Topic : Stay At Home Moms

Hi All,

              My name is Mary, I'm 25yrs old and as of November a mother of two girls. I'm a stay at home mom (what a concept) and not very good at it. I cant get the baby to sleep or my 8yr old to act her age. This is the first time I have not needed or had a job in my adult life and I want to go back to work! lol

I love both of my girls. I miscarried four babies in between, so I know they are blessings. But I wish they had another mother. How sick is that? I play things  in my head that I should say or do but never do it. I love my better half but he leaves alot in my hands that a real mother should be able to handle.

While I'm here...does anyone have any tips on how to make a 7week old sleep?

I am a 26 year old mother of six and the thing that i always used was a good warm bath and a warm bottle of mile with a teaspoon of baby cereal in it and it always did the trick.... Hope you try it and it works..

                                                                                                      Jessica

Do You Feel Guilty For Needing Time Alone???
Current mood: mellow
Category: Religion and Philosophy

WELL DON'T...

You are not a machine, you were made in Christ's image and look how many times He had to go off and be alone....ahh never thought of it that way huh? Look, needing time alone is normal...feeling guilty for taking it is not...that is just the enemy whispering in your ear......"what's wrong with you? Why do you need time alone? Your kids don't get enough time with you as it is." You aren't going to be good to anyone if you don't take care of yourself first. You probably are already a wreck and need time, but you keep pushing ahead and making everyone around you miserable. (I say it cause I love you) :)

I wrote this letter to one our moms today....she expressed feeling guilty for needing time alone, this was my response to her....maybe it can help you too!

"Hey! I am glad you wrote....first you know what? It is ok for you to feel the way you do...it is OK! Deep breath. Sounds like you got a lot going on and you are trying to make a lot happen for you and your family and you know what? It is ok what you feel and it is normal for you to feel that way. The light at the tunnel is that you are moving and moving towards some people who can help...that is huge, so huge I wish I had that. I have to work really hard everyday to make things happen for my daughter with other people because everyone lives so far away...and I work from home and sometimes I need to break out and be alone. So you know what???? That is ok too.

It is ok for you and I and moms to say....TIME OUT! MOM NEEDS A TIME OUT. Once a month I go grocery shopping at 10 PM on a Saturday night. I get a coffee and walk around and ha ha....sounds dumb but, it works..and there is no one there to stress me out...and my husband and daughter are home sleeping. Or I go out to church on a Friday night or during the week. Or I pick one night every other week to just go out alone and get alone time. It doesn't matter what I am doing as long as I am setting the tone for myself and at home that, "mommy is going to go out for a bit."

We need that.....and if you experienced postpartum.....getting regular alone time to reboot and refresh is important!!! Don't feel guilty for looking forward to alone time. Instead when you feel guilty start by thinking.....its a mental health date for you....and check out. It helps me so much. Even when I'm like, what is 2 hours going to really do? I come home refreshed and ready for another week. Look you probably multi task like I do and sometimes I am beat...I am a mom a wife, a person a daughter....we wear lots of hats...so do me a favor and ease up on yourself and take a break......do it for me...because once you start doing that, you won't feel guilty for taking a break...you will feel guilty for letting your emotions and anger build up and taking it out on everyone else when you know you could have avoided it by just taking some time!!!!

Be well, and always write when you are lead to. Love ya! Visit us on myspace.com/brokenmoms or brokenmoms.com

Currently reading :
Broken Moms
By Liana Preble
Release date: 06 April, 2007

Im a 30 yr old sahm from upstate ny to three daughters

Im looking for moms to become friends with? please email me at nella772@yahoo.com, if u want to become freinds..

thanks, hope to hear from u soon!

My SAHM journey has been great.  I have learned so much from my boys (2 & 5).  I also went nuts at first, but we all got used to it and it all worke out.  Find a hobby.  I started to weave, I know it sounds crazy;  I bought a floor loom learned how to warp it and now make rugs and placemats.  I am trying to buy more looms so I can turn it into a business.  People really seem to love my work.  My dream is to have it for a business, weave from home and greet my kids as they get off from the school bus. Maybe???

You are doing the best you can and is what being a housewife is all about.  We as housewives deal with so much.  We tend to ask ourselves are we doing enough or contributing enough? Our days start early and end later then the spouse's sometimes.  That is something to be proud about.  It took me a couple of years to stop feeling guilty that I wasn't working. 

I do all that for my husband too but, even he understands not everything can get done.  I cook almost everything from (scratch saves money) and it does take a lot of time.  The dishes never seem to end.  It is kinda hard when you have your daily routines prevent you from getting into those projects you been meaning to do.  Like cleaning that closet out, gardening or the one thing that I have been meaning to do forever, going through my kids dressers and closets for clothes that are to small. 

My hubby's clean area focus is the garage.  He hates when I clutter the top of the washer or whatever.  This is his sanctuary to have a beer on Fridays after work.  LOL 

Like  the message from gdh, Wisconsin (my husbands from there too!) I am not the worlds greatest housekeeper either but the house is constantly being picked up and kept decent.  When My kids are grown up that will be my time to have the clean neat abode I have dreamed about. 

I feel as long as you keep up with your routine, and the house is decent, laundry is taken care of and of course your kids/hubby are feed and happy then everything is alright and there will be a time and place for those extra projects or just time to yourself to actually have a hobby.  It is true my kids as they get older I am able to get a little more and more done as they tend to occupy them selves more and more.

I have to say god bless you with more than 2 kids.  I have a 3 and 4 year old and its hard, I can't imagine 4.  It is a wonderful blessing to be parents.

Liz,

Las Vegas