Topic : Troubled Teens

If you have mental health insurance I would recommend calling them and asking what intensive programs are available to you. Usually they are short term, 7-10 days to get the child stable enough to function while going to outpatient therapy. 

  

State facilities are bound by state laws so if that is your only option it is better than nothing. Also call your county mental health department if you do not have insurance. They work on fee schedules according to income. They have in home programs, intensive programs, and out patient programs. 

  

These are disturbing symptoms for you to try and handle alone. 

  

My daughter has bipolar and has been hospitalized 4 times since 2003; it is not fun but by all means sometimes very necessary to make sure they do not hurt themselves or others.  

  

If you need help finding additional places for help please let me know I wouldn't mind helping look for something. 

  

I hope you find the help you and your families need. 

Take care 

Tammy 

  i logged onto this message board because my son seems as if he's starting to not care about his grades, but then compared to everyone's messages, this seems like such a small problem.  i would just like to comment about the teens that are having behavioral problems and being disrespectful to their parents, and you are losing control of them.  You need to really think about if this is the way that you've allowed them to act growing up.  Children need to be taught respect and need to be aware that you are in charge at a very young age.  I have 3 boys, ages 9,11, and 13 and am a single parent.  It has always been very clear to them what type of behavior will not tolerated.  They have always been taught to respect their elders and me, as their mother.  I can't say that they've been perfect angels, but they have never been disrespectful to me or questioned my authority.  I believe children have to be molded from the day they are born---as many are finding out , it is very difficult to try to reverse bad behavior.  You must be very clear about your expectations of them from the beginning.            

Perhaps you could share this message you posted.  

Too bad they are not listening to what you are saying. They are very fortunate to have a mature 18 yr. old willing to patch things with them. 

Your emotional health is very important, I beleive you'll make the right choices! God bless! 

Hey. I was hoping I could add a bit of light to this situation. I'm sixteen, I've been dealing with depression, mild OCD and anxiety problems and turned to cutting about five years ago. The reason I did it was because it was something I could control. God bless my family, but it was something that they couldn't touch (they've always been extremely over-protective). I remember times getting so angry, and knowing I couldn't express it because 'you can't make waves' and all that, that I took it out on myself rather than speaking up for myself.  

  

Not to say you do, but don't treat your son like he's crazy or a freak. I understand how painful this is for parents, but I know at the time I felt like my actions were only affecting me. It's my body, my time, you know. I still have the urge to cut and cause other harm to myself (I leaned towards burning a lot of the time) and have relapsed. It's like any other addiction. Good luck, and I'll keep you two in my thoughts.  

Hey hon.  

  

I know what you're saying, I live with my grandparents. I think they fight more than my actual parents did... they've just got a lot of unresolved issues, things that have happened before I was even born. I can't talk to my grandparents about depression or anything else, because it only puts an added burden on them. My mom basically thinks I'm faking everything or it's just 'growing pains'. I think she's just tired of dealing with me. My dad's not in the picture, he's got issues I don't even want to think about it. I've moved a lot, I've got some good friends here finally but then again I always feel like I've got to be happy for them, because they worry immensely. I'm sorry about what you're going through, my email is rosecolormyworld@hotmail.com if you ever want to get in touch and talk.  

With some teens, it's become a trend...which is sad that it might start out that way, and then they might get addicted.  Because I know from past experience that is addicting, and it's really hard to get out of once you've started.  If you're the boy's parent(which I assume you are), consider yourself somewhat fortunate that you know about your son...especially if he had the courage to tell you himself.  It's a very secretive thing, and most cutters don't want anyone to know at all...even their best friends.  I would talk to him about it, and there's a lot of ways that you can help...suggest outlets, such as if he enjoys art or some kind of sport.  Maybe suggest writing in a notebook, even though it might seem stupid to him.  If he's gotten himself out of past activities that he used to enjoy, that might be a big part of it.  Try and get him back into it.  It's what helped me! 

  

Hope I could help. 

Lots of hugs. 

You know what... 

most teens your age do not have as much patience as you do. And what i did,was packed my things and left.YOur parents seem to be really overprotected.If they dont listen to you,thats their fault.I moved out when i was 17.I know my advice isn't the best,and YES its very hard to just pack up and leave.But you seem you know what you want,so don't let anybody in your path!! 

I have a 15 year old grandson who is drug dependent (matijuana) becuase it's the only way he feels happy (suffers from depression). I am looking for a treatment center, camp and/or school that can wean him off of the drugs while treating him for his depression (medically and through counseling) so that he can be happy without drugs. If you know of any such places, or can recommend anything, please email me at heaslip@encode.com

I've wanted to write to Dr Phil for a while now for help, but the rest of the family isn't too keen on the decision.  I have a cousin who will soon be 19 years old and has been on a downward spiral for the past year or so.  It started approx. 6 months before graduating high school in June.  It came on suddently - she became defiant and suddenly wanted nothing to do with her mother and step father, who she has been raised by since 7 years of age.  She would go out and not come home and last January she chose not to come home at all and has been living wherever she can find a place - friends homes, boyfriends, people she met off the street and most recently with a boyfriend. 

  

She makes the poorest of decisions and can't keep down a job.  She had told my sister, who she use to divulge everything to, that she can't get a job because she is unable to produce a clean UA, drinks, and smokes marijuana.  She has become familiar to the law enforcement of her town given her choice in friends, jailbird boyfriend, and most recent criminal activity - just two nights ago she got together with several others and did damage to a persons vehicle for something she never even saw happen. 

  

Her mom, dad and step dad have tried everything.  They have not helped her with bills in hopes she will mature and see they need paid; they have taken away her car as the agreement was she'd pay insurance (which she doesnt do); etc.  My sister has offered to get her into college classes and we have offered her a free place to live and transportation as long as she's in college.  She refuses.  She tells people one thing and turns around and does the opposite.  This is draining on everyone involved, including the rest of the family watching this happen to someone with great potential! 

  

Any and all advice would be MUCH appreciated!!! 

 I have a 16 1/2 year old daughter who has a become very disrepectful over the last 8 months about. l tell her she needs to talk to her elders with respect and she tells me that she is not going to respect them if they don't respect her first. When I am following through with a consequence because of something she did or didn't do then the attitude kicks in. She yells in my face and then looks away, crosses her arms and won't reply when asked a question. We made an agreement about what would happen if she didn't do her chores and when I follow through with the plan all hell breaks lose. She acts like a 2 year old throwing a tantrum and she thinks crying will get her her way even though it doesn't she still just does give up.  She is very bullheaded .She always has an excuse why it isn't her fault, it is always someone elses fault. How do I get her to be respectful and to own what she does or doesn't do?