Topic : Foster Parenting

If you are in a repetative abusive situation, the state fears the children are put in danger.  At what point will the abuse turn towards the children.  Will the children be running and laughing causing a parent to get angry and go off the deep end?  Will they get a bad grade thus a punishment be considered cruel and unusual? 

The state takes the children away because the danger and threat is still apparent. Until the that threat is removed and you can prove you are protecting and have the children's safety and best interest in mind, the children will not be returned.  

I grew up with 2 foster sisters because the mother refused to leave the man who abused her children.  Someone had to leave and she wouldn't make him -thus the children were removed instead.     

Use this period to build up the strength to correct the abusive relationship.  If you want your children back, you have to get out.  

This book was recommended to me because it addresses ADHD because most children with ADHD don't fit the classic parenting discipline and child bearing rules.  

THE STRONG WILLED CHILD  by JAMES DOBSON.    I have read several other books by him.  He's great and has a sense of humor.  Not the typical lecture style reading.   

I actually found the book at SAM'S!!  Black and gold cover.   He specifically targets the defiant children at either age 5 or 25!  ADHD children that don't comprehend action vs consequence.  Do things out of spite or to be the ruler.   

Hope the book is insightgul.  

Back in October CPS took away my niece's 2 kids (boy 3 1/2 and girl 1 1/2). My husband and I offered to take them into our home. We have only been married since September and had started trying for a family of our own, but may have to put that off. We will have the kids for at least a year according to CPS. Then after a year if my niece doesn't do what she is suppose to, her rights will be terminated. 

The kids were taken away because of my niece's drug lifestyle and the condition of the house where she lives. The kids seem to be in fairly good health, but have never really been to the doctor. They are both a handful.  Neither of them will listen and have screaming fits that are uncontrollable. He is 3 1/2 and still not potty trained. I am 30 years old and have basic knowledge about how to raise a child, but no actual experience. According to CPS, we are not to physically discipline the children at all. We can sit them in time out, but no spanking. 

My husband and I are both at our wits end and don't know how to control these children. It has only been 3 1/2 weeks, but they are not getting any better and their Mother is not doing anything on her part to fix what is wrong so she can get them back. This makes me think that she really doesn't care and it may come down to where she loses her rights to them and they will be adopted out to someone. I want to say that my husband and I will be the ones to adopt them, but what if they don't get any better and we can't control them. Also, we can barely afford having them 2 and we want kids of our own. I feel horrible for saying that, but I just don't know what to do. I don't mind taking care of them, but I don't feel like I am helping. Yes, I give them food and a place to sleep, but I feel there is something else they are needing and that is why they act the way they do and I don't know what that is. Most people say it is because of the situation, but they acted like this before CPS took them away. Any advice would be appreciated. Thank you.