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Topic : My Adoption Story

Number of Replies: 413
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Created on : Friday, July 01, 2005, 12:24:13 pm
Author : dataimport
Share your stories of adopting and raising kids, or being adopted, with us.

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June 26, 2008, 8:06 am CDT

Tracking down children

It's a long shot but I have successfully tracked down long , lost  friends via  "their children" using myspace and  facebook accounts. Not  having correct  names may be the downfall but once you  establish accounts with your name there is always a slight chance your children will track you down. With so many young people using these means of communication it might just work for you.

Good luck to all!
Karen
 
June 26, 2008, 12:51 pm CDT

ISO Rita Christine 6/1980 Plainview N.Y.

I have been looking for my adopted daughter for quite some time now, but here in NY with all of the privacy laws I keep hitting brick walls. My daughter is now 28 yrs old, she was born 6/1980 with the name Rita Christine, in Central General Hospital, Plainview NY in the county of Nassau. Since that day I have always felt a void in my life, I have 2 great kids now with a beautiful wife of almost 18 yrs, and they support me in trying to find Rita Christine. If you can find it in your heart to help please do so.

 

I have posted information on just about every web site there is concerning adoptions and looking for, I have complete strangers helping me look up leads through the internet and still nothing. My wife and I just do not have the money to hire a Private Investigator, so i write here for help. If there is anyone out there who is able to find adopted children and is willing to help please contact me.

 

Thank You,

 

Albert DeStefano

 

ald456@yahoo.com

 
June 28, 2008, 5:49 pm CDT

My Adoption Story

Quote From: renee0821

My name is Renee and I was adopted when I was 2. My birth parents were married but very disfunctional so my mother left my father in Cali after he suffered a back injury and was bedridden and went home to Peoria Illinois. Once there she got a low income apartment and  bagn running around and dating and leaving us all at home with our lodest sister who was 4 at the time. Soon she met a man and he didnt want children so she called the state and asked them to take us in to foster care. They refused as she had put us in and out of foster care for years. So Children and Family services told her that they would only help if she released us for adoption. She agreed without telling our father. By the time he found out it was too late. There were four of us girls and  she released us three younger ones for adoption and kept our oldest sister. We were 3 and a half 2 and a half and I was not quite 1. We went to a foster home together but after only a month we were all removed as the preacher who's home we were in was found to be molesting the little girls in his care. We were then separated. I went to two more foster homes before my adoptive family came along. My adoptive father and mother had three of there own children, two boys 7 and 8 and a daughter who was 2. He wanted another daughter, she did NOT. But as she put it he always gets what he wants, so why bother to fight it. From as earliy as I can remember she hated me and her daughter my adoptive sister did as well. I dont ever remember a day that she did not beat me or call me names or yell at me. My sister joined right in and did all she could to make me get in trouble or feel bad. As we got older it got worse. By the time I was 6 my "mothers" favorite name for me was "little Puke". Whenever I would tell my "sister" Im telling Mom she would say to me" She is not your Mom she is my Mom your Mom didnt want you" and I would just turn and go to my room and cry becuase I know it was true. My "sister" would hit me all the time and call me names too and always do bad stuff and then go and tell her Mom it was me. I would try to tell her it wasnt true then she would beat me with a belt twice as bad for "lying" My adoptive father was very abusive as well and he would always come home from work and she would tell him I did some thing or another and then he would call me in to his room and take of his belt and beat me agian. Not spank me like two or three licks with a belt but just wail on me ten to fifteen hits until he felt I had "learned my lesson"  Every night as a child I would pray to Jesus that he would find my real Mom and Dad to come and get and take me back home where I would be loved.  One night I was saying those prayers and my sister told my Dad I was talking and keeping her awake...he came in and grabbed me by the front of my nightie and raised me up and began to hit me in the mouth with the backof his hand repeatedly I am guessing about 8 or 9 times very hard. I was 8...I went to school for the rest fo the week with two fat split lips. No one ever said anything ro asked any questions. My "Mother" had this rule, not for her children only for me that every day after school got out I had exactly 15 minutes from the time the dismissal bell rang to be IN our home. For every minute I was late it was one swat with the belt. It seemed no matter how hard I tried or how fast I tried to go... I rarely made it and usually got a whipping daily as soon as I walked in the door from school. One day I had to go to the restroom so bad but I was terrified of being late so I just started running home. Well I didnt make it anyway and then when I got there she wouldnt unlock the door and told me for every minute I was not IN the door it was more licks and then walked to the door as slow as she possoble could. I peed my pants and that just made it worse.  SHe was so angry that she whipped me in my wet underwear without my pants on and then made me sit in them all night and wear them to school the next day so I would sticnk and be humiliated. I was in third grade. I think the worse incident that came form the 15 minute rule was in the second grade....I had to stay after school and erase the board, cause it was my turn. Well I didnt make it home on time and she had come looking fro me with one of my brothers,. She found me about a block from home and grabbed my hair and dragged me home. When we got there she told me to go in to my room and take off ALL of my clothes. I was terrified. I did and when she came in I still had on panties. She ordered me to take them off and ley over the bed...She began whipping me with the thin leather belt of my fathers. I couldnt stay still after about the 5th hit and began to try to get away which angered her more. SHe hit me everywhere and then the ohone rang...she said to me saved by the bell and laughed...she left and I sat there sobibng and wondering should I get dressed or not...she came back a few minutes later and order me back over the bed again. I was so so scared and hurting and ahamed. To this day recounting this brings fear and sobs and it seems like yesterday. My life was like this my whole life. As I became a teen it only got worse. I began to run away at 15 and at 16 ended up back in foster care. My parents divorced when I was 14 and I loved with her....when I finally got put in foster care they kept me for a couple of months and then sent me back to my father. I lived with him only and it was ok for a while cause I was a senior  in high school. As soon as I graduated I was 17 almost 18 I moved out on my own and never went back. I found my real parents at the age of 24 and my real Father is a big part of my life. My real Mother still had severe issues so I know her but was never able to get close to her and she died in 1998.

To this day my childhood brings me nightmares and feelings of shame. I have sexual issues and have a very hard time being touched and I am so so OCD about cleaning my home. I am afraid always of letting anyone get close to me and I feel like I dont even know who I am. Do people even think about what it does to a child to be given for adoption or think of what kind of home they may end up in. WHen I was 16 before I went to foster care I was in a youth lockdown unit of a psych unit and that was the happiest I ever had been in my life. I was treated nicely and had MORE freedom there than I had ever had at home. There were 15 kids in the unit and out of all 15 of us 9 of us were adoptees. How sad is that! Sometimes I feel like I will never be worth anything  and this shame and anger and pain will never go away.

 

Parents like that should be locked up and beat daily!  How sad and horrible for you to live through something like that.  A child no less!  I don't understand why someone would want to adopt a child then to treat him or her so horribly and it seems to happen a lot.  I worked with a lady who told me horror stories of her growing up with adoptive parents.

 

My husband was adopted, but he has wonderful parents.  He adopted my oldest son and we have two more children together.  He has been good to my son and his parents were so thrilled when we married.  At the wedding they held my 1 year old son saying "this is our new grandson" and he is still very very close to them.  He is 26 years old now. 

 

I do agree though that children have abandonment issues when adopted.  My husband was born then sent to a foster home for 3 months before his parents could adopt him.  They said it was because back then the state wanted to make sure there wasn't anything "wrong" with the baby.  This means he had been taken from his birth mother, bonded with the foster mother and then with his adoptive mother.  I know the issues are there and you can see it in some of his behavior.  I know they were there when he was first adopted also since the letter that came with him from the foster mother said he was a happy baby who laughed all the time and loved cuddling.  His adoptive mother said once that she wished he was a cuddly baby but he was sober and never liked rocking very much.  I think this was because of the loss of the foster mother.  Our daughter had health issues when she was a baby and cried a lot.  He thought it was because she hated him and so he never let himself bond to her very much.  You can see that in their relationship now (she is 25). 

 

We have not searched to much for his parents, I have watched on the adoption boards for someone looking for someone with his birthdate.  He was born the day after christmas, early morning so she must have been in labor all Christmas day.  I always wonder if she thinks of him every Christmas.

 

Good luck to all of you who are searching.  I hope that you find your answers.

 
July 1, 2008, 6:10 am CDT

Searh Angel

Quote From: celliegean

I  was adopted at the age of 15 months. The family that adopted me changed my name and moved 2000 miles away.  At the age of 18 They gave me the information about my bio. family. I  found out that he had died the year befor and they respected my feeling towards funerals to not make me go ar feel bad for not going. I  contacted my bio. mother. SHe seemed nice she was mad that they changed my name and had 2 kids of their won but no skin off of my nose. WHen my Daughter was 3 months old. in 2000 my bio. tole me that she was moving and she would call when she got where she was going. Well my Daughter is now almsot 8 and I havent heard one peep out of the lady. !!! This hurt for a long time. but now I figure that she will never  get to know my middle son who passed away at the age of 7 and a half months. She sill never get to met my ex-husband and she may never get to met my 8 month old baby I have now or his dad. SHe hurt me. I know that she is disturbed. I  talk to her sister every few months to ask if she has heardd from her and she tells me no. I think that if she was really wanting a realtionship then she would have found me. My parents still have the same number they did when she was calling and they know my number.

 I find that her lack of wanting me goes further then her not being able to support me as a baby.

I help people like me that have been adopted
find there loved ones. I am one of those Search Angles that people speak about. We all do this for free. I enjoy spending hours of hard work. To find there loved one is the best reward that money can never buy!
 
July 1, 2008, 6:12 am CDT

Finding your loved one for FREE

I help people like me that have been adopted  find there loved ones. I am one of those Search Angles that people speak about. We all do this for free. I enjoy spending hours of hard work. To find there loved one is the best reward that money can never buy!
 
July 25, 2008, 8:46 am CDT

I am looking for you. Bezanson/Joy

     My name is Corrine Bezanson and I know I have many siblings out there and I am searching for you.
Fathers name : John William Bezanson
Mothers name:Thelma Arlene Bezanson/ or ? My father was married or living with other women and do not know all their names or how many children. One before my mother was Georgianna mae Taylor one child named Patricia or Patsy. I grew up with 7 sisters and 1 brother but know there are more out there. I have found 4 others siblings along my journeys and am very happy about this but want to find all of you. If you do not want a relationship I can understand that, but just let me know you are out there so I know. I have empty spaces in my heart and you can fill them. I am very family orented and would like to at least know you are out there. Contact me at r8drgal@citlink.net
Thank you very much Corrine Bezanson
 
July 28, 2008, 8:19 am CDT

Where is foster child

Approx 1970 our darling little 2 yr old Bi-racial foster girl was adopted to a white family at Eau Claire,WI.Would love to hear from her & family.
 
July 28, 2008, 8:21 am CDT

Where is foster child

Angelia K was the name of 2 yr old adopted at Eau Claire,WI
 
July 28, 2008, 9:26 am CDT

lookin for my daughter....

my name is catherine marie brandon BRUCE.

MY DAUGHTER WAS BORN DEC.19TH 1991

GAINESVILLE GEORGIA

YOUR DADS NAME IS EMORY WAYNE BRUCE

YOUR ADOPTIVE PARENTS FIRST NAME IS ALL I KNOW...CATHY AND SCOTT

I AM HOPING YOU AND I FIND EACH OTHER...FOR MANY REASONS....I HAVE HAD SO MANY DREAMS OF YOU....I JUST HOPE YOU ARE SAFE AND HAPPY AND HEALTHY...

PLEASE CONTACT ME  PLEASE!!!

I WAS TOLD THEY NAMED YOU..CHRISTINA MARIE..

I LOVE YOU!!

I MISS YOU EVERY DAY OF MY LIFE AND ALWAYS THINK ABOUT YOU!

 
July 28, 2008, 9:36 am CDT

MORE FOR YOU ......

Quote From: cat_tastrophy

my name is catherine marie brandon BRUCE.

MY DAUGHTER WAS BORN DEC.19TH 1991

GAINESVILLE GEORGIA

YOUR DADS NAME IS EMORY WAYNE BRUCE

YOUR ADOPTIVE PARENTS FIRST NAME IS ALL I KNOW...CATHY AND SCOTT

I AM HOPING YOU AND I FIND EACH OTHER...FOR MANY REASONS....I HAVE HAD SO MANY DREAMS OF YOU....I JUST HOPE YOU ARE SAFE AND HAPPY AND HEALTHY...

PLEASE CONTACT ME  PLEASE!!!

I WAS TOLD THEY NAMED YOU..CHRISTINA MARIE..

I LOVE YOU!!

I MISS YOU EVERY DAY OF MY LIFE AND ALWAYS THINK ABOUT YOU!

I WAS LIVING IN BRASELTON WHEN I HAD YOUU AT NORTHH GEORGIA MEDICAL CENTER IN GAINSVILLE GEORGIA.....IT WAS EITHER THE 17TH OR 19TH WHEN YOU WERE BORN...

I MISS YOU CRISTINA MARIE!!

 
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