Topic : Stay At Home Moms

Hi my name is Alysia and I am 27.  I am a fulltime wife/stay at home mom, to 5 kids.  My husband Jay and I have a blended family.  So normally when I talk to people and tell them I have a 16 year old they give me a look. lol  But we do have 5 children, our oldest daughter is 16, our oldest son is 10, our middle daughter is 8, our youngest daughter is 4, and our baby boy is 2.  I feel overwhelmed alot of the time, and being that we moved this past summer from Texas to Arkansas.  I honestly feel like I am just here.  I wouldn't trade anything for my kids, but it would be nice to have an adult conversation during the day. 

Hi Alysia, I am Jetta and I too am marired and a staya t home mom though I do babysit not only here at home but for a business which I take my daughter with me.I have two girls ages 4 and soon to be 6. I would encourage you to get on the web and do some  searching, see if you can come across mothers.play gorups, MOPS (mothers of preschoolers) is a Christian program that you might enjoy as well as PAT (parents as teachers) group. Library story times are great. These are a few wahys that I have made some friends, along with going to churcha nd particiapating int he womens ministry and working with the kids programs. You need to do something to meet your needs as a wife and mother, if you don't then you as wella s your family will suffer for it. Of ocurse you can come to the boards, there are some great people on these boards. I like coming to the parenting and marriage boards so I am sure we can do some chatting.  :) You also have to take time for your self sometimes, even if that means soaking in a  nice hot bubble bath, awwww, that sounds like a good thing for me to do at the moment,LOL.

It's easy to feel overwhelmed as a mother, it takes a lot of time and energy to take care of our children as well as our husbands and our own selves, we have to figure out how to balance our lives to make every one happy and fullfilled, not always easy but is possible. Take care and I hope to see you around some.

 I am a SAHM to a 16 month old daughter, I am also pregnant with baby number 2.  My daughter has been a horrible sleeper since we brought her home from the hospital. When she was born she had acid reflux and it went undiagnosed for several months. I believe she learned her poor sleeping habits then. We now have the reflux under control, but she continues to wake 3-4 times a night. Sometimes for periods of 1-2 hours at a time. We have tried the crying out method to put her to sleep and during the night. But as soon as she starts frantically crying she projectile vomits all over her crib and room- every single time. So we go in and try to rub her back and she goes back to sleep. On some occasions however she will not go back to sleep and I am forced by my need for sleep to rock her to sleep or bring her in bed with us. If I do bring her in bed with us, she thinks it is play time.  I am at my whits end here. During the day, she only naps for 45 minutes. Just enough time for me to shower and possibly check my email. I am worried that she will never learn to sleep through the night. There was a brief time before Christmas that she slept through the night for 3 weeks. But that ended. I have read all of the books and all of the different methods. Help!!!

I used to play soft music for my girls, it was usually classical or the baby back type stuff, maybe a night light and a favorite toy may help. I have heard some people say they have put the baby's crib in their room as well, maybe that will help some.

Hello, I am new here and just wanted to say hi.  Reading through many posts here, there seems to be a nice bunch consistently posting here!  :)  Well, my name is Val, I'm 26, and the Momma to 2 little girls, 1 and 5 years old.  I really enjoy being home with my girls, especially since I worked for the first two years of my oldest daughters life, so I know now how much I was missing.  I'm not the typa gal to judge someone if they work though, I realize staying home isn't every woman's dream, and quite honestly there have been more than a few days that I have seriously thought about going back to work myself!  I'm happy I chose to stay though.  :)  I don't know about anyone else here, but I don't mind so much running after kids (although the occasional gripe might slip between my lips), filling up juice cups, changing diapers, or waking up four times a night to a soaked baby who refuses to sleep anywhere other than in my arms.  I think the most difficult thing for me, especially being young when I married (I engaged at 19, married at 20, and had my first daughter at 21), is the loss of friends.  I think it may be common to sort of, become involved with your family and not go out every weekend anymore with the girls after marriage, but I sort of feel like all my friends are still out looking for men, while I'm married and taking care of my family.  All of them are sweet and wonderful people, but it's been difficult to go from having a close knit support group to having virtually no one.  I was the first of my circle of friends to get married, and now, 5 and a half years later, we've all sort of grown apart and just now many of them are marrying and thinking about kids.  I felt kind of abandoned there for a few years, like no one wanted to hang out with me anymore 'cause I've got kids.  My closest friend, when chatting with her during a low point in my Husband's and my relationship, compared me to going from fun free spirit to a grandma!  Lol*  What's so bad about being like a Grandma?  Lol*  I've always been a sewer, knitter, crafty typa girl, just before I had kids I was making cool things like clothes to wear out, and now I make baby hats...lol*  It's been really difficult for me to make new friends, for a number of reasons, but mainly, because my self-esteem has really dropped.  I'm just not the wild girl I once was, and it really stinks that my friends don't love me for the Mommy that I am now.  Anyone else experience this too or am I a complete freak of nature?  LOL*

Hi Val, I'm Jetta. The board has been slow lately but every once in while I like coming on and posting. I am  an older mom, I had my first at 37 and second at 39 both girls ages 4 and 6. Well, my oldest will be 6 on Saturday the 3rd. They grow up so quickly and I personally love being a stay at home mom and have been since day one though I do have ways of bringing in income.

I think all moms, regardless of whether they work or stay home exerpiecne the type of stuff you are now, I think it is a matter of how we handle it. When I had my first, I was a little bummed cause after a couple of weeks, it was like everyone forgot about us,LOL yes, it's a little disappointing but yet, I wasn't going to let it bother me, Of course we were active in church and had friends from there, but my daughter was actually the only baby, she was the baby of the church and it wasn't getting much better so at one point, I sought out a play group, it was great and then I had my second daughter and we soon changed churches, they had more kids their ages and then I sought out other ways to get out.

Library story times are great, we started going when my youngest was a bout a year old and still go, tehy do awesome activities, especially in the summer and everything is free. Check out MOPS and PAT groups and see if they are in your area, tehy are great programs for mom's and kiddos. I have made a couple good friends through the libray and we have met at the MAll play area. There are ways of meeting otehr mom's you just have to get out and make an effort.

I do understand about the friend thing and the close knit hting, My best friend died unexpectedly 3 years ago and I amstill getting used to the fac tthat she isn't here, and I still find it hard to reach out at times cause I want things to be the way they used to be but that isn't possible, things change, paople go their own ways but life does go on. Don't make your self miserable, make your self go out and meet other mom's, you will be glad you did.

I notice you are from Ohio, so am I.  If you don't mind, where in Ohio are you from?

Jetta thanks for the welcome.  I'm actually doing better, I was really just missing my family tons.  What made it easier is my Sis is moving up here, and my niece is up here now.  Just what my little heart needed.  Thanks for the advice. :)

That's good that you will have family, thal aways helps. Hope to see you around

I was admiring your ability to stay at home with your kids, and also homeschool them.  I think that's an advantage that alot of people dont have.  I do wonder though, how do the children learn to socialize with other kids outside the home? How do they grow up with friends and learn to deal with enemies-how do they  bond with other kids besides the ones at home?  Will they graduate in a "class" full of friends or have a high school sweet heart, or was homeschooling something you planned on doing through the elementary years?  I'm not criticizing you at all, but I have often wondered about the advantages and disadvantages of homeschooling. Kids learn so much from other kids and I just think they need time away from "us" parents.  Sports, beta clubs, and all of the other parts of socialization they get in school. .....although it also avoids the peer pressure of drugs and alcohol being at home.  The family bond you have is special Im sure, but again I wonder is this best for our kids.  Again I admire what you do-really.