are mature about there relationship. My parents don't like me "cuddling" on the couch, they think its inappropriate. I think this is pretty dumb becuase atleast we arent upstairs..... 

and we dont cuddle in public. 

I am not going back out with my 1st serious boyfriend, we developed a really good friendship and even if we did break up I know wed be best friends. 

Good luck! 

Sara Diane 

I would really like some advice about my boyfriend. He will say stuff like, "This girl on the internet is more fun to talk to than you." or there's this girl Miriam that he liked briefly while we were dating and he will say stuff like, "Ya I had sex with Miriam, I'm sorry." and then start laughing and say "You know I'm just kidding right?" He says that he's just joking, but when he says stuff like this it's really hurtful to me. Is this just a normal guy thing or am I just overreacting? Do I need to talk to him about it and ask him to stop? Also, the other day he wanted to spend some time with me and he said something teasing and I walked out of the room just teasing him back. I found out later that he was really mad about what I did. I appologized, but then he kept saying, "So how are you going to make it up to me?" What should I do? Please help!