Topic : Stay At Home Moms

Hello Everyone!

I am a new stay at home mom and love it.  My husband provides enough financially but I would like to go back eventually part time at least.  I think it would be good to start saving for college or for anything we might need a large amount that we might not have at the time.  I am torn between taking fun family vacations in the future and staying at home and raising my child.  I want to be the one that raises her but am not sure how to deal with the guilt of going back to work or staying home.  Both of the options are appealing in very different ways.

       Also I am worried that my children will become to attached to me.  I have a sister-in-law who cannott even go to the grocery store without having them scream and kick to go with her.  I know it is how you raise them but i am still concerned.

            Please help me!

The other day we went to the ped. doc. for the two youngest's yearly check up. The doc came in and said, "Are you excited about school starting?" I giggled, " YES!..oh you were talking to them". The doc just laughed and said, " I bet you are ". I don't know what to do first...get the laundry  completely caught up while I mop all the floors,.. or bush hog the fence lines on the farm so I can check em and fix em....Can't have the horses running loose in the neighbor's soy beans ya know. Maybe I'll have a little "me" time and pressure wash the house....Hey my kids start the 9th!...nah nah... I'll be thinking about you while I'm doing my run through the house!!! Don't go spraining you ankle or anything before the 10th.....you won't be able to get the full feeling of elation with crutches.

I know you new mommies think we are awful but us old mommies are tired and most of the cute wore off our kids when pre-puberty took over on the first born......enjoy those dirty diapers.....there are worse things: like hormones in a 10 year old.I say,  "The sky is sure a pretty shade of blue today"...... I hear, "UH HELLO! A shade is a darker color of blue ...the sky is light blue today... so it is a tint....and you know I hate light blue any way so why did you buy me that stupid light blue shirt ? You know purple is my favorite color....did they have a purple shirt like that? The purple on my bed is the best not the color of the wall or those pillows.....Why do you always get me everything in purple? Just cause it's my favorite color doesn't mean I want everything purple. Why can't you get me shirt like my friend at school it had sleeves to here and it was light blue.........

 I gotta go.....just thinking about it is making me light headed.....I need chocolate.....

HAGD!!!

Leslie

I hear ya! Now I will finally be able get my home clean without any of the kids dragging their toys out behind me. HECK, now I can play with the toys all by myself! (kids toys that is). lol!!! I think I am gonna throw myself a PARTY and make a CAKE and eat it all by MYSELF!!! (wouldnt that be great)? Then afterwards I am gonna JUMP on all the beds (since I am the one making them up anyway) and then I am gonna sit on my BUTT all day long (since hubby thinks I do anyway) and enjoy the peace and quiet!!! Oh I cant wait!!

I am looking foward to going to the stores by myself without having to hear my kids  yell " I WANT THIS, I WANT THAT". My 6 y/o son is looking forward to school this year , being in the first grade, however, my 5 y/o girl is not. (but I am ) hehehehe!! The school will have their hands full when she comes.  LOOK OUT KINDERGARTEN TEACHER!!! I just hope I dont have sit in the office everyday at school with my 5 y/o. (that would be a bummer).

Yep,  I am an oldie mommie too and I am tired but come August 10......YOOOOO-HOOOOO!!!!!!!!!

Why, for some reason, I am beginning to feel like I will soon be FREE!!!!! OH WHAT A WONDERFUL FEELING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

(you young mommies will see what we old mommies are talking about, one day).  hehehehe!!!

   If we added some music and a little choreography, we could take this act on the road!!!!Desperate Housewives......You have no idea!!!! I feel like Mel Gibson at the end of Braveheart.....Freeeedoooommmm!!!!!(Of course my intestines are still in tact ,but there are days..)

  Your hubby thinks you sit on your butt all day too? I love it when I do something like get grass on the floor when I come in from mowing, and I hear,  " Your getting that all over the bathroom ". I'm thinking , "Well I guess I'll just have to be nice to the maid and clean it up....oh wait, we don't have a maid, so it will be me cleaning it up anyway, so I'll make all the mess I want.  Maybe I should send me to my room.....yeah ...I think I have chocolate hidden in there....and books....haven't read anything lately....there's a TV in there ...I bet that DVD player will play a non-animated-grown-up-boo-hoo-if-you-want-to Chick Flick.".......ha haha

  Last year my youngest started Kgarten and the first morning, she got on the bus and was so stoked to go, didn't even look back to say bye.....Girl, you couldn't wipe the smile off my face with a disc sander....Dr. Phil says don't raise children....raise adults.....Independent, self sufficient, confidant adults....right? Also it was the first peaceful day I'd seen in 2&1/2 months....so...new mommies be disgusted with me now....then call me in about sixteen years and if your still disgusted... I'll be nearly sixty and won't remember what you are talking about...."My girls were a joy, never gave me a minutes trouble"...Ha ha

 Well girl I'm rambling there's bound to be something in need of cleaning around here. Keep posting me . We are funny!

Leslie

I am a stay at home mom and have been for around 11 years now. The reason I started staying home with my children to begin with is that my husband started his own business and had to work long hours including weekends. I was basically a single parent. He didn't want me to work because the money I made wouldn't justify him having to come home at a certain time for me to go to work so he could watch our child. He said that all of my money would just go to a babysitter and wouldn't be worth it.He has basically talked me out of every job I have tried to get.  I felt and still do feel worthless. He gets all the praise for being such a hard worker, he makes all the money and nobody really cares what I do, especially his side of the family. I always get the "what do you do" guestions and feel so embarrassed to say I stay home with my children. Because the answer is usually, wow, your lucky you don't have to work. Most of the time I just break down and cry in private because staying at home is WORK and nobody sees what I do, they just think I live the great life or I'm too lazy to work and my husband pays all the bills, how lucky is that. Actually I have come to feel alot of anger towards my husband about this. His business is doing really good now and I feel that now it's my time to get out and work and be around adults, but he would only do this if I could make as much money as he is making. I have been soo depressed about this for soo long.I used to take my kids everywhere and try to get them involved in experiencing and learning new things, but now I have no interest in doing this anymore.  My youngest is going to school all day starting in the fall and I want to get a job but I am still limited to part-time because of the school hours and having to drop them off and pick them up. Just wondering if anyone else has gone thru this and does it get better?

I am a stay at home mom and have been for around 11 years now. The reason I started staying home with my children to begin with is that my husband started his own business and had to work long hours including weekends. I was basically a single parent. He didn't want me to work because the money I made wouldn't justify him having to come home at a certain time for me to go to work so he could watch our child. He said that all of my money would just go to a babysitter and wouldn't be worth it.He has basically talked me out of every job I have tried to get.  I felt and still do feel worthless. He gets all the praise for being such a hard worker, he makes all the money and nobody really cares what I do, especially his side of the family. I always get the "what do you do" guestions and feel so embarrassed to say I stay home with my children. Because the answer is usually, wow, your lucky you don't have to work. Most of the time I just break down and cry in private because staying at home is WORK and nobody sees what I do, they just think I live the great life or I'm too lazy to work and my husband pays all the bills, how lucky is that. Actually I have come to feel alot of anger towards my husband about this. His business is doing really good now and I feel that now it's my time to get out and work and be around adults, but he would only do this if I could make as much money as he is making. I have been soo depressed about this for soo long.I used to take my kids everywhere and try to get them involved in experiencing and learning new things, but now I have no interest in doing this anymore.  My youngest is going to school all day starting in the fall and I want to get a job but I am still limited to part-time because of the school hours and having to drop them off and pick them up. Just wondering if anyone else has gone thru this and does it get better?

I am a stay at home mom and have been for around 11 years now. The reason I started staying home with my children to begin with is that my husband started his own business and had to work long hours including weekends. I was basically a single parent. He didn't want me to work because the money I made wouldn't justify him having to come home at a certain time for me to go to work so he could watch our child. He said that all of my money would just go to a babysitter and wouldn't be worth it.He has basically talked me out of every job I have tried to get.  I felt and still do feel worthless. He gets all the praise for being such a hard worker, he makes all the money and nobody really cares what I do, especially his side of the family. I always get the "what do you do" guestions and feel so embarrassed to say I stay home with my children. Because the answer is usually, wow, your lucky you don't have to work. Most of the time I just break down and cry in private because staying at home is WORK and nobody sees what I do, they just think I live the great life or I'm too lazy to work and my husband pays all the bills, how lucky is that. Actually I have come to feel alot of anger towards my husband about this. His business is doing really good now and I feel that now it's my time to get out and work and be around adults, but he would only do this if I could make as much money as he is making. I have been soo depressed about this for soo long.I used to take my kids everywhere and try to get them involved in experiencing and learning new things, but now I have no interest in doing this anymore.  My youngest is going to school all day starting in the fall and I want to get a job but I am still limited to part-time because of the school hours and having to drop them off and pick them up. Just wondering if anyone else has gone thru this and does it get better?

My advice to you is to hold your head as high as you can and say, "I STAY HOME WITH MY KIDS". We choose to let others make us feel a certain way and we can choose not to let them make us feel that way.

If you truly want and feel you need to go and work, then you should have that choice, but don't do it because others make you feel bad.

Sherri

I sometimes get people who ask me what I do and when I tell them I am a stay at home mom, their reply is : "lucky you". My reply is: " Yes, lucky me. I work full time and more hours than my husband. (he runs his own bussiness too) I have the best job anyone can offer. ". If you go to www.salary.com you can see just how much you are worth being a stay at home mom. I work 91.6 hours a week and my annual salary is 134, 000.00. (somewhere around that range). They had just done a study on stay at home moms about this and this is what it would  be.

My mil thinks that I should go to work since the kids will be in school this year, but the only way I will go back to work is if she will come down here and clean my house like I do, for FREE. I dont feel worthless for being a stay at home mom, I feel blessed. I would feel worthless if I went to work and then came home to mess to clean afterward. I would feel like I would never catch up.

What do I do with my time away from the kids here at home? Not only do I clean the home, but I planted a garden to which we can eat out of. We have fresh veggies. I sew some of our own clothes, pillows , blankets. I am always on call for emergencies. (we have a diabetic child). I am always here if anyone may need me. As far as adult communication, I talk on the phone, come to the internet, and sometimes people will stop in and ask what all I have in my garden (neighborhood) and I give them some fresh veggies for free. My garden is called the "neighborhood" garden because I do the work and share it all with my neighbors and some town folk. It is mainly the elder. They want fresh veggies but are too old to plant. They have little money. They make me feel very worthy. One blessing for me is to help the elder. Even though I feel like I should be doing more, but seeing their faces light up, is enough for me.

My DH would prefer me to stay at home as well, and the world being like it is today, I want to be here for my kids needs and guide them right . You are just as worthy as any other mother who may be outside the home working.