Topic : Foster Parenting

Which country did you see this?  UK?  If you saw this first hand, would it not be possible to take pictures on your phone maybe?  Then go into DSS ask for right department and tell them that if your complaint is not dealt with swiftly, you will take the story to the tabloids to see what they think of it. If you don't feel comfortable doing it yourself - show a really motivated person perhaps a church leader or a teacher and get them to push it.  Also write a letter to your MP and say you are fed up that no -one pays attention and soon you will have no option but to go to the tabloids to get attention for these children.Also good that you speak out on here,  :)

We also are in the middle of a DSS case that is unfounded, corrupt, and full of un-proven facts, lies, and inuendo.  We are in fear of losing our 4 precious grandchildren, the youngest one was raised by us and in our home every day of his life until DSS came with two police officers to our home and declared they "were uncomfortable with the placement" and took the kids kicking and screaming from our ams.  We did nothing wrong, all care providers - doctors, dentists, therapists, teachers, etc. have said and are continuing to say that the children were making definite improvements while in our care, and even DSS, CASA, and the childrens' GAL told us that we would probably end up with all 4.  We had all gone into this case with the knowledge that our daughter wanted to give up her rights to her boys and to keep her daughter, the oldest.  Katie is 6 now, the twins (my boys) are 5, and Jacob is 3.  He calls my husband 'Daddy'.  All of the children will tell you they want to be with us and live with us.  Well, after they took the kids from us they changed the permancy plan to reunification with mother.  Everyone will tell you that they set her up to fail, but she finished her treatment plan and was doing OK outside of the fact that the house was always messy but I don't know any single mom with four small children who can keep a house clean at all times.  The 'powers that be' would not let us spend any time with the kids unless our daughter was there, although they basically threw it in our face that we had to take them to school, daycare, and back home each day without our daughter being present.  She did not have her driver's license, no car, etc. and they told her that as long as the kids were getting to where they needed to be they would not pull them..In fact, we just found out today that they had given her legal as well as physical custody for the two months they were at home with her.  Two weeks ago everything blew up!  Our daughter asked her attorney to file a motion to dismiss as she wanted the case to be closed since it had been a year and she had completed her treatment plan.  Well, the DSS caseworker did not show up for the hearing and the GAL for the children was not present but someone did fill in for her.  Our daughter was allowed to speak and she told the judge that she wanted to move to Denver where there was more opportunity and the judge told her once she was set up with a job and appropriate housing they would do a change of venue to make sure everything was OK.  The hearing was rescheduled for the next week so the caseworker could be there.  Well, the next week our grandchildren were taken into foster care temporarily we thought so our daughter could go to Denver and get set up.  When the caseworker came to get them she told our daughter not to tell them she would be back for them cause that might not happen.  She took the kids, our daughter called her attorney with no call back, and she went to Denver as all her plans had been made.  That Friday the DSS caseworker called to inform her of a shelter hearing to be held within the hour.  Obviously she waited just long enough so that our daughter would not have time to get back down here (2 hour ride) and she missed the hearing.  The caseworker called her later that day and asked her to sign off her rights so they wouldn't have to take it to trial as the kids deserved some stability and she had already found an adoptive home that would take all 4 of them!!!!!!!!  Now obviously this could not have happened within 4 days!  Our daughter basically told her what she could do with her suggestion and the caseworker said they would be filing to terminate her rights.  We figure they are going for abandonement since she went to Denver even though the judge had said she could do a change of venue - of course while the caseworker and GAL were not there.  We found out today from our daughter that the children have been placed in a foster/adopt home 300 miles from their home but still in the state.  Her attorney told her he had known about it and yet he did not inform her.  We have no money for an attorney and neither does she, so we are going to fight this one on our own.  They have been dishonest, deceitful, and plain cowards.  We are not perfect, but they knew our pasts when they placed the kids with us for the first 7 months of the case.  They knew our daughter would most likely fail - they made her quit school and told her to go on TANF while the case was open as it would be easier for everyone and yet they paid for three months of daycare so she could look for work.  We have been the childrens' daycare and caretakers in general  their whole lives, and in fact was paid by DSS to do so.  As long as the ASFA is in force as it stands, parents and families are at risk of losing their children and children will be castrated from their families, traditions, and they people they love all because our government has given local DSS, CPS, DCF (or whatever) bonuses for putting children into foster care and then more money for adopting them out.  They are supposed to do what is in the 'best interest of the child' but with all of these cases and reports and stories in the media, in support groups on-line and even posted here on Dr. Phil's site, it is obvious that the childrens' best interest is not being served - the best interest of local county budgets and workers financial accounts is what is being served.

As a country we need to stand up and demand that our children be returned to their homes.  The numbers are staggering and unlike times past, the children in foster care and available for adoption are not all abused, neglected, and from drug abuse homes or that of sexual abuse.  As said on this board before, DSS, et al can pretty much say whatever they want and do not have to prove anything.  The courts, court appointed attorneys, casewrokers, GAL's are all paid from these bonuses where it had to do with foster care and adoption and if they all need a little extra, they find a family that has no resources to fight and takes their children.  I haven't heard of a wealthy family going through all of this as they have the money to hire the best and brightest attorneys and they keep their children.

The corruption has to stop!  The defenseless children need to be brought home, and our local counties need to pay for their indescretions.  In a criminal matter these people would be serving time for purgery, contempt, and endangering the life of a child; however, in DSS Land, they are applauded for their 'good works' and saving the lives of abused and neglected children.  How many of you will stand up and fight this?  Dr. Phil the previous writer asked you to stand up and I am doing so as well.  Dig into this story and you will find plenty of families that will substantiate what has been written on your boards in regards to foster care, adoption, and corruption of same.  We, the families that want our children to be safe in their loving (not abusive), caring (not neglecting) homes want you to stand up for us and fight this fight with us.  Can you imagine losing your children or future grandchildren when you have done nothing wrong but simply because you do not have the resources to fight?  It is happening out here in Reality Land and the children are paying the price.  Please, won't you help us to make it a safe world for our children not one where they are in fear of being pulled from their families?  Let's fight this people!  If we don't fight for the kids, who will?  Remember it goes both ways - "IN THE BEST INTEREST OF THE CHILD"!!!!!!  May God be with us all, especially the children!  Jusnanale28

    I am not trying to but in on the convo but I have to say that the DSS has no right stepping into a families home and taking a child because it is a known fact that with every child they get paid around 800.00 for one. I have lost my parental rights due to a father not showing up to court and my child was snatched out of my hands before that. I couldn't tell her I love or nothing. What do any of you suggest? I have faught over and over many times trying and doing everything in my power to get her. I have not seen or heard from her since 2001. All due to DSS and the judge who in fact broke the law. It states in the legislative law under parental rights that no judge in any state or commonwealth can affect one parental right due to another. My lawyers did nothing to help me in court and then outside told me to just move on without her. What right do they have to tell me that and neglect to tell me that I have 30 days to fight or appeal the case? I think that the GOVERNMENT is a joke and lol at the ones who do right and praise the ones who do wrong.

A mother who has lost her child due to DSS

Now if anyone can answer those questions about dss  or a judge then you are god and need to correct the problem. If I offended anyone with that then I apologize. The system needs to be brought down or changed. The parents who do drugs and hook well they don't need their kids but for the innocent ones like me need their child as well as James and his wife. James I live in Va and the system is just as bad if not worse so I know what you are feeling on the inside. It litterally wears you down. DSS did the same to me but the judge took notes and praised me for the progress I made and it pissed DSS off and told the judge I was abusing her on supervised visits.

Try calling your cwkr's supervisor: 'My previous cwkr and I were of like mind re: what was in our foster ch's best interest, but my new cwkr and I have reached kind of an impasse on some issues that were not previously in disagreement.  I don't want to upset my new cwkr (I like him and think he is very good), but is there any way you could help us resolve this problem? Maybe if I could meet w/ you or both you and our cwkr together, we can find a way to get back to being of like mind and get past this.'

Keep very cool and be ready to discuss your position during that very phone call w/out putting the cwkr down or being angry, short, or confrontational.

Get a copy of the applicable state law and agency policy and have them in front of you - highlighted - when you call the supervisor (the policy should be in the agency's handbook for foster/adoptive parents): ' can you clarify for me again your agency's position on transracial adoption?'

Be careful getting the copies.  Although your agency is probably expected to regard you as a partner, that doesn't always happen and you don't want to be perceived by your agency as a trouble-maker.  The applicable state law should be on the internet (findlaw.com) or get it from some other agency.

If the supervisor is the same race as the cwkr and ch's, your success may be more difficult.  Some social work groups, as well as individual social workers, are not in favor of transracial adoptions, even though your state adoption law (and probably the agency's own policy) forbid adoptive placement discrimination.

Although the law is colorblind, many humans are not.

If a meeting involving your cwkr's supervisor does not produce the results you desire, your options are to continue up the chain of command at your agency (which agency's don't like very much), to file a 'complaint' with your agency (all agencies have formal written complaint-filing policies and procedures for their foster and adoptive parents that require review by the agency's top administrators), and/or go to the papers.

You could also hire an attorney, but most such cases favor the agency by their right to make any placement decision they deem to be in the best interest of the child.

Good luck.  You are not alone.  Your situation is far more common than you can imagine.

Your best hope is to find a knowledgeable, professional, objective, child-focused administrator ally within your agency who doesn't feel threatened by foster parents who are willing to fight for what they think is best for the children in their care.