Topic : Teens and Sex

Punish? hasn't she been punished enough already? Or do you think she enjoys her fanny being on youtube and all of her friends having seen it? I mean it really isn't a fun thing to have everyone laugh at you for having showed yourself.
You much rather need to talk to her about it, talking about what happened and how she feels now. She made it and sent it to a boy not willing that the whole world would see. Punishment is the last thing she needs. She won't do it twice I can assure you.

Well as dr Phil has said time and again YOU are her parent and so YOU need to discipline, he has no say in the matter (he can only suggest.)
Spying on your daughter seems wrong to me, it sends out the wrong signal to her. You want a relationship based on trust not distrust. Besides how would you ever use this material if she ever found out you bugged her room she'll give you hell to pay for sure and in my opinion for good reason.
Another thing that votes against it is that it could damage your daughter because if she finds out she might not feel she has a private spot and will become more distrusting.
Not dating until 16 is plain wrong, it is within her age range to date, she needs some practice in dating and also in sex (like it or not) before she settles down with a guy. Not dating could harm social skills or she might have a problem with being close in a relationship. It is typical teenage behavior. Besides how where you going to enforce it? You can't watch her 24/7 right?
No I'm with you on this one.

Right, unless you lock him up in his room 24/7 but that will probably make him kill himself. Can't be what you want either...

I honestly dont see what the big deal is about the "sexting" I'm 17 and I've seen some of my lady friends naked over the internet-whoop-te-do!

I don't know why, but I felt I needed to post this even if it is off topic.  I was a freshmen in highschool last year and honestly was suprised to find out how many girls and guys were doing such suprising and disgusting things at such a young age.  Really, the stories I overheard in my classes were really disgusting.....girls fifteen and younger talking about doing it with multiple boys over the age of eighteen and more under that age....and then boys that talked about the same thing with girls.  Now Dr. Phil is going to have a special on a 15 year old girl getting pregnant and he seems suprised.......I can no longer be suprised by such things.

Wow there.  Something is terribly wrong.  This kind of behavior cannot be tolerated, the very first thing that I would do if I were a parent is not only strip the child of his TV, but of his computer, game systems, and all other forms of entertainment except for the educational kind.  Make sure that they still do have something to do that is fun, but that encourages values rather than is just entertaining.   Try sitting down a couple of times a week to play a family board game or something....let him choose the game so that it will be entertaining for both you, your family, and him.  If he says that he does not feel like doing it then encourage him to do something else that  promotes morals....just spending more time than usual with him....maybe going to a theme park with the family or a town fair.  A physician is not always the answer....you should try to change the environment around the person before trying to get a "quick fix".  Try having him read the book Seven Habits For Highly Effective Teens- or play a radio station that has people that give advice out to others on while he is around.

 After loosing trust in him he will have to gain it back slowly with you.  You should clean out his room of everything so as there is no spot where he can hide things, when he shows you that he has made progress and is changing his ways then you slowly give him back the things that he enjoys....but you make things like the TV and Computer last.....when he does get things back, just to make sure he does not do anything to get back into his bad habits make sure that they have strict filters on them so that inappropriate  things cannot be accessed.

To start out I would do what I said above.....if your child says he hates you, you should reply to him that what you have done is not permanent and that if he changes his ways you will let him have things back.  Let him know that because he cannot help himself you have chosen to help him....whether he wants the help or not...as he is  hurting not only himself-but the people around him as well. 

Another thing, behavior like this-if not properly tackled could pose serious problems in the future.  You could see your child become something that no parent in their right mind would want to see their own become.  Like I said...the problem should not be handled by taking him to the doctor or something...you should treat the problem at home by changing the environment around him, and changing the way you treat him.  Respect of others and trust should be a given....but in this case he will have to earn it and when he gives it to the people around him....he will get it back.

Yeah sure, make him sexually frustrated, punish him for acting like a sexual human being and make sure he needs a psychologist for real in a few months (if there is no need for one now.) Though I don't think it is allright for him to tape his sister It still could be normal for him to wear womens underwear. Some people just get turned on by (wearing) female clothing, and there is nothing wrong with that, in other cases there might be. But in this the cause of him wearing the underwear is important.

As for the porn, he is human get over it most men (and women actually) his age have watched porn.

No, you are not punishing him for that.  What I was trying to say is that the second he brought his sister into it it went too far...if it had not gone too far already.  When you cross that bar, it is time to act.   You said it is normal to wear womans underwear...that is exactly the point.....they were not womans underwear, they were his three year old sisters (now four).    Do you find that to be normal and acceptable....his three year old sisters underwear?  I don't.

 

If I were you, I would be worried about an 18 yr old having sex and getting the girl pregnant or getting HIV, not about WHERE he gets the girl pregnant or where he gets HIV. You need to set your priorities straight.

 

I don't want to disrespect you, but the sex-before-marriage deal is not important i this issue. I do, however, agree that if he knows that you don't like him having sex in your house, he should go elsewhere. It's important for him to know the risks of sex, of course. Education of the key to preventing avoidable things from happening.

 

As for your husband... Well.. I don't agree with him. Whe your kids move out, they have their own space where they can have all the sex they want without bothering anyone else. I think it's disrespectful of his son to ignore you, as if you were a painting on a wall. 

After all, I was 11 something when I started watching. And just for people to know, I'm not having sex, not do I plan on having sex, nor do I want to be a pornstar.

 

People is like all OMG to porn, but seriosly, what's the big deal? As long as it's not kiddie porn, no-one is harmed by it (unless it's an addiction).