Topic : Troubled Teens

No....I'm not on medication for depression. There are many reasons why, but it's mainly a personal choice I made.

You have a lot of medical issues...it's perfectly understandable that you're having difficulty coping. Especially at your age...it can be hard, b/c you feel separate from everyone else. Everyone else might appear to have these great lives, while yours feels like it's spinning out of control. I can assure you that none of them have the perfect life they pretend to have. It's all a facade to fit in. Teenage years are the hardest to get through...but you CAN get through them. At 17, you're almost out of school. I commend you for recognizing that your grades aren't all they can be, and attempts to bring them up. That takes dedication on your part, and hard work.

Whatever you do...don't quit school. My own son dropped out and he's regretted it every day of your life. MOST places (even places like McDonald's) want you to have a high school education to work there. You just keep on going...keep up the fight, and you'll get there sooner than you realize.

I agree with the other poster who advised seeking counseling. I think it would really be beneficial to you. It HELPS to talk things out with someone else...someone who can understand what you're going through. They've got useful tools at their disposal to help you with some of the issues you face...such as being stressed. If you can't talk to your mom, talk to your school counselor. She can talk to your mother with you.

Hang in there, hon....you're going to get through this and come out on the other side a wiser person for it. Much luck and love..................

Yes I am a very negative person at times. Yeah I am trying to bring my grades up and I usually do get very good grades but yeah right now they are down. Yes I am on medicine for my Depression. Yeah it is very overwhelming and stuff. Yeah I do have my whole life ahead of me. But yeah please write me back at MacaroniAndCheese93@hotmail.com

 

Thanks

Whitney

I am on medication for Depression. Yeah teenage years are the hardest to get through. Yeah I am almost out of school. Yeah thanks I realize my grades aren't that good right now and that I need to bring them up. And I am in the process of doing that but I normally do get very good grades. Yeah I definitely don't want to work at McDonalds all my life. I usually talk to my school consulelor cause he knows what I am going through. We have 4 of them at our school but I am at his end of the alphabet but yeah he is nice and he knows what I am going through and gives me good advice. Yeah I am definitely not going to quit out of high school cause I am planning on going to Des Moines Area Community College to be a Veternarian Assistant so yeah. Anyway well please email me at MacaroniAndCheese93@hotmail.com. I hope things are going good for you. Take care. I will talk to you later.

Whitney

No need to aploligize at all.  I didn't feel you were attacking me I neglected to say I was in Canada and we have some back woods laws here in regards to teens and ages of concent.  I have turned her in and apparently a few people turned her in.  This is not going to stop her.  She is a crazy lady.  Nobody knows why she started this vendeta with me and my family, nobody knows why she felt the need to brainwash my son against me and remove him from the family home.  Apparently to her I am just neglectful to my 16yr old son and not my two girls.... So far this woman has told my husbands family that I am a crack head, my bills are so far in arears that we are on the verge of bankrupcy, that I have drained our savings to nothing due to drug use.  ( I find the claims of drug use incredibly insane as I am the most anti-drug person in the world )  She has coached my child into calling the police on me, she has taken me to court.  This is just the short list.  The irony is she is family.  This woman has alienated her children from all of their fathers, grandparents, aunts and uncles she couldn't do anymore to them so she started on my family.  This woman is a thief, a lier and a manipulator and there isn't a darn thing I or anybody else can do about her.  Its sad that my family has to live in fear of what this woman will do next to our family.  Oh there will be  more.  She is relentless.  Thanks for the support and listening to my rant and godspeed Im glad your family is coming together after all of the issue's you, yourself suffered.

Hello,

 

I was hoping to get some suggestions about a situation with my nephew., Brandon. He is living with his mother who treats him as if he is her best friend. What I mean is she shares very private stuff with him such as when she has had an abortion. I believe she may be prostituting herself as she does not have a job, but my nephew says that she has many men coming and going who help her with her car payments and mortgage. Ever since he has been old enough to be in school he has missed many days. Now the mothers brother who just got out of prison for 7 years is living in the home and he is doing drugs and has become violent with both the mother and my nephew. When the police were called the mother and Brandon had to lie to keep Danny from getting in trouble. Now Brandon is learning how to be a very good lier and manipulator as he has learned from his parents as examples. Brandon's dad ( my brother) is not in the best shape either. He is self employed and does not have good parenting skills and I don't see that he is a good role model for Brandon. I live 100 miles away, I am single and don't have any children of my own. I need to know what do I do. Do I call social services to report my concerns? Do I confront the mother? Do I consider taking Brandon to live with me? He is 13 and he is at a cross roads in his life....I hope it is not to late and that he can be saved, but I think somethings are already engraved in his makeup. There is alcoholism in both families and I am afraid that he has the ism too! Any suggestions would help me.

Thank you

Good grief. You're really up against it, aren't you? I'm the FIRST person to concede that sometimes there just isn't anything left to be done. Had my son not straightened out, when he turned 18 that's exactly where I would be. Nothing else to do with the whole thing. Sometimes, the facts are what they are and there are times when our hands get tied. I found out only too well how very HARD it is to get help when you have a troubled teen. Had it not been for ONE person that gave me an 800# (which isn't in the phone book or any other directory, btw)...I wouldn't have known where to turn myself. And likely I would have lost my son...if not to drugs, to the streets, then to the juvenile detention center. I'd no longer be his mother...the state I live in would be. They would be his legal guardians, and not have to check with me about boo. I was lucky, and I know that.

That being said....no doubt you're still in turmoil regarding your son. I know where you live isn't exactly great when it comes to getting counseling for yourself...your country doesn't pay for it, and it's cost prohibitive. If not for that, I'd suggest that YOU go for counseling yourself. It's hard to have a child that is "out there"..doing things that you know is going to likely destroy his life. And it's like a runaway freight train headed right for you and you can't stop it. It's a totally helpless and frustrated feeling. I know..I've been there. Add to the mix a family member who is apparently hell-bent on destroying you personally...and I don't see how you do it. You DO need support. You DO need *someone* on your side. Just know that the people who truly love and care about you will walk IN the door when everyone else is walking out. They know you, and how you are. They wouldn't believe a lie told about you.

I would think about all you can do at this point is attempt to hang on to your own sanity. Take care of yourself. Because you're going to need to be there when the bottom drops out on your son's life and he comes back. I've seen it only TOO many times. These kids who think they know the world and its' ways end up in a bad situation, and the first place they run is home. Maybe one of these days he's going to return with a lot of bad habits under his belt, looking for help. In the meantime..you need to take care of yourself so that you can deal with whatever the future dishes out. And it doesn't sound like it's going to be good. But that doesn't mean that you can't make every attempt to have your own life happy and successful. It's hard...especially  when you're tortured by an out of control child. Just know that eventually, he's going to return. Worse for the wear, but he'll come back. You can't lie down with dogs and not get up with a few bites to show for it.

I hope that you're able to find some peace and comfort for your life. I wish you well........

As a precautionary measure, I would like to keep a drug test on hand for our teenage son.  Has anyone had any experience with these, and can you recommend a particular brand?  A search on the internet turned up quite a few different varieties and I'm not sure what I should order.

 

Thanks! 

My daughter's stepson, age 16 1/2 is antisocial.  He spends most waking hours on the computer, but presently is not allowed to use it.  He comes into the kitchen only to grab and eat food, leaving a mess.  He sometimes goes to his dad's mother's for a couple of days at a time. He had been skipping school and they got him into a special high school which worked for a few months but now doesn't go there either. He spent most of his childhood with an alcoholic, dyfunctional mother.  I think he nees a boarding school.  My daughter and her husband (his dad) have a 7 year old son and they don't want him influenced or worse, harmed by this teenager.  He has "playfully" put his hands around the younger brother's throat.  He curses at anyone who tells him what to do.  How can I help them find a place that can help him? I live in NY, they are in Cambridge, MA.

Go to your favorite drug store and ask the pharmacist. They will advise you.